So
my boy will be 3 in July...and in the last 6 months he's become a holy
terror....and idk what to do about it. He blatantly ignores what i tell
him to do, is always getting into stuff (fridge, cabinets, etc...and i
usually dont believe in child proofing my house, never had to with DD
but ive resorted to that), tells me no, and is just downright bad. I
cant even sit down to feed the baby without him doing something that he
knows will get him in trouble. Now, before anyone says anything, I have
finally gotten my baby (6 weeks) to where I can put him down in his
swing or P&P and do stuff with the kids like reading, coloring,
craft projects, etc...and i just dont get it. My DD was 22 months when
DS was born and she never acted like this...is it a boy thing or what? I
have run out of ideas to punish...timeouts arent effective with him,
spanking doesnt work in my house, he has no toys left to take away and
im just at my wits end....any ideas? Advice? Anything?
Try using a problem solving approach rather than punishment. Since the punishments aren't working DS must not understand the connection between his actions and the punishments you choose. When you problem solve you focus on the problem rather than the child which helps children think objectively about thier actions.
Do some planning with DS. Tell him you're sitting down to feed the baby and it will take about 20 min. Have him decide on 2 or three activities he can do during that time. When he makes a bad choice, address the choice using a natural consequence instead of a punitive one. For example...a child spills juice. Natural consequence= child has no juice to drink. Punitive consequence= child goes to time out.
A natural consequence is directly related to it's action so children are better able to understand what the problem is.
That makes sense...and i think that will work better with my son. Thank you :)...other's POV's bring to light things ive never thought of
Quoting UpSheRises:Try using a problem solving approach rather than punishment. Since the punishments aren't working DS must not understand the connection between his actions and the punishments you choose. When you problem solve you focus on the problem rather than the child which helps children think objectively about thier actions.
Do some planning with DS. Tell him you're sitting down to feed the baby and it will take about 20 min. Have him decide on 2 or three activities he can do during that time. When he makes a bad choice, address the choice using a natural consequence instead of a punitive one. For example...a child spills juice. Natural consequence= child has no juice to drink. Punitive consequence= child goes to time out.
A natural consequence is directly related to it's action so children are better able to understand what the problem is.
I wish I could help. I'm going through similar stuff with my kids. Just all of a sudden, my youngest hits the terrible twos and now ALL three boys are acting out.
It's awful!
Good Luck! <3
I agree! Maybe we both will get good advice...I have no idea how much more of this i can take. Dh is doing warrior forge at work, which is basically basic training for the college rotc cadets, and he has a crazy schedule, so he's not home like normal
Quoting SabrinaLC:I wish I could help. I'm going through similar stuff with my kids. Just all of a sudden, my youngest hits the terrible twos and now ALL three boys are acting out.
It's awful!
Good Luck! <3
I always ask them for a diaper, and/or the wipes. He likes to just sit and hold the baby and look at him, help get/fold his clothes...in a way i wonder if im asking him too much where the baby is concerned? Like today while my DD was napping, we probably read a dozen books and just hung out and hes seeming to act better. He helped clean and vacuum after, and now DD is the one acting out lol
Quoting Althea1315:
He's acting out because of new baby is what it sounds like.. He may need more attention from u. Also, can he help u with the baby.. Like get u a diaper or hold the diaper while u change baby or hold the diaper cream.. He needs to feel more involved/important. And try rewarding his good behavior more often!!
I think hes just acting out for attention. When I started babysitting a few months ago my son did the same thing. Just make sure you're consistent with punishing bad behavior and rewarding the good. He should turn around soon. Good luck
Thank you everyone...i just get so frustrated some days because Im doing everything I can to try pay equal attention to everyone and seems like Im not quite getting it done lol
cold lunch's?!
- missamanda86
on Jun. 19, 2012 at 2:54 PM