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PTSD Help. I could use some advice.

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:06 AM
  • 35 Replies
My husband has what we believe is PTSD. He has flashbacks, though they are beginning to be less frequent. He has not been officially diagnosed. We are uncertain if we wish to pursue a diagnosis or not because of the potential complications and stigma a diagnosis may presents.

Recently, while we were at a Veteran's Services office meeting with our rep, my husband mentioned PTSD and possibly getting tested/diagnosed.

Our rep said that if the flashbacks aren't that severe, and if my husband feels he can deal with it, it's better to not go for the diagnosis. The reason he gave is that the evaluation process is very painful and a lot of the men and women he helps have said that they would rather have the symptoms than go through more diagnosis or treatment procedures because of the emotional pain the evaluation causes.

This didn't sit right with me. Pain is often how we ultimately reach healing. My husband agrees, but, as he's the one dealing with the issue, is now understandably put off from seeking help.

I was wondering if anyone would be willing to share whatever experience or wisdom they may have in this area. Please feel free to PM if privacy is a concern.

Thank you, ladies.
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by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:06 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Apollos82
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:36 AM
Anyone?
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lilnena98
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:45 AM

I haven't gone trough this. I say you sit with your husband and talk about it. If it is PTSD I would recommend getting help.

Apollos82
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:46 AM
Thank you.


Quoting lilnena98:

I haven't gone trough this. I say you sit with your husband and talk about it. If it is PTSD I would recommend getting help.


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usmclife58
by Nikki on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:53 AM

We ahve not been there, but good luck!!

ilovemyjoes
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 12:25 PM

We're pretty sure DH has PTSD as well, but he was never evaluated.  He was afraid of the consequences it would have for a post-military job, but we've since found out it wouldn't really effect that.  He's dealt with it on his own really well though, and doesn't seem effected by it anymore (last deployment was in 07).  He is still a little jumpy, I have to flash the lights when I come into a room unexpectedly, but as far as I know that's the only problem he still has.
I think if your husband is handling it on his own just fine, and he wants to continue to do that, then let him.  If it gets worse, you can always talk to him again and reevaluate what you both want.  I've only suggested DH try to get a diagnosis because he has issues still from injuries from his deployments.  So those, and the PTSD could add up to benefits for him after he gets out.  I'm leaving it up to him whether he follows through with it or not, but last I knew he wanted to.

*hopefully that's not too jumbled, the kids are really distracting at the moment. :)

momofkamnlela
by Bronze Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 12:41 PM
Dh went to get "evaluated", all they did was send him to a social worker. She had 2 appointments w him and just said he doesn't have it. Personally I didn't know social workers were certified to diagnose such a thing. Anyways that's been my only experience and wasn't even much help with us. Keep me updated if your dh goes and what the protocol is! I'd really appreciate it!
Apollos82
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 12:44 PM
That seems a little funny to me. Is your husband still in the military?

I'll keep you posted on what we learn.


Quoting momofkamnlela:

Dh went to get "evaluated", all they did was send him to a social worker. She had 2 appointments w him and just said he doesn't have it. Personally I didn't know social workers were certified to diagnose such a thing. Anyways that's been my only experience and wasn't even much help with us. Keep me updated if your dh goes and what the protocol is! I'd really appreciate it!

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xxlilmomma09
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:16 PM

My husband is still active -- so things are different for him as far as treatment. But --

I noticed that my husband was experiencing serious signs of PTSD. He was frequently angry, avoided crowded places, couldn't have his back to a door, had horrible nightmares at night, and night sweats. I encouraged him to go seek medical help ASAP to get on the road to recovery.

That was over a year ago, and we are just now getting to a stable point with his condition. He sees a doctor every two weeks. They have him on several medications to help his mood swings and sleep at night. He has gotten 100 percent better, but he still has a lot of healing to do.

The evualation was very detailed though. They sent him home with a questionaire that was about 300-400 questions. He had to file that out and then bring it back. The doctor then went over the questionaire and scored it. My husband received a VERY high score -- indicating severe PTSD. My husband then had to begin speaking to his doctor about the events that he experienced during his deployments. That was very hard for him, because it was stuff that he had never spoken about. It made him experience some of the stuff again. That was the hardest part of his treatment to him.

I will say that you should definitely encourage your husband to get help. It will improve his quality of life. My husband is able to go out to busy places right now, he sleeps at night, and he is able to get up & watch our children grow now :-)

bramamber
by Amber on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:34 PM



Quoting lilnena98:

I haven't gone trough this. I say you sit with your husband and talk about it. If it is PTSD I would recommend getting help.


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Apollos82
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:37 PM
Thank you for sharing!

I sometimes forget all the symptoms of PTSD, but seeing you call them out like that has reminded me that my husband is pretty severe. He tends to write it off, which in turn prompts me to do the same.

We're about to move from a town of 600 to the largest city in our state. He's about to start school and a new job. We can't write these things off any more.

You're right treatment, no matter how hard, is best. Thanks again. I appreciate the insight.


Quoting xxlilmomma09:

My husband is still active -- so things are different for him as far as treatment. But --

I noticed that my husband was experiencing serious signs of PTSD. He was frequently angry, avoided crowded places, couldn't have his back to a door, had horrible nightmares at night, and night sweats. I encouraged him to go seek medical help ASAP to get on the road to recovery.

That was over a year ago, and we are just now getting to a stable point with his condition. He sees a doctor every two weeks. They have him on several medications to help his mood swings and sleep at night. He has gotten 100 percent better, but he still has a lot of healing to do.

The evualation was very detailed though. They sent him home with a questionaire that was about 300-400 questions. He had to file that out and then bring it back. The doctor then went over the questionaire and scored it. My husband received a VERY high score -- indicating severe PTSD. My husband then had to begin speaking to his doctor about the events that he experienced during his deployments. That was very hard for him, because it was stuff that he had never spoken about. It made him experience some of the stuff again. That was the hardest part of his treatment to him.

I will say that you should definitely encourage your husband to get help. It will improve his quality of life. My husband is able to go out to busy places right now, he sleeps at night, and he is able to get up & watch our children grow now :-)


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