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Parenting Positive Kids Parenting Positive Kids

Whatever happened to "just being nice?"

Posted by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 2:04 PM
  • 10 Replies

My husband and I have always been very blessed. Don't get me wrong, blessed does not mean life has always been easy and it has just been one big happy fest. I just mean that we are extremely fortunate and we want to teach our kids to work hard and have a generous heart. So....

Yesterday, a large crate was delivered with about 50 very large pumpkins to my husbands business. He let all of his employees take as many as they wanted and he even set aside a few for his secretaries who weren't at work on a Sunday. He brought the rest home and let the boys decide what to do with them. The first thing my 4 year old wanted to do was load up his wagon and deliver to our neighbors. We were so happy with this choice that the boys immediately got to work. 

I am appalled that our neighbors, who we have a GREAT relationship with, reacted so oddly. My husband said that everyone asked "how much do we owe you?" or "Why are giving away pumpkins?" or "Is this a school project? What are you doing? What am I going to owe you??" (that one was really weird)

Whatever happened to just smiling and saying thank you?!? Seriously, do you really think a 4 year old and 2 year old have an ulterior motive? They just wanted to be nice! This is not a one time reaction either. We have a large garden and always give away the vegetables that we can't eat and people always want to pay us for it. My friend asked if I still had my potty chair (my 2 year old is already in underwear) and if she could buy it from me. Really? Buy a used potty chair from a friend....WEIRD! She almost acted offended when I said she could just have it, plus the two toilet inserts. 

Am I the odd one here or has society really become that jaded that simply generosity is questioned?

by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 2:04 PM
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Replies (1-10):
SabrinaLC
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:47 PM

They probably didn't mean anything by it.  

It really isn't that often that someone comes by just to give you something.

apoynter
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 7:31 PM
1 mom liked this

   Common courtesy is an endangered species, unfortunately. So many people are 'busy' with themselves, that to see someone else (especially a small child), doing a random act of kindness is an oddity. When someone questions me about something similiar, I just tell them that 'since I've done my good deed for the day, now I can go home and beat my kids'...(WITH A SMILE, OF COURSE.....)  It warms my heart to hear of generous kids....hopefully they will continue to practice good manners, respect and generousity.

 Good for you!

SlightlyPerfect
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Don't let people fool you. Everything they do is by design.
Yesterday at 8:17 AM
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 8:00 PM

That's a tough one, because, for me, whenever I see a child going door to door, I immediately think it's a fundraiser.

Kudos to your kids for choosing to give to others, but I wouldn't be surprised by those reactions. You just have to reassure people it's not for money.

slightlyperfect

isabellah
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 9:21 PM

I am curious about where you live and how much money is in the area.  I live in a very affluent areal and could see people reacting this way.  I have also lived in a very poor area and there sharing and giving and accepting generousity was much more prevalent.





Meltopia529
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 9:24 PM
I agree with this. Good luck

Quoting SlightlyPerfect:

That's a tough one, because, for me, whenever I see a child going door to door, I immediately think it's a fundraiser.

Kudos to your kids for choosing to give to others, but I wouldn't be surprised by those reactions. You just have to reassure people it's not for money.

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hunterskysmom
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 9:28 PM
I think thats great you and your family is like that this world needs alot more ppl in it like you all and you should be one proud mama right now
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NikkiM64
by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 12:59 PM

You have a good point. We live in a very affluent neighborhood. I'm still shocked b/c we give away our leftover vegatables to all of them and they ALL love the boys.... it was just a weird reaction since it is October and most people put pumpkins out anyway. 

Quoting isabellah:

I am curious about where you live and how much money is in the area.  I live in a very affluent areal and could see people reacting this way.  I have also lived in a very poor area and there sharing and giving and accepting generousity was much more prevalent.






elasmimi
by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 5:23 PM

Yes, unfortunately we all are accustomed to the door to door fundraisers. Just smile and say just being neighborly.

Quoting Meltopia529:

I agree with this. Good luck

Quoting SlightlyPerfect:

That's a tough one, because, for me, whenever I see a child going door to door, I immediately think it's a fundraiser.

Kudos to your kids for choosing to give to others, but I wouldn't be surprised by those reactions. You just have to reassure people it's not for money.


BabyTeki
by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 10:53 PM
I think sometimes people feel bad if they don't ask. I always try to at least offer something.
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mysticalmalissa
by Gold Member on Oct. 6, 2012 at 7:47 AM

Yes society has gotten horrible.

There is no such thing as kind gestures anymore, other then maybe opening a door for someone, that goes unquestioned.

We seem to have become overly suspicious of everyones intentions.

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