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Military Families Military Families

Degrading and profanity, As a spouse, I'm pissed! What can I do?

Posted by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:37 PM
  • 43 Replies

It all started with an email that my husband sent all E8.  My husband made an honest mistake by addressing another soldiers rank with SFC instead of MSG and all my husband remembered was MSG coming to his office degrading my husband with words like: "you're a F*&%#! piss of shit", you lazy ass, etc, all in front of 4 other soldiers.  My husband came home looking so depressed!  Never saw this face before...we've been married for 10yrs and never had I seen him this depressed about a situation.  Yes, he has a thick skin, but this situation took it to another level, with lots of profanity and degrading words toward my husband.  As a concerned wife, I feel like no one supports him, he did bring this up to his CSM, but he said to just grow a thicker skin.  I am pissed!!!  Help!  What can I do, because it affect me too. 

by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:37 PM
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InMediasRes
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:43 PM
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Support your husband and be there for him if he wants to talk, but stay out of it. Do NOT get involved in office politics...it can only end badly. You don't want to be "that" spouse. 

fisterswife
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:47 PM
This. You husband is a grown man. Getting cussed out is sometimes part of the job.


Quoting InMediasRes:

Support your husband and be there for him if he wants to talk, but stay out of it. Do NOT get involved in office politics...it can only end badly. You don't want to be "that" spouse. 


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nancym3
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:48 PM
This.


Quoting InMediasRes:

Support your husband and be there for him if he wants to talk, but stay out of it. Do NOT get involved in office politics...it can only end badly. You don't want to be "that" spouse. 


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Apollos82
by Cassie on May. 2, 2012 at 10:50 PM

Support him emotionally from home, but stay the hell out of the office. 

And you bet your cute ass he won't ever make that same mistake again. He'll learn and move on and probably won't remember it in two years time, anyway. 

lovebugs0710
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:53 PM

Ditto.  It is NOT our place to get involved.  

Quoting nancym3:

This.


Quoting InMediasRes:

Support your husband and be there for him if he wants to talk, but stay out of it. Do NOT get involved in office politics...it can only end badly. You don't want to be "that" spouse. 




EmilyMarshall
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:54 PM
bump


Maddies_mom101
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:55 PM

where you standing right there  the whole this went on? if not then how do you exactly know what is said .....you best bet is to keep yourself out of it......unless you want your husband's work to be a living hell for him

hawaiinei
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:58 PM

But how can I support him, and not do anything about it.  Everyone in the office says that it was un-called for and that he shouldn't get away with it...I'm trying not to be in the middle, but when it affects my husband, it affects me, and to me, that's not office politics, it's personal.  When you call another soldier degrading names all because of addressing you with a lower rank by an honest mistake (my husband did apologize for it)...It just bothers me because he would never say that to a higher enlisted soldier, why would he do it to a lower enlisted? 

nancym3
by on May. 2, 2012 at 11:00 PM
If, in the civilian world, this happened, would you get involved? Seriously, I would stay out of it and let your hubby handle it.


Quoting hawaiinei:

But how can I support him, and not do anything about it.  Everyone in the office says that it was un-called for and that he shouldn't get away with it...I'm trying not to be in the middle, but when it affects my husband, it affects me, and to me, that's not office politics, it's personal.  When you call another soldier degrading names all because of addressing you with a lower rank by an honest mistake (my husband did apologize for it)...It just bothers me because he would never say that to a higher enlisted soldier, why would he do it to a lower enlisted? 


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Soniam301
by Sonia on May. 2, 2012 at 11:02 PM
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You support him by lettimg him vent to you. That is all! If you get involved, his life at work will get a whole lot worse!
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