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Mom's Advice is Often the Best

Posted by on May. 9, 2012 at 12:00 AM
  • 32 Replies


There's an old ditty that makes a lot of sense. In it, the writer tells how, as a young girl, she thought her mom knew nothing. It was only as she got older that she realized the wisdom that her mom had tried to share - and how desperately she missed her mother when she'd passed away. I know exactly what the author of this poem meant.

Like almost all of us, I thought that I knew everything. And, boy, do I mean everything. Even though my mom was a college graduate with a couple of degrees and a string of letters after her name, as a teen I was completely flabbergasted that she managed to breathe on her own.

I'm not sure that any of us would want to have me for a daughter.

When I married, I consulted my mom sporadically, but the true test came when I began to have babies. Suddenly, the woman who knew nothing became #1 on my speed dial. It wasn't uncommon for me to call her multiple times a day, just to ask advice or pick her brain or just get some badly needed reassurance that I wasn't going to raise the Son of Sam killer.

My mom was a great one for giving me knowledge. She didn't answer any questions that I asked her, though - she told me where and how to find the answers. It was wildly, wildly frustrating. i can remember doing homework and I could not spell potato. She told me to look in the dictionary. That reply frustrated me know end! Why not just tell me how to spell it?

Because she knew that I'd remember if I looked it up, and because being able to look something up is a skill that many of us still struggle with to this day. Sure, it would have been easier for her to spout off p-o-t-a-t-o, but odds are good I'd have bugged her for something else. Sending me to the dictionary taught me to sound out the letters, to search, to discover and gave me a sense of pride in myself when I was able to be successful.

Pretty cool lesson from spelling, and probably more than my teacher had imagined. Now that I'm raising my own family, I find myself teaching similar lessons. After all, I want to raise smart, well adjusted kids who know how to think for themselves and discern the correct path.

Just as my own mom did.

What parallels have you noticed between your parenting style and your mom's? How do you differ?

ŠiStockphoto.com/ alynst

by on May. 9, 2012 at 12:00 AM
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Replies (1-10):
LuvingRN
by on May. 9, 2012 at 1:25 AM
I have found that I tend to have a similar parenting style with the exception of spanking being the first line punishment. I give my kids a warning first, then time out, and if they still didnt listen...then they'll get their bottom smacked.

I also had to do things differently when my stepdaughter lived with us since she was schizophrenic...my mom had to learn from me, LOL!
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mysticalmalissa
by Gold Member on May. 9, 2012 at 7:30 AM

I'm not really sure. 

My Mom passed when I was 13 and with my horrible memory I really dont remember a lot of her in my earlier years.

I learned what NOT to do from my evil step-thing.

MommaNuney
by on May. 9, 2012 at 8:03 AM
1 mom liked this

 My mother was not a very good parent at all. So I basically learned what NOT to be from her and my step-monster.

Audreesmommy757
by Diana on May. 9, 2012 at 8:23 AM

i cant really comment on this using my bio mom but i can use my mil who is the best mom in the world...we kinda have the same parenting tecniques with a few slight differences but i think those are more because shes granny and not mommy...like mac and cheese for breakfast lol...she tends to spoil them...as do i but she has taught me how to be a mom and i learn new things from her everyday

Audreesmommy757
by Diana on May. 9, 2012 at 8:24 AM

 i know how you feel....sorry...hugs!

Quoting MommaNuney:

 My mother was not a very good parent at all. So I basically learned what NOT to be from her and my step-monster.


VisionSeeker
by on May. 9, 2012 at 8:48 AM

Well, my step mom raised me and I do not parent like she does.  She was abusive so I tend to do the direct opposite of her :)

However, my father made the most profound statement to me once as I was complaining about my tween.  He said "Honey, you will continue to be dumb in his eyes for a long time.  When he's about 25 he'll realize that you might have known what you were talking about"

VisionSeeker
by on May. 9, 2012 at 8:49 AM


Quoting Audreesmommy757:

 i know how you feel....sorry...hugs!

Quoting MommaNuney:

 My mother was not a very good parent at all. So I basically learned what NOT to be from her and my step-monster.


I know what you mean about the step-monster thing :(

momkaribg
by on May. 9, 2012 at 9:07 AM
I think I am similar to my mother.
Meltopia529
by on May. 9, 2012 at 9:30 AM

 I have a similar parenting style as my mom

Madelaine
by Bronze Member on May. 9, 2012 at 9:52 AM

very true

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