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Military Families Military Families

Verbal abuse question

Posted by on Sep. 1, 2013 at 5:19 PM
  • 18 Replies

If  a dependent spouse decided to seek counseling off base because she feels her husband who is active duty is being verbally abusive , is the  counselor required to report that to the base commander or whoever it is they are supposed to report it to. I'd rather the military not know about it. I'm not trying to ruin my husbands job or reputation. I just need help with this situation. Also if I decided to divorce will it be in my best interest to state verbal abuse as a reason for divorce or can I just leave it as irreconcilable differences. I'm going to need financial help for sure. Thanks for any advice. 

by on Sep. 1, 2013 at 5:19 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Sep. 1, 2013 at 6:02 PM
No
PinkButterfly66
by on Sep. 1, 2013 at 6:09 PM

I would believe it falls under doctor/patient confidentiality.

usmclife58
by Nikki on Sep. 1, 2013 at 6:29 PM
1 mom liked this

If he is a danger to you or himself, the counselor is under legal obligation to inform the proper authorities. However, if it is nothing more than verbal, without any real physical threat, it will be confidential.

Verbal abuse is not an actual reason for divorce, so you would have to go with irreconcilable differences unless there is more to it.

usmclife58
by Nikki on Sep. 1, 2013 at 6:29 PM

***abuse will not have an effect on the financial help in most cases.

big.city.mama
by Member on Sep. 1, 2013 at 6:32 PM
Do not keep this to your self verbal can lead to physical quickly and by then it might be to late especially with soldiers when PTSD is so push under the rug
darbyakeep45
by Darby on Sep. 1, 2013 at 7:08 PM

I agree with Nikki 100% on this.  Hugs and good luck mama!

Tigger0421
by Member on Sep. 1, 2013 at 7:09 PM
3 moms liked this
Had similar issue with my ex. I went through counseling with military one source. Nothing was reported to his command because it was just verbal abuse at that time. It did turn in physical very quickly after and that the therapist did have to report. Me reporting it did not affect any support I was awarded. Also did not affect my exs job. He did have to go through therapy and anger management classes but was not discharged from the military. Hugs and please don't hesitate to seek counseling for yourself. It really helped me for the coping. Also check out your local hubbard house they have a lot of good resources to help u getting back on ur feet
anchorgurl
by Silver Member on Sep. 1, 2013 at 7:33 PM

 This is the best answer.  If you are being verbally abused, and threats have also been made, please get help because it can escalate to physical abuse. 

Divorce laws vary from state to state; if you are in a no-fault state, you do not even have to give a reason for divorcing and it will not affect support or settlements.

Good luck and take care.

If he is a danger to you or himself, the counselor is under legal obligation to inform the proper authorities. However, if it is nothing more than verbal, without any real physical threat, it will be confidential.

Verbal abuse is not an actual reason for divorce, so you would have to go with irreconcilable differences unless there is more to it.

 

NickLukeandEmma
by Courtney on Sep. 1, 2013 at 8:08 PM

 

Quoting usmclife58:

If he is a danger to you or himself, the counselor is under legal obligation to inform the proper authorities. However, if it is nothing more than verbal, without any real physical threat, it will be confidential.

Verbal abuse is not an actual reason for divorce, so you would have to go with irreconcilable differences unless there is more to it.

 

jas_momof2
by アニメの雌犬 on Sep. 1, 2013 at 10:17 PM

What Nikki said...

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