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Sad..Bummed..Hurt..You name it..that is what i am. *UPDATE*

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 Today was a crappy day for me!!!!! I am a single Mother to a wonderful almost 16 year old son who for now lives with me but does visit his dad on the weekend and sometimes during the week. When i came home from work tonight my son told me his father was coming over because he had something to tell me and he wanted his dad here. Let me tell you it was a punch in the stomach!!! My son told me tonight he wants to go and live with his dad for a while because he misses being with him. His father was not always in his life when he was young as he did not live here. But when his dad left the military he moved back and fell into a great place in jacob's life. We have shared custody and it is up to us to divide the time so basically he is here most weeks and with his dad most weekends. neither one of us pay child support..So if we were to switch it up and it would not intefere with custody either way. I am at a loss because i do not know what to say..I am sooo sad and have been super upset since about 6. I know he needs his dad but i am not sure i want to disrupt his schedule like that.. so i am at a loss and his dad is happy with whatever i choose to do...Soo these next couple of days will be rough ones.

 

*** I updated on page 2 ladies!! Thank you for all of your cares and support it means so much to me!!! ****

by on Feb. 21, 2012 at 11:21 PM
Replies (11-20):
CopperGirl
by on Feb. 22, 2012 at 2:24 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh wow. That would hurt me too. If his dad is a responsible person and can handle having him and it sounds as if your son is pretty mature about the whole thing, I would have a hard time not letting him go if it is what he really wants and feel he needs even if it would completely rip my heart out. Hugs and prayers sent your way. :(

amonkeymom
by on Feb. 22, 2012 at 3:05 PM
1 mom liked this

hugs

terri76
by Terriny on Feb. 22, 2012 at 8:35 PM

 I just want to say thank you to everyone for being here for me as this is such a rough time for me!!! I did not sleep much last night as i was up thinking about what was best for all of us as a family and i decided i needed to speak with my ex and see where he stood on this.. So this am i called him and invited him and his live in gf to lunch....she decided to step back and let us have lunch..So i took an extended lunch and we talked about everything..

 So for now i have decided to let jacob have what he wants and to see how it works out.. As much as it rips my heart out to do this i do not want to look back and say why did i do that to him!!! Jacob is the best thing i have ever done in my life and i only want what is best for him and he is 15 and knows what he wants...So we are going to take him to dinner on friday night to let him know what we chose to do...So this weekend will be a rough one for me to say the least.. I will be helping my "baby" pack all his prized possessions to move to his dad's house. Well the important things that he needs anyways lol.

 So this weekend is all about him and I. We will be spending time together. I know it is not like i will never see him but it just will not be the same!!! And he knows his momma is always just a phone call away!!!

So thank you for everyone for all of your support and i hope that i survive my first week alone :-D

 

group hug

Army_Mom_2_Boyz
by on Feb. 22, 2012 at 9:01 PM

We are all here if you need us! We will help you make it through :)

Quoting terri76:

 I just want to say thank you to everyone for being here for me as this is such a rough time for me!!! I did not sleep much last night as i was up thinking about what was best for all of us as a family and i decided i needed to speak with my ex and see where he stood on this.. So this am i called him and invited him and his live in gf to lunch....she decided to step back and let us have lunch..So i took an extended lunch and we talked about everything..

 So for now i have decided to let jacob have what he wants and to see how it works out.. As much as it rips my heart out to do this i do not want to look back and say why did i do that to him!!! Jacob is the best thing i have ever done in my life and i only want what is best for him and he is 15 and knows what he wants...So we are going to take him to dinner on friday night to let him know what we chose to do...So this weekend will be a rough one for me to say the least.. I will be helping my "baby" pack all his prized possessions to move to his dad's house. Well the important things that he needs anyways lol.

 So this weekend is all about him and I. We will be spending time together. I know it is not like i will never see him but it just will not be the same!!! And he knows his momma is always just a phone call away!!!

So thank you for everyone for all of your support and i hope that i survive my first week alone :-D

 

group hug


terri76
by Terriny on Feb. 22, 2012 at 9:13 PM

 Thank you soooooo much!!!! It was so rough last night i just had to think it through and make a choice because i needed to decompress and be me for my son. I can not mope around because i do not want him feeling guilty for asking to spend time with his dad

Quoting Army_Mom_2_Boyz:

We are all here if you need us! We will help you make it through :)

Quoting terri76:

 I just want to say thank you to everyone for being here for me as this is such a rough time for me!!! I did not sleep much last night as i was up thinking about what was best for all of us as a family and i decided i needed to speak with my ex and see where he stood on this.. So this am i called him and invited him and his live in gf to lunch....she decided to step back and let us have lunch..So i took an extended lunch and we talked about everything..

