I have numerous things on my mind right now, but here are a few.
Peoples attitudes have been irritating the crap out of me lately. ESPECIALLY on facebook. If it wasn't for the many YEARS worth of photo's and social aspect of the site, I would delete my account. It brings nothing but drama. Even to my life. hah. I find myself constantly checking my boyfriends facebook for any kind of female activity. It disgusts me to admit it, but it's true. I'm sick of seeing "Haters this, haters that..." blah blah blah. "OMG my kid just said this..." Half the time I want to punch half the moms on my facebook. You're a mother. Freaking act like it! Jee, your kid may be singing an explicit rap song because you warship lil wayne!
I understand from personal experience (obviously) the need to rant! But every... single... day?! Seriously, find something in your life to be happy about! If you can't, you probably have a mental disorder. I'm not bashing mental disorders either. I'm bipolar... off my medication... AND pregnant! lol Go get checked out. Stop blaming everyone else for your misfortunes. Life suck sometimes, yes. But YOU have the power to make it better! GO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!
I can't help but see some people around me in a downward spiral. What the heck has this world come to?!
Now. To move on to the real reason I decided to rant in this group. Should I feel a little guilty that I'm so needy while he's deployed?
I think about it. He has internet connection, checks his emails daily, and "does his best" to conact me via skype or facebook as he can. His job pretty much has him staying on the FOB, so it's not like he's sent on missions for days at a time all the time. I know these guys are in a war zone, and risk their lives every day for all of us, but I can't help but feel a little under appreciated. I ship your favorite chips in from Canada to send to you, the least you can do is call from time to time. Send me an email that says "Hey babe, I'm thinking of you." Then there's that whole facebook thing again. I leave sweet messages on his fb, why can't he do the same for me?! Maybe I'm needy. Ok, I am a little. I'll admit that. I don't think it's overly needy to want to read something sweet their loved one sent them just because. The more I sit and write about it, the more pissed off I get! My ex went on missions almost daily... and we still spent HOURS on skype... DAILY! My best guy friend is working with Special Ops, they're ALWAYS on the move... and he STILL contacts me more than my own boyfriend. He can read 10 books, catch up on all the latest news, but rarely call me. I mean, do I have the right to complain here... or am I just being overly needy and hormonal?! You can be honest. I thought this rant would help, but it has just wound up pissing me off more. Go figure. haha. So I'm just going to stop before I get myself all worked up and he actually does call. lol, that would be bad.
When it comes down to it, I know the kid loves me. Sometimes I wonder if that's really all that matters.
It's your choice to have or go on Facebook, if you don't like what you see then delete it or ignore it. IT's nobody elses problem that you feel the need to get upset over what they post. It's rather simple.
Your boyfriend has better things to do, hence being deployed, than sit and talk to you all day. Get over it or find a new boyfriend. If he's putting so little effort into you now, he must not be very committed.
Very interesting perspective.
I'm not asking him to sit and talk to me all day. I completely understand that he has other things to do. I don't think wanting to hear from him more than what I do is something above and beyond my rights to ask for. Especially when he can take 10 minutes out of his book reading time to shoot me an email, or call me real quick.
I agree with you though, it does sound like he's not as committed. I suppose he's always been this way. It's just bugging me more now. I think being more emotional is playing a bigger roll in this.
I personally have better things to do with my time than spend hours a day talking or skyping with anyone. I would be satisfied if I were able to speak to my husband once a day- especially knowing that a lot of people MAYBE talk to theirs once a week.
Attitude is everything. Maybe you should take a look at yours.
Quoting USAFamily:
You can hide peoples statuses on fb if it bothers you...
I personally have better things to do with my time than spend hours a day talking or skyping with anyone. I would be satisfied if I were able to speak to my husband once a day- especially knowing that a lot of people MAYBE talk to theirs once a week.
Attitude is everything. Maybe you should take a look at yours.
Remember your hormones are way outta whack with you growing that little one. Ignore facebook, take some time away from any "social networking" and go have some FUN! You need to take a break for YOU. I wouldn't say it's completely whiny, but you are still you. Do things that you would normally do to make you happy. Sitting around waiting for a skype, FB msg, or phone call is only going to make you miserable.
Well...if you don't like what others are posting and you don't want to get rid of it, don't read it... Seems pretty simple to me...
As far as him down range... You have to remember that he's not the only one wanting to call home. he might not be able to because others are using the computer. It's not like he has his own personal connection and is choosing not to contact you...
I think you're being a bit hormornal... It'll get better!
If your boyfriend is like me and my husband it was usually easier to not talk all that often because it was hard with the distance. Doesn't mean he loves me any less, but the goodbyes were always hard. They were gone for about 10 days for some training the end of January and I heard from him 3 times because he was so busy. If it upsets you that much maybe you need to talk to him and tell him how you are feeling. I am with the other ladies on the fb thing!
I think you need to find some hobbies... Something to keep yourself occupied. A life.
I think you need to stay off your bf's FB. And it sounds like you should either delete everyone on your friend's list, or take a break from FB as well.
You are very much being too needy about this deployment. Instead of focusing on your BOYFRIEND not emailing you as much as you would like, think about the WIFE and KIDS that do not get to hear from their loved one for weeks at a time. Be thankful. Learn and live by the elementary saying: "You get what you get, and you don't get upset."
Just curious, what is the reason you have decided not to get married?
Thank you for your comments. After I had a few days to rationalize a lot of it, I want to make a few points.
Did any of you notice that I said I was bipolar, off my medication, and pregnat? I doubt it's easy for many people to just "get over" things that are bothering them enough to publicly vent to strangers in any case, let alone being bipolar AND pregnant.
I also want to point out that I am thankful for the time I do get to talk to my boyfriend. I feel bad for others that don't get to talk to their family as often as I do. But that's YOUR situation, not mine. Fortunately, we have the ability to talk every day. Not that I require or expect a daily chat, but something more than once a week would be nice. ESPECIALLY since the availability is there. It's frustrating. For those of you who did respond with husbands or so's who don't get to contact you often, you can't tell me that if they had the ability to contact you most every day, you wouldn't hope to talk to him as often as possible and then get disappointed if not. Sure, for some it's easier not to talk often. I happen to momentarily (until I make more friends, and find more ways to occupy my free time) be the opposite.
Considering I'm in a new state, thousands of miles from friends and family, pregnant, with two friends (outside of work) at the moment, and adjusting to a new life on my own, I think I have a pretty good attitude. I'm human, and as with any human, we get annoyed sometimes.
And the last thing a woman (or any person for that matter) in an aggrevated state of mind needs to hear is "get over it" and "he must not be very committed!" Seriously?! That's your advise to an admittedly over emotional person? Way to kick a person when they're down and rub salt in an open wound kiddo.
Unfortunately sarcasm isn't easily conveyed in writing. Majorily, my facebook rant was just a rant. If it bothers me, of course I ignore it. If it really bothers me, I'll delete them from my feed.
We chose not to get married until after deployment because of things like this. We want to make sure we can make it through them, rather than find out later that we weren't ready for it. It's obviously a HUGE adjustment for both people, and comes with its hard times.
There were a few of you who were quite snide with your remarks, and they were NOT appreciated. Others, I appreciate your ability to be honest, but not overbearing!
Anyone Stationed in Germany?
- BStagg1986
on Feb. 10, 2012 at 4:44 AM