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Is a sexless marriage a good enough reason to cheat?

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Tell me your thoughts on this.



My Wife Won't Have Sex with Me' Is a Pathetic Excuse to Cheat

Posted by Jacqueline Burt
on May 27, 2011 
mad couple

Awww. Poor Arnold Schwarzenegger. It's not his fault he cheated -- Maria's a prude, apparently, and their marriage was sexless! Well, this changes everything! What else was the poor, neglected guy supposed to do? It's just like when Jesse James justified cheating on Sandra Bullock and compared her (unfavorably) to his new flame's performance in bed (Kat Von D).

We forgive you, Arnold and Jesse ... not!!


Cheating on a spouse is bad enough, but to try to pin the blame on her after you split up ... well, that's just pathetic. And it's not just celebs who try to use this get-out-of-jail-free card; I've heard plenty of everyday men cop the same lame excuse. This is a two-fold offense: First, if sex was really the problem in a couple's marriage, it's safe to say both parties were at fault (maybe she wasn't "in the mood" because he doesn't know what the definition of "foreplay" is). These are issues that both spouses need to be vocal about on a consistent basis, talking through problems as they come up. Second, if a woman's been cheated on, guess what? She already feels like a doormat. To diss her sexual skills after you've already broken her heart is tacky, it's cruel ... it's a big bowl of wrong, that's what it is.

Of course, in the end this kind of behavior has the exact opposite effect of what these guys intended: It makes them look like total d-bags and their wives look like saints. It also makes them look insecure, which makes everyone doubt their sexual skills ("No wonder she didn't want to have sex with you!"). So yeah, go ahead and run your mouth off, Arnie. We'll just snicker about the side effects of all those steroids you did.

by on May. 28, 2011 at 5:33 PM
Replies (41-44):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 3, 2013 at 8:23 PM



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Right! I never hear anything about means loss of libido?! My husband and I started out always having sex, then after I was about 4 months pregnant it completely slowed down to a halt. It's not like I'm was a huge pregnant lady either and I never lost my sex drive. Then he was deployed to Seoul, and when he returned it continued. I was thinking he had PTSD or something because he started having all these anxiety & stomach issues... I made sure I lost all my baby weight, I dress cute, and I keep myself up, so I know it's not me.  But I read up on it and PTSD does affect libido. However guys I know with PTSD still want to have sex.... Idk but its been about 3 months since we had sex last, and when we talk about it he just tells me he doesn't even have the feeling to... Smh this is terrible... But I never considered I would ever cheat until now, and strictly for sex purposes, because I still love my husband, but damn a woman has her needs too! And there is pretty much no info or support out there for men in these situations.... Sigh 


add to it, that men are almost looked down on for not wanting to have sex? I have asked my husband a couple times to go in and talk to the dr about it*I think his is a low level of testostrone*  but he wont do it:/ I have good "dirty books" and an awesome vibrator.. it works for the most part.. when it doesn't there is wine.

They are looked down upon for not having that drive... I never understood the hype with women not wanting sex either regardless of pregnancy! I would love if my husband couldnt keep his hands off me...I've always been healthy and had a great sex drive and once pregnant it was off the charts Lol... My vibrator died on me, and honestly there is only so much self stimulation I can do, before I'm bored and over that, I need a mans touch! 



I do have to say, when we have sex it is pretty awesome.. but I have a friend who complains about how often she has to have sex, and I am over here all "if we "had" to have sex 1/2 as often as you I would be thrilled!" i seriously would be good with having sex at least 5-7 times a week... at LEAST! have days were 2 or 3 times would be nice:/ not pregnant.. just like sex.... :/ wish it wasnt so "hush hush" about women having higher sex drives than the husband/

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 4, 2013 at 12:02 PM



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Right! I never hear anything about means loss of libido?! My husband and I started out always having sex, then after I was about 4 months pregnant it completely slowed down to a halt. It's not like I'm was a huge pregnant lady either and I never lost my sex drive. Then he was deployed to Seoul, and when he returned it continued. I was thinking he had PTSD or something because he started having all these anxiety & stomach issues... I made sure I lost all my baby weight, I dress cute, and I keep myself up, so I know it's not me.  But I read up on it and PTSD does affect libido. However guys I know with PTSD still want to have sex.... Idk but its been about 3 months since we had sex last, and when we talk about it he just tells me he doesn't even have the feeling to... Smh this is terrible... But I never considered I would ever cheat until now, and strictly for sex purposes, because I still love my husband, but damn a woman has her needs too! And there is pretty much no info or support out there for men in these situations.... Sigh 


add to it, that men are almost looked down on for not wanting to have sex? I have asked my husband a couple times to go in and talk to the dr about it*I think his is a low level of testostrone*  but he wont do it:/ I have good "dirty books" and an awesome vibrator.. it works for the most part.. when it doesn't there is wine.

