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Military Families Military Families

need to talk

Posted by on Jul. 4, 2012 at 10:05 AM
  • 5 Replies
About two years ago my husband a (marine) cam back from Iraq and he got physical with me 3 times.the first time he just pushed me onto the couch but the other two times was bad.we went to counseling for it and he went to anger managment.anbout a year and a half later I was pregnant with our second child about 2 months and we got into a heated argument and he pushed me.it wasn't a hard push but he still pushed me while I was pregnant.anyways its been about a year and a half and nothing els has happend.and fyi he put me through hell when he was deployed.always thinking I was cheating and I was 5 months pregnant with our first child up until birth during that.sooooo cheating? Uh no. He said what started all his behavior was because I hung up on him when I was working.I tried to explain to him that my boss was right behind me and I was a manager and we had a lot of customers.and I still picked up the phone and said" hey! I love you but I'm sorry I can't talk right now" and then I cried later on cause I wasn't able to talk to him.but he says that's what started all of our problems.I'm sorry but I think that's a stupid reason.so now here we are in a marriage and I don't trust him at all! Not with me or the kids and I feel like if I were to get a divorce he would get half custody and I wouldn't be able to watch my babies.this just happend to a friend of mine so now I'm really scared.it seems like we have a normal marriage now.and I don't feel like he would do anything physical again but who knows.I feel like he had or has ptsd or he is just an ass.idk either way I just want to trust again.any help? Anyone have any opinions for me? Anyone els go through this? And please keep in mind he was deployed to Iraq.he's not some guy that came home drunk from a bar so that's why iv been trying to work things out.and yes I realize its still stupid of me.
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by on Jul. 4, 2012 at 10:05 AM
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Replies (1-5):
barrelracer1699
by Chel on Jul. 4, 2012 at 10:25 AM

Counseling sounds like a great idea for him, you and both of you together.

Apollos82
by Cassie on Jul. 4, 2012 at 10:28 AM
Working things out to save a marriage--IF the abuse has stopped--is never stupid.

I don't normally jump on the counciling band wagon right away, but some good couple's therapy would probably be in order here.

Good luck.
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CadellasMommy
by on Jul. 4, 2012 at 11:44 AM
What I see is him trying to convince you that his behavior is your fault. Hard as it may be, there has been violence in you home and if do not remove yourself and your children from the situation, then you will share the blame if something happens to your kids. There is something wrong with his mind..he needs help. Violent outbursts don't just go away.
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VintageWife
by on Jul. 4, 2012 at 11:46 AM


Quoting Apollos82:

Working things out to save a marriage--IF the abuse has stopped--is never stupid.



I don't normally jump on the counciling band wagon right away, but some good couple's therapy would probably be in order here.



Good luck.
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besosfantasies
by Cori on Jul. 4, 2012 at 12:47 PM

PTSD can show different signs and symptoms.. for my father who is a Vietnam Vet, his signs are very much like this. Did the counseling and anger management not work? Are you able to talk to him about this to see if he wants to be evaluated and have couples counseling?

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