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Is a sexless marriage a good enough reason to cheat?

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Tell me your thoughts on this.



My Wife Won't Have Sex with Me' Is a Pathetic Excuse to Cheat

Posted by Jacqueline Burt
on May 27, 2011 
mad couple

Awww. Poor Arnold Schwarzenegger. It's not his fault he cheated -- Maria's a prude, apparently, and their marriage was sexless! Well, this changes everything! What else was the poor, neglected guy supposed to do? It's just like when Jesse James justified cheating on Sandra Bullock and compared her (unfavorably) to his new flame's performance in bed (Kat Von D).

We forgive you, Arnold and Jesse ... not!!


Cheating on a spouse is bad enough, but to try to pin the blame on her after you split up ... well, that's just pathetic. And it's not just celebs who try to use this get-out-of-jail-free card; I've heard plenty of everyday men cop the same lame excuse. This is a two-fold offense: First, if sex was really the problem in a couple's marriage, it's safe to say both parties were at fault (maybe she wasn't "in the mood" because he doesn't know what the definition of "foreplay" is). These are issues that both spouses need to be vocal about on a consistent basis, talking through problems as they come up. Second, if a woman's been cheated on, guess what? She already feels like a doormat. To diss her sexual skills after you've already broken her heart is tacky, it's cruel ... it's a big bowl of wrong, that's what it is.

Of course, in the end this kind of behavior has the exact opposite effect of what these guys intended: It makes them look like total d-bags and their wives look like saints. It also makes them look insecure, which makes everyone doubt their sexual skills ("No wonder she didn't want to have sex with you!"). So yeah, go ahead and run your mouth off, Arnie. We'll just snicker about the side effects of all those steroids you did.

by on May. 28, 2011 at 5:33 PM
Replies (31-40):
adrianna1043
by Adrianna on Dec. 1, 2012 at 1:01 PM
1 mom liked this
I agree with your take on it. I think no one is bringing up the fact that hormones and self control are the real issues in cheating. Along with drinking, youth, and stupidity! Lol

It's happened since the beginning of time, and it will continue to happen no matter the circumstances.


Quoting lizzielouaf:

I'm 42 which sometimes seems really old. The majority of my friends and associates of around my same age, a little younger a little older. When having girlfriend talk I have heard an awful lot about a lot of different kinds of marriages. What I am willing to live with may not be what someone else is willing to and vice versa. Also I'm willing to deal with a lot different things now that I used to think hell no I'd never put up with that. My views have changed considerably. 

It's extremely important to remember when hearing about someones "situation" there are ALWAYS three sides to every. single. story. His, Hers and the Truth. As an attorney I have heard some wildly and vastly different takes on the same situation. Point being, it's really not for us to judge since we really don't know the third side of the story.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
adrianna1043
by Adrianna on Dec. 1, 2012 at 1:02 PM
What the?!

Quoting Maddies_mom101:

I was watching some TV show/documentary  about people that actually have a marriage that is sexless and  took a vow to make it that way......

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Elle.tea.22
by Bronze Member on Dec. 1, 2012 at 9:02 PM
Quoting musicmomma_89:




I agree with both your replies. Personally if I was stuck in a sexless marriage I would divorce.
A week before the baby was born I wasn't in the mood but I put out and got into it (I guess pretending to be horny girl eventually gets my girls bits going!) and the day after having my baby I was blowing him :P he deserved it :D he was so good through my labor (all 30 minutes of pain :P)
~*~*~ Because food will never taste as good as skinny feels~*~*~
~*~*~One bad meal can't make you fat. Nor can one healthy meal make you skinny~*~*~
sissy852
by on Dec. 1, 2012 at 9:05 PM
no its not a good reason to cheat
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angieo39
by on Dec. 2, 2012 at 8:18 PM
Sexless marriage means counseling. I hold my marital vows sacred. As many deployments as we been through. I have kept my vows but have been through more than I package of batteries.
I understand your meaning partner is there and no sex....try sleeping apart....change things up get counseling ...I bet it ain't sex
Good luck!
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 3, 2013 at 1:57 AM
What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 3, 2013 at 1:34 PM



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 3, 2013 at 6:26 PM



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Right! I never hear anything about means loss of libido?! My husband and I started out always having sex, then after I was about 4 months pregnant it completely slowed down to a halt. It's not like I'm was a huge pregnant lady either and I never lost my sex drive. Then he was deployed to Seoul, and when he returned it continued. I was thinking he had PTSD or something because he started having all these anxiety & stomach issues... I made sure I lost all my baby weight, I dress cute, and I keep myself up, so I know it's not me.  But I read up on it and PTSD does affect libido. However guys I know with PTSD still want to have sex.... Idk but its been about 3 months since we had sex last, and when we talk about it he just tells me he doesn't even have the feeling to... Smh this is terrible... But I never considered I would ever cheat until now, and strictly for sex purposes, because I still love my husband, but damn a woman has her needs too! And there is pretty much no info or support out there for men in these situations.... Sigh 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 3, 2013 at 7:34 PM



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Right! I never hear anything about means loss of libido?! My husband and I started out always having sex, then after I was about 4 months pregnant it completely slowed down to a halt. It's not like I'm was a huge pregnant lady either and I never lost my sex drive. Then he was deployed to Seoul, and when he returned it continued. I was thinking he had PTSD or something because he started having all these anxiety & stomach issues... I made sure I lost all my baby weight, I dress cute, and I keep myself up, so I know it's not me.  But I read up on it and PTSD does affect libido. However guys I know with PTSD still want to have sex.... Idk but its been about 3 months since we had sex last, and when we talk about it he just tells me he doesn't even have the feeling to... Smh this is terrible... But I never considered I would ever cheat until now, and strictly for sex purposes, because I still love my husband, but damn a woman has her needs too! And there is pretty much no info or support out there for men in these situations.... Sigh 


add to it, that men are almost looked down on for not wanting to have sex? I have asked my husband a couple times to go in and talk to the dr about it*I think his is a low level of testostrone*  but he wont do it:/ I have good "dirty books" and an awesome vibrator.. it works for the most part.. when it doesn't there is wine.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 3, 2013 at 8:09 PM



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Right! I never hear anything about means loss of libido?! My husband and I started out always having sex, then after I was about 4 months pregnant it completely slowed down to a halt. It's not like I'm was a huge pregnant lady either and I never lost my sex drive. Then he was deployed to Seoul, and when he returned it continued. I was thinking he had PTSD or something because he started having all these anxiety & stomach issues... I made sure I lost all my baby weight, I dress cute, and I keep myself up, so I know it's not me.  But I read up on it and PTSD does affect libido. However guys I know with PTSD still want to have sex.... Idk but its been about 3 months since we had sex last, and when we talk about it he just tells me he doesn't even have the feeling to... Smh this is terrible... But I never considered I would ever cheat until now, and strictly for sex purposes, because I still love my husband, but damn a woman has her needs too! And there is pretty much no info or support out there for men in these situations.... Sigh 


add to it, that men are almost looked down on for not wanting to have sex? I have asked my husband a couple times to go in and talk to the dr about it*I think his is a low level of testostrone*  but he wont do it:/ I have good "dirty books" and an awesome vibrator.. it works for the most part.. when it doesn't there is wine.

They are looked down upon for not having that drive... I never understood the hype with women not wanting sex either regardless of pregnancy! I would love if my husband couldnt keep his hands off me...I've always been healthy and had a great sex drive and once pregnant it was off the charts Lol... My vibrator died on me, and honestly there is only so much self stimulation I can do, before I'm bored and over that, I need a mans touch! 


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