Tips for Talking to Your Kids

[Cafe AmyB]

Hi ladies,

Do your kids tell you everything?

Share your thoughts on how to help kids open up. If you can, tell us about a time when you were able to “crack the code” and help your kids through a sticky situation.

[BraeSisk11]

My oldest child 6 is ADHD and she has trouble communicating her wants, needs, and how she is feeling. It is a struggle to get her to open up and talk. However, my 4 year old NEVER stops talking or singing. She is constantly running her mouth.

Would love any ideas on how to get my 6 year old to communicate with us!

[Lindalou907]

I just acknowledge their feelings,and I'm not afraid to tell them when I make a dumb mistake,so they feel free to talk with me.

[wanita61]

I'm not able to 'crack the code'. My 7 year old daughter used to tell me everything when she was in pre-school and kindergarten but these days she often replies "I don't remember" whenever I ask her something.

[mommyof3832]

I ask a lot of questions... Sometimes it works. Getting stuff from my girls is pretty easy. My 10 year boy old not so. But if I'm persistent enough he'll start talking. If its a serious talk and I know he's not being truthful I call his bluff. He's a really bad liar.

[vamaria]

The eye contact part is really critical when kids decide to talk. Looking into your eyes makes communication harder for them, so car rides, cooking, yard work, and other side-by-side activities can make it easier. Also, you could try watching a movie or a television show and talk about it. That way you can talk about the hard stuff, and they can tell you their feelings about the subject without feeling like you put them on the spot. HTH. :)

[Mommyanie]

My daughter talks to me about anything but there are times when things are bugging her and I can tell by her behavior. Sometimes she is extra clingy or she is acting out in someway. When I notice the change in behaior and she hasn't just came to me to talk about it we have a business meeting. In kindergarten her teacher (I forget now why) told my DD that we had to have a business meeting. It just stuck  and it works but I am sure it won't work for much longer because she is 9 and so I am sure I will have to say hey we need to talk. My daughter is open to her feelings to a certain point and then I have to pull it out of her but I tend to be like that myself. Keeping the lines of communication open is very important!!

[LisaSmock]

Don't freak out over stuff when they tell you things you wish you didn't know, I told me mom when I lost me V and she just said "oh" I know she didn't like it but if she had freaked out and locked me in my room that would have been the last time I ever talked to her.

[whisperwhisper]

My daughter isn't old enough for that yet, but I know that I was a very secretive child. I hid everything from everyone and I still tend to do that. I just hope she doesn't turn out like me. :P

[ArmyWifey0412]

My son is similar... He's 11 now, so opening up is ESPECIALLY hard since he's just getting into the hormonal aspects of puberty... Try having ur son draw a pic of something n talk to him while he's doing it... You'd be surprised how much they talk when their main focus is on another task...
As for the truth, I had a LONG talk with DS about 1-2 yrs ago... I said, would u like it if I lied to u? His answer, of course, was no... So I told him to ask me about something that he wanted to know the truth about, & of course he picked Santa, the Tooth Fairy, & the Easter Bunny... So i told him the truth & he REALLY has gotten better at telling the truth since... Granted, he's still having some untruthful moments occasionally, but they've become much fewer & farther btwn...

Hope I helped a bit! ;-)

Quoting mommyluvs2:

I have yet to crack the code f my 8 yr. old he dosen't talk to me unless I cox him into and doing that is like pulling teeth. Any advice that anyone has for me to help wth him plz feel free. I also have an issue with getting him to e truthful so as I said if anyone has any advice plz feel free.

[sweetlyblissful]

No, I don't think my kids tell me everything. Especially my 11 year old. My 6 year old does most of the time. I just hope that they will always feel comfortable to share the important things with me. SO I try to keep things open with them too.