Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Parenting Positive Kids Parenting Positive Kids

Do you think this mom's method of punishment was too extreme?

Posted by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 7:54 AM
  • 16 Replies

Mom Punishes Daughter Via Facebook & People Freak Out

Posted by Julie Ryan Evans on April 27, 2012 

Ava AbbottOhio mom Denise Abbott has started a firestorm of debate after she used Facebook to discipline her 13-year-old daughter, Ava. After Ava was being disrespectful and was involved in too much online drama with friends, her mother took to the social media site to try and teach her daughter a lesson.

She changed her daughter's profile picture to one that showed a red "X" over her mouth with a caption that read: "I do not know how to keep my [mouth shut]. I am no longer allowed on Facebook or my phone. Please ask why."

Denise told the Today show:

I decided to do something that I know would totally impact her, and that the next time she started that, she'd think 'I don't want my face all over Facebook again with a red 'X' over my mouth.'

Harsh and a little humiliating for the girl, perhaps, as plenty are crying with outrage. And yes, experts will chime in and tell us all of the reasons why it's not the "right" way to address an unruly child. But it also feels like an almost inevitable sign of the times. I mean corporal punishment is pretty much criminal these days; grounding only gets you so far; and even some good old-fashioned screaming will probably get you a visit from child services. So what's a concerned parent to do?

Yes, there's talking, setting expectations, and all of that other stuff that sounds so good ... until you're dealing with a teenager who absolutely won't behave no matter what you do. Then what?

While in principle I don't agree that humiliating children is the best way to teach a lesson, I also think it's a hell of a lot better than not disciplining them at all. And honestly, in this case, the mother's method fit the crime pretty well.

As for Ava, she doesn't seem scarred by the whole incident either. She told NBC that she felt like she deserved it. "It made me realize that i didn't want my picture on there like that." Of course, maybe she just said that because she's scared of what crazy punishment her mother would come up with if she didn't.

Do you think this mom's method of punishment was too extreme?

by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 7:54 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Audreesmommy757
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 9:16 AM

alittle extreme yes

jlc87
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 10:42 AM
extreme but not harmful i don't think. plus we don't know the whole story.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MommaNuney
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 11:01 AM

Extreme? Yes, but not harmful...it really got the point across to the daughter for sure. Sometimes, I think, it takes extreme measures to get things across to teens these days.

Meltopia529
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 2:21 PM

 Yes it think it was extreme, but it did get her point across

mysticalmalissa
by Gold Member on Apr. 27, 2012 at 6:06 PM

I say good for Mom! I dont think it was extreme in the least.

hance6
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 6:49 PM

Personally, I wish she was my mom, cause my mom wouldn't have been so nice.......I grew up in a no nonsense home, but I thank my mom everyday for being firm with me, it shaped me into a repectful, hard working, and appreciative adult!  So no I don't think she was extreme.

PNMom
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 7:19 PM

Actually I think its differnt and likely effective. Not only that i am 90% certain it had the desired impac ton the child. I might bring this issue to our forum for discussion  at parentnook.com

 

 

Brandiec214
by on Apr. 28, 2012 at 10:44 AM

 I lOVE this. I think this was the perfect punishment. There are so many stories about kids being bullied and/or jumped and beaten up due to Facebook and any other social media and it all starts from this crap (kids running their mouth). If they cant use it wisely they need to be taught a lesson.

terri76
by on Apr. 28, 2012 at 10:52 AM

Extreme?? Maybe a little...But it is better then allowing her to be hurtful and possibly bullying people...Kids need to learn somehow and if this works for them then that is great!!!

SabrinaLC
by on Apr. 28, 2012 at 6:14 PM

I wouldn't do it to my own children

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN