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Military Families Military Families

PLEASE I NEED ADVICE

Posted by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 8:27 AM
  • 27 Replies
My husband and I been together for almost 3 years been married 6 months he is in the navy he recieves money for our housing we have a daughter together and currently pregnant we have two different places and im only working part time he does not help with any bills and gives me 300 a month which is not that much considering I have a one year old who needs diapers clothes shoes childcare and other baby things so not that much money left for food I can't afford my place anymore I don't have any family that can help me out and been thinking about going to a shelter I am so hurt and stressed cuz I helped him when ever he was down with money he still continues to act as if he is single and seems like me and my kids doesn't matter I really need help No negative comments please
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 8:27 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Bronze Member on Aug. 12, 2012 at 8:30 AM

why cant you move and live with him?

KelissaMaye
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 8:30 AM
1 mom liked this
As far as I'm concerned, any BAH (housing money) he gets, should go to you. If he wasn't married, he wouldn't be getting BAH at all.
I don't really have any advice in how to help you though. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. =\
CAMYRA2307
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 8:32 AM
He says it two small cuz it's only a one bedroom but I asked if he could upgrade to a two bedroom but he still have not done that either
TheCrooners
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 9:14 AM
You have two places so you are married and living apart?
KWnavywife
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 9:17 AM
2 moms liked this

That isn't totally true. Depending on his rank, he can get BAH w/o dependants. It isn't as much but the difference isn't that huge.

Anyway, OP- Why would you get married and have children with a man who wouldn't move you in with him first? You really only have 2 choices here, either you move in with him or go down to the court house, file divorce papers and get an order for child support.

Also, and i promise I'm not saying this to be snarky, but periods make posts much easier to read.

Quoting KelissaMaye:

As far as I'm concerned, any BAH (housing money) he gets, should go to you. If he wasn't married, he wouldn't be getting BAH at all.
I don't really have any advice in how to help you though. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. =\


KelissaMaye
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 9:22 AM
True, but since he does have dependants, that BAH isn't for him to pocket. It's to provide housing for his family. It's shameful that he's not helping his family out. =\

Quoting KWnavywife:


 BabyFruit Ticker

mom2jessnky
by Dedi on Aug. 12, 2012 at 9:34 AM

What she said...

Quoting KWnavywife:

That isn't totally true. Depending on his rank, he can get BAH w/o dependants. It isn't as much but the difference isn't that huge.

Anyway, OP- Why would you get married and have children with a man who wouldn't move you in with him first? You really only have 2 choices here, either you move in with him or go down to the court house, file divorce papers and get an order for child support.

Also, and i promise I'm not saying this to be snarky, but periods make posts much easier to read.

Quoting KelissaMaye:

As far as I'm concerned, any BAH (housing money) he gets, should go to you. If he wasn't married, he wouldn't be getting BAH at all.
I don't really have any advice in how to help you though. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. =\



DvlDogWfe
by Stella on Aug. 12, 2012 at 9:41 AM

He's probably playing you. Sorry for the negative comments, but it sounds like you need to be told upfront what's probably going on,  given he obviously doesn't want you to live with him. Something's not right here. I would demand to live with my husband and if he doesn't want to, next step, head to the courthouse and file papers.

ladyd1986
by Member on Aug. 12, 2012 at 10:55 AM
I wasn't living with my husband when first got married either but that was because I was pregnant and it was better for me wait until after I had the baby to move because I was high risk he cant wait until we can move into together and as soon as we got married he add me onto his bank account so yes something is not sounding right about your husband if I was you ill be asking alot of questions
MizxAngelique
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 10:56 AM
2 moms liked this

in most cases, when a husband doesn't want HIS WIFE to live with him its usually BAD. i know love is blind, but damn. its just common sense hunny, there is something called a contract marriage where a man or woman gets married for more money, and that is what it sounds like. Only difference is that you probably didn't know. For only 300/m, shit might as well sign up for some government assistance. im sorry hun, good luck.

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