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Military Families Military Families

Perspective

Posted by on Mar. 23, 2014 at 4:55 PM
  • 9 Replies
So, DH is on a short tour remote so he's gone for a year. Prior seperations have been limited to 6 months. The first six months of the remote clicked along. Our youngest daughter was born, it was a busy time of year, we had done 6 month seperations before. It wasn't a big deal. He came home for two weeks of R&R, met the baby. We had a great visit. But, the second half of this is starting to wear on me. I'm just ready to have my husband home.

At church today, I got a much needed dose of perspective. We have a family at church that are Sudanese refugees. They have 5 kids too and although the ages are spread out more than mine they have a baby that is a month younger than mine. What I didn't realize is that the husband still lives and works in the Sudan. He works for the south Sudanese government and things aren't great in the Sudan right now.

He gets to come visit the U.S. about once a year and stays for about 6 weeks. He hasn't seen the baby yet. They can talk sporadically on the phone but the connection is not so good. There are no plans currently for him to be able to love permently in the states and it is too dangerous for them to go visit in the Sudan. I have never heard her complian once. I had no idea until today that this was even the situation. I have only known her a year, but they moved to America 12 years ago and I am under the impression that this has been the situation the entire time.

At any rate, I know that we all have our trials and tribulations in military life. Deployments and remotes are not fun and everyone has their story. Some have it harder than others and I am not trying to downplay the difficulties that anyone else has faced/is facing. However, for me, knowing that she sees her husband only six weeks at a time maybe once a year, for the past 12 years with no end in sight, sure put a different perspective on my situation.
by on Mar. 23, 2014 at 4:55 PM
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Replies (1-9):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Mar. 23, 2014 at 5:13 PM
1 mom liked this

That was gift. =)

 

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Mar. 23, 2014 at 5:18 PM
1 mom liked this

Thanks for sharing.  I definitely agree with you...it's all about perspective.  Glad you're thinking about things differently now...I know I will:)

usmclife58
by Nikki on Mar. 23, 2014 at 6:40 PM
1 mom liked this

:)

anchorgurl
by Silver Member on Mar. 23, 2014 at 7:05 PM
1 mom liked this

 It always happens to me that when I'm feeling overwhelmed that I see something like that.  It does make you think about how lucky you really are :)

SlapItHigh
by Platinum Member on Mar. 25, 2014 at 12:12 AM
1 mom liked this

Hugs and thanks for sharing!

adrianna1043
by Adrianna on Mar. 25, 2014 at 12:32 AM
1 mom liked this
You are a super mom! I feel for that lady, that would suck! I was talking to a nail technician a while back, she was a little old Vietnamese lady. She said that she married an American service member and had two kids and he became a POW for over 5 years. She didn't hear anything but held out hope. Until one day he was released and they went on to have 5 more kids. I always remember her story when I think I have it though.
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JMmama
by Kara on Mar. 25, 2014 at 1:07 AM
1 mom liked this
Wow. That is amazing! I cannot imagine going 5 years with no word just hoping he is okay. What an incredible story,

Quoting adrianna1043: You are a super mom! I feel for that lady, that would suck! I was talking to a nail technician a while back, she was a little old Vietnamese lady. She said that she married an American service member and had two kids and he became a POW for over 5 years. She didn't hear anything but held out hope. Until one day he was released and they went on to have 5 more kids. I always remember her story when I think I have it though.
TippyD
by Gold Member on Mar. 25, 2014 at 12:18 PM

YES! first, thank you for sharing this!, second.. YES YES YES! while in our separation it can be overwhelming and like no one understands, but we, military wives as a whole, have it SOOOO easy compared to other situations.. and have so many more luxeries than the spouses before us! while communication may be hard, I just think even 20/30 years ago, no internet, spotty phone calls at BEST, month long trips for letters, etc.. kwim!?!?!? i think if more wives heard stories like this and actually saw what it is like to really not see/hear frm a spouse they would be more appreciative for the luxury that is email, decent phone calls, etc

24clark
by Member on Mar. 25, 2014 at 1:27 PM

Perspective is a gift from God! Sorry for your situation, but thanks for sharing how this news impacted your views. 

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