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Posted by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 11:53 AM
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Do your family and friends get the fact that the military kinda runs your life?  Most of our family and friends don't understand we can't commit to attending things because needing leave to be approved.  They think the hubby can just request leave anytime.  It gets frustrating having to reiterate fact that.  For instance my cousin gets married in August well we don't know if we can go. Especially since my husband is in school. 

by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 11:53 AM
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by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 11:59 AM
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I do understand that. Our family has gotton better over the years with it but still asks questions & we have to keep telling it over & over. They don't understand it all & there's a lot we don't say. One family wants us to move home & we are like " uh yea can't right now"
My husband is a lifer & the $ is good, health insurance & stability we can't get anywhere else, specially where we are from.
by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:13 PM

My mother-in-law says the same thing. We will never move back home even when he gets out. Mine is a life too. 

by Silver Member on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:21 PM
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Most of my family understands that we can't commit to things but sometimes my mom gets upset with it. Good example is my grandfather's 90th bday in July. We are sending the girls to stay with her for 2 weeks and they will be there for his bday. She has asked repeatedly if both DH and I will be there and I can't answer that. Especially since he is leaving his unit (demobilizing and will be completely disbanded in May) and therefore cannot put in for leave until we know where he's going. So far they haven't decided where he and the remaining NCO's are going. He's been told 5 different things in the last two months. Hoping to find out soon if he's deploying, we're staying here or PCSing. DH is a lifer as well and when he does retire we are moving to NC (where he is from). We just bought our "till death do us part" land and plan on building a house not too far from his hometown.
by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:40 PM
My dh has only been in since September, so in their defense my family hasn't had a lot of time to adjust, but I'm already hearing it. They think I should just leave him behind and not think twice. Or they ask me to attend events like a week away. If only it were that easy or that cheap!
by アニメの雌犬 on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:42 PM

Never had a problem...

by Silver Member on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:48 PM

My family has always been understanding. There have been a few incidents that they were less that thrilled with how things were working out, but they get the big picture.

by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:49 PM
When my husband is done we will move on the east coast by the beach we like. But moving back to our hometown prolly not. There's nothing there, let alone jobs! Our families don't pay our bills we do! We go home often bc right now we are 2 hrs from our home town so it's nice. But moving cross country in 4 months. So we are trying to see them as much. My family def understands bc my brother is active duty too. But my husbands parents don't seem too as much. Thinking he was getting out & we moving home. He was re in listing for another 4 years! Half the time I think they don't even listen!
by Bronze Member on Mar. 26, 2014 at 12:54 PM

Yeah. My mom doesn't get any of it. She's having the hardest time with the, you don't pick where you go, you go where you are told part. She doesn't enjoy the lack of planning/predictability. She also doesn't understand what a huge PITA it is to fly halfway across the country with a preschooler in tow every time she wants there....sigh. I know all her complaining comes from love so I tune out what I can and reassure where I can and occasionally accommodate when I can.

by Silver Member on Mar. 26, 2014 at 1:33 PM

We do not let the miltiary dictate our lives like that- if DH can't go then I will go without him.

I also work full time and sometimes I cannot get off to do something- and DH will go and I will stay.

My familiy understands that Work happens- it does not matter the source of that employment

by on Mar. 26, 2014 at 1:38 PM

My family understands, my dh's family does not.  If I want to do so etching and my dh can't go, the kids and I go without him.  I have taken many vacations in the last 13 years without him.

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