 So for now i have decided to let jacob have what he wants and to see how it works out.. As much as it rips my heart out to do this i do not want to look back and say why did i do that to him!!! Jacob is the best thing i have ever done in my life and i only want what is best for him and he is 15 and knows what he wants...So we are going to take him to dinner on friday night to let him know what we chose to do...So this weekend will be a rough one for me to say the least.. I will be helping my "baby" pack all his prized possessions to move to his dad's house. Well the important things that he needs anyways lol.

 So this weekend is all about him and I. We will be spending time together. I know it is not like i will never see him but it just will not be the same!!! And he knows his momma is always just a phone call away!!!

So thank you for everyone for all of your support and i hope that i survive my first week alone :-D

 

group hug


 

fallnangel3
by on Feb. 22, 2012 at 9:24 PM
I'm sure this was a hard decision to make, but I'm glad you went with this choice. I can see a boy his age wanting to be around his dad. ((Hugs))

Quoting terri76:

 I just want to say thank you to everyone for being here for me as this is such a rough time for me!!! I did not sleep much last night as i was up thinking about what was best for all of us as a family and i decided i needed to speak with my ex and see where he stood on this.. So this am i called him and invited him and his live in gf to lunch....she decided to step back and let us have lunch..So i took an extended lunch and we talked about everything..


 So for now i have decided to let jacob have what he wants and to see how it works out.. As much as it rips my heart out to do this i do not want to look back and say why did i do that to him!!! Jacob is the best thing i have ever done in my life and i only want what is best for him and he is 15 and knows what he wants...So we are going to take him to dinner on friday night to let him know what we chose to do...So this weekend will be a rough one for me to say the least.. I will be helping my "baby" pack all his prized possessions to move to his dad's house. Well the important things that he needs anyways lol.


 So this weekend is all about him and I. We will be spending time together. I know it is not like i will never see him but it just will not be the same!!! And he knows his momma is always just a phone call away!!!


So thank you for everyone for all of your support and i hope that i survive my first week alone :-D


 


group hug

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Meltopia529
by on Feb. 23, 2012 at 11:42 AM

 We are here if you need us! I think you made the right decision by letting him go. If things don't work out, grades slipping or what not, he could always move back. Enjoy your weekend with him. And I'm sure you'll do just fine by yourself. =D

terri76
by Terriny on Feb. 23, 2012 at 7:58 PM

 It was a very very difficult one to make.. I am not sure yet if i am glad with my decision yet or not.. I know at his age it is a big thing to be with your dad. I guess i just have to let it settle on my brain and see how it goes. I am a bit nervous because i do not want to see his grades slip or anything. I am so on top of that and i hope his dad will be as well. But i am willing to give it a try and see what happens :-) Thank you!!!!!!

Quoting fallnangel3:

I'm sure this was a hard decision to make, but I'm glad you went with this choice. I can see a boy his age wanting to be around his dad. ((Hugs))

Quoting terri76:

 I just want to say thank you to everyone for being here for me as this is such a rough time for me!!! I did not sleep much last night as i was up thinking about what was best for all of us as a family and i decided i needed to speak with my ex and see where he stood on this.. So this am i called him and invited him and his live in gf to lunch....she decided to step back and let us have lunch..So i took an extended lunch and we talked about everything..


 So for now i have decided to let jacob have what he wants and to see how it works out.. As much as it rips my heart out to do this i do not want to look back and say why did i do that to him!!! Jacob is the best thing i have ever done in my life and i only want what is best for him and he is 15 and knows what he wants...So we are going to take him to dinner on friday night to let him know what we chose to do...So this weekend will be a rough one for me to say the least.. I will be helping my "baby" pack all his prized possessions to move to his dad's house. Well the important things that he needs anyways lol.


 So this weekend is all about him and I. We will be spending time together. I know it is not like i will never see him but it just will not be the same!!! And he knows his momma is always just a phone call away!!!


So thank you for everyone for all of your support and i hope that i survive my first week alone :-D


 


group hug

 

terri76
by Terriny on Feb. 23, 2012 at 8:08 PM

 Thank you soo much!!!!! I am hoping i made the right decision. I am still unsure of it but i think it is because i am still a bit upset and hurt by it. But i will survive this i know :-D. I will be keeping a close eye on his grades online and will step in if i have too!!! I will totally enjoy my weekend.. And i know i will be fine but it will take me a few days.. i hate being alone LOL

Quoting Meltopia529:

 We are here if you need us! I think you made the right decision by letting him go. If things don't work out, grades slipping or what not, he could always move back. Enjoy your weekend with him. And I'm sure you'll do just fine by yourself. =D

 

sweetlyblissful
by on Feb. 24, 2012 at 1:06 AM
You are very strong!! I can only imagine how hard that decision was for you. I have an 11 year old DS. He sees his dad every other weekend. I also have a very civil relationship with his dad. If I was faced with that decision, I would be a mess. It's great how you are thinking of your DS through all of it. I hope the adjustment goes well. Wishing you all the best with the move and big changes in your life and your sons too.
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