Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I was dignosed

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 3 Replies

I was diagnosed today with PTSD. My fiance is a Iraqi Freedom vet for the us army. He has it too. He's the one that pointed out to me I have similarities to him when he came home. I have it from 9/11. My dad was killed at the WTC and I saw the whole thing from my classroom. I never really went to therapy, it was kind of  a no-no in my culture / household.

I knew I had anxiety from it but i didn't want to accept i had PTSD. I cant go on airplanes let alone look at them. I moved 2,000 miles away from NYC to avoid seeing the skyline. I freakout inside when I see muslim men and women but never speak up or get rude with them, I AM very hyper vigilant I have to sit by the door or main windows when we go out to eat. I can't go to the mall without having anxiety. I have paranoia that I will die in public.

I am worried that I trigger him and he triggers me and I hope this talk therapy helps. Does anyone else in this group have PTSD? Does it affect your relationship? Does your triggers set off your soldier? I am so worried I am going to cause him a mental breakdown.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 23, 2018 at 7:37 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-3):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 23, 2018 at 7:40 PM

BUMP

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 23, 2018 at 9:06 PM

I am so very sorry about losing your Dad that way.  We live less than 10 miles from Ground Zero and saw the aftermath from here.  My Mom saw the towers fall from her balcony in the Bronx.  We know people who lost family.  It was the day my 16 yr old son decided to become a Marine, which he did 4 years later.  It was a horrific time, and I am so sorry for your loss.  PTSD is defined as a normal reaction to abnormal circumstances.  My son is a Marine veteran of both Iraq and Afghanistan. He has PTSD and has been getting therapy since before his EAS.  He's functional, works, has a family. But last Christmas, while going through a "live Bethlehem" exhibit with his wife and two young children, the sights and smells of the exhibit - they had Roman soldiers who talked to you, real foods, live animals (he said it was like Marjah, Afghanistan, without the motor scooters) triggered an "episode".  He handled it well, he just politely told the "soldiers" not to talk to him, and receded into the background as best he could, and kept going for the sake of his kids, and the expensive tickets his wife had bought. But it was very unsettling to him.  His wife commented later that she thought he'd "gotten over it", but as he said, one never does.  You learn to live with it and that usually takes therapy.  Five years ago, my husband was home here alone (I was away at a convention in Denver) when Hurricane Sandy flooding pour 5 feet of water into the yard and basement of our home.  We were able to stay in the home, our insurance paid a lot, and inside of a few weeks, we were all cleaned up and replaced our appliances and furnace/hot water heater, etc.  But for more than a year after, he acted very peculiar, being very cautious and prepared for every storm and refusing to go places if one was predicted.  My son told me that Dad had PTSD.  I had never thought of it that way, but I was sure he was right and I change the way I reacted to his strange behavior, and eventually, he calmed down.  He didn't go to therapy, but I think my awareness and change of attitude helped.  I would strongly recommend that if you and your fiance are that concerned about "triggers", you should seek therapy.  Talk therapy sounds like a good idea - it is often those who suffer in silence who suffer the most.  Then their family and friends are shocked when something happens.  Good luck and I hope that it all works for you. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 23, 2018 at 9:22 PM
1 mom liked this
Thank you so much for this. This has helped me a lot

Quoting Anonymous 2:

I am so very sorry about losing your Dad that way.  We live less than 10 miles from Ground Zero and saw the aftermath from here.  My Mom saw the towers fall from her balcony in the Bronx.  We know people who lost family.  It was the day my 16 yr old son decided to become a Marine, which he did 4 years later.  It was a horrific time, and I am so sorry for your loss.  PTSD is defined as a normal reaction to abnormal circumstances.  My son is a Marine veteran of both Iraq and Afghanistan. He has PTSD and has been getting therapy since before his EAS.  He's functional, works, has a family. But last Christmas, while going through a "live Bethlehem" exhibit with his wife and two young children, the sights and smells of the exhibit - they had Roman soldiers who talked to you, real foods, live animals (he said it was like Marjah, Afghanistan, without the motor scooters) triggered an "episode".  He handled it well, he just politely told the "soldiers" not to talk to him, and receded into the background as best he could, and kept going for the sake of his kids, and the expensive tickets his wife had bought. But it was very unsettling to him.  His wife commented later that she thought he'd "gotten over it", but as he said, one never does.  You learn to live with it and that usually takes therapy.  Five years ago, my husband was home here alone (I was away at a convention in Denver) when Hurricane Sandy flooding pour 5 feet of water into the yard and basement of our home.  We were able to stay in the home, our insurance paid a lot, and inside of a few weeks, we were all cleaned up and replaced our appliances and furnace/hot water heater, etc.  But for more than a year after, he acted very peculiar, being very cautious and prepared for every storm and refusing to go places if one was predicted.  My son told me that Dad had PTSD.  I had never thought of it that way, but I was sure he was right and I change the way I reacted to his strange behavior, and eventually, he calmed down.  He didn't go to therapy, but I think my awareness and change of attitude helped.  I would strongly recommend that if you and your fiance are that concerned about "triggers", you should seek therapy.  Talk therapy sounds like a good idea - it is often those who suffer in silence who suffer the most.  Then their family and friends are shocked when something happens.  Good luck and I hope that it all works for you. 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)