They are looked down upon for not having that drive... I never understood the hype with women not wanting sex either regardless of pregnancy! I would love if my husband couldnt keep his hands off me...I've always been healthy and had a great sex drive and once pregnant it was off the charts Lol... My vibrator died on me, and honestly there is only so much self stimulation I can do, before I'm bored and over that, I need a mans touch! 



I do have to say, when we have sex it is pretty awesome.. but I have a friend who complains about how often she has to have sex, and I am over here all "if we "had" to have sex 1/2 as often as you I would be thrilled!" i seriously would be good with having sex at least 5-7 times a week... at LEAST! have days were 2 or 3 times would be nice:/ not pregnant.. just like sex.... :/ wish it wasnt so "hush hush" about women having higher sex drives than the husband/

I feel the exact same way! I always heard about once your married the sex slows down... but its usually from the woman's perspective. I just never thought I would be in a sexless marriage, I always thought the joys of being married was that you can always have sex with your partner, whenever! Apperantly I was wrong... I really feel sorry for both sexes when their partners don't want it. Even when I didn't feel like it, I would still participate and be happy I did... But for him its just a no go, regardless... sigh : (


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 4, 2013 at 12:07 PM


*hugs*

Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

What about men who keeping the marriage sexless, and the woman always wants it?? I never hear about that...


this tends to be us:( we arent completely sexless, but we usually only have sex once or twice a month.  it caused issues when we were first married but we worked through those issues and while we still dont have a lot of sex, I now know better how to handle the lack of sex:( It sucks because it feelslike no one else knows what I am going through.. women wanting more sex then men is never talked about and it sucks.

Right! I never hear anything about means loss of libido?! My husband and I started out always having sex, then after I was about 4 months pregnant it completely slowed down to a halt. It's not like I'm was a huge pregnant lady either and I never lost my sex drive. Then he was deployed to Seoul, and when he returned it continued. I was thinking he had PTSD or something because he started having all these anxiety & stomach issues... I made sure I lost all my baby weight, I dress cute, and I keep myself up, so I know it's not me.  But I read up on it and PTSD does affect libido. However guys I know with PTSD still want to have sex.... Idk but its been about 3 months since we had sex last, and when we talk about it he just tells me he doesn't even have the feeling to... Smh this is terrible... But I never considered I would ever cheat until now, and strictly for sex purposes, because I still love my husband, but damn a woman has her needs too! And there is pretty much no info or support out there for men in these situations.... Sigh 


add to it, that men are almost looked down on for not wanting to have sex? I have asked my husband a couple times to go in and talk to the dr about it*I think his is a low level of testostrone*  but he wont do it:/ I have good "dirty books" and an awesome vibrator.. it works for the most part.. when it doesn't there is wine.

They are looked down upon for not having that drive... I never understood the hype with women not wanting sex either regardless of pregnancy! I would love if my husband couldnt keep his hands off me...I've always been healthy and had a great sex drive and once pregnant it was off the charts Lol... My vibrator died on me, and honestly there is only so much self stimulation I can do, before I'm bored and over that, I need a mans touch! 



I do have to say, when we have sex it is pretty awesome.. but I have a friend who complains about how often she has to have sex, and I am over here all "if we "had" to have sex 1/2 as often as you I would be thrilled!" i seriously would be good with having sex at least 5-7 times a week... at LEAST! have days were 2 or 3 times would be nice:/ not pregnant.. just like sex.... :/ wish it wasnt so "hush hush" about women having higher sex drives than the husband/

I feel the exact same way! I always heard about once your married the sex slows down... but its usually from the woman's perspective. I just never thought I would be in a sexless marriage, I always thought the joys of being married was that you can always have sex with your partner, whenever! Apperantly I was wrong... I really feel sorry for both sexes when their partners don't want it. Even when I didn't feel like it, I would still participate and be happy I did... But for him its just a no go, regardless... sigh : (




Believe86
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 12:42 PM

  If you and your partner are not having sex, there is definitely something deeper going on. A lot can cause a couple to not have sex on a regular basis.But going weeks or even months without having regular sex is not a good thing.

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