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Abuse issues

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 16 Replies
1 mom liked this

I guess I'm kind of looking for support/advice...

for the last year my husband has been having a lot of problems, it all started one day when he told me that he had been drinking and he was in an accident and then he turned off his phone, I went out and searched for him had others searching for him and it was all a lie, our next issue game when he tried to beat ( I don't mean spank but beat) my three year old, he spit in my face and grabbed my throat, slammed me into a wall dislocated my shoulder and hit me with a fan. I was pregnant at the time. I called the police and he was eventually arrested and I was treated. He then started having sex with men, transgender people etc. shortly after I had my youngest he tried to attack the kids and stab them with a knife. We are getting a divorce there is no question about it but he is facing the CRC board and the ACS board decided the abuse complaints were founded. He is facing charges of domestic violence, assault with a deadly weapon and some others also. Has anyone ever dealt with something like this, when you were divorced how did custody work out?

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 22, 2014 at 2:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
darbyakeep45
by Darby on Feb. 22, 2014 at 3:07 PM

I've never experienced anything like that, and I'm deeply sorry you are dealing with all of that.  I desperately hope you and your children are in a safe place right now and that your unborn child is okay.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 22, 2014 at 3:11 PM
1 mom liked this
Feel lucky they are actually doing something about it. Stuff like that used to be swept under a rug.
usmclife58
by Nikki on Feb. 22, 2014 at 3:25 PM
4 moms liked this

Since he poses a threat to a children, it is unlikely (but not impossible) for him to get any kind of custody. Hopefully, at most, he may get supervised visitation (though I would fight that as we all know that supervised visitations are not always safe either). Honestly, I would even try to get a restraining order for the kids if not too much time has passed. I would do anything and everything legally possible to keep him away from the kids. And, if necessary, I would have no issue disappearing to a different country with my kids. Just saying.

Did he have some sort of psychotic breakdown?


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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 22, 2014 at 3:27 PM


Quoting darbyakeep45:

I've never experienced anything like that, and I'm deeply sorry you are dealing with all of that.  I desperately hope you and your children are in a safe place right now and that your unborn child is okay.  

We are all safe, thank god. It's just such a painful situation 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 22, 2014 at 3:29 PM

He locked himself into a closet and took a bottle of pills while at work, it's been downhill from there. He won't see anyone or get help because he says there is nothing wrong with him and I am wrong for feeling that we aren't being treated properly 

Quoting usmclife58:

Since he poses a threat to a children, it is unlikely (but not impossible) for him to get any kind of custody. Hopefully, at most, he may get supervised visitation (though I would fight that as we all know that supervised visitations are not always safe either). Honestly, I would even try to get a restraining order for the kids if not too much time has passed. I would do anything and everything legally possible to keep him away from the kids. And, if necessary, I would have no issue disappearing to a different country with my kids. Just saying.

Did he have some sort of psychotic breakdown?


usmclife58
by Nikki on Feb. 22, 2014 at 3:33 PM
1 mom liked this

There is definitely something wrong. One doesn't just change that dramatically without a reason. And I doubt you would have married and had kids with him if he had been like this before.

I wish the best for you and your kids.

Quoting Anonymous:

He locked himself into a closet and took a bottle of pills while at work, it's been downhill from there. He won't see anyone or get help because he says there is nothing wrong with him and I am wrong for feeling that we aren't being treated properly 

Quoting usmclife58:

Since he poses a threat to a children, it is unlikely (but not impossible) for him to get any kind of custody. Hopefully, at most, he may get supervised visitation (though I would fight that as we all know that supervised visitations are not always safe either). Honestly, I would even try to get a restraining order for the kids if not too much time has passed. I would do anything and everything legally possible to keep him away from the kids. And, if necessary, I would have no issue disappearing to a different country with my kids. Just saying.

Did he have some sort of psychotic breakdown?




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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 22, 2014 at 4:10 PM

Jesus....

I just want to wish you the best of luck.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 22, 2014 at 4:17 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

Jesus....

I just want to wish you the best of luck.

Thank you so much 

SlapItHigh
by Platinum Member on Feb. 22, 2014 at 7:45 PM
I'm sorry you have had to experience that.
LeJane
by on Feb. 22, 2014 at 10:21 PM
3 moms liked this

 Typically with abuse- verbal or physical, there is a No contact order ( restraigning order ) issued.     It is something you ( or attorney) will have to request and file.    No one deserves to be abused and it will only get worse if left alone.  

    You would be awarded sole custody and I am not sure if he would get supervised visitation or not.  It is possible but not likely at this point.    

     An attorney will present a custody agreement to a judge for his signature and that is what will be reinforced after signed.     If your husband  gets straightened out and things change he can present  a custody modification.    Which would go through the same process.     ( and not guaranteed to get awarded )

      Stay strong for the kids- do it for them.    No more fear !    It will be better on the other side of this.  I promise !!   Just keep doing the next thing and keep control of your thoughts.    You are stronger than you think.   Believe in yourself and what is right for you and your kids.    You will be fine.   Once you get away from the abuse you will find life is easier, even though you will be on your own for awhile.      

       How do you get along with his family ?   How old are your kids ?   Something to consider is their involvement with the kids.   

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