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Parenting Positive Kids Parenting Positive Kids

Self esteem

Posted by on Oct. 31, 2013 at 10:49 PM
  • 6 Replies
What do you believe causes low self esteem in children? I have two kids. One is extremely outgoing and the other is just shy and reclusive. Her self esteem is so low. I hate to think I've done something to cause this. When she was a toddler/pre schooler, I always thought she would be the outgoing one. Very sure of herself and extremely strong willed. But over the years, she has mellowed out, in a good way but then on the other hand, I just see her being so shy that it is almost paralyzing.

She is 12 - 7th grade.

Tonight I let her go trick or treating with friends for the first time. We passed them on the street and she seemed to be fine. Right in the middle of the action, laughing and having a good time. Then when she got home all heck broke loose. I simply asked if she had fun and she just broke down that no one told her they liked her costume that she hand made and worked so hard on. She said EVERYONE looked at her like she was a freak. WHAT? A freak? I know several people that saw her before she left that told her how amazingly creative she is and that they thought she did a great job. I think she is over exaggerating a bit.

I'm so worried for her. I thought it would be good for her to go with friends because I think she hangs out with us parents way too much and she needs to start being independent a bit. But now she's just mad and I don't even know why??

Any advice or experience here??
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by on Oct. 31, 2013 at 10:49 PM
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Replies (1-6):
hugss
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by on Nov. 1, 2013 at 12:15 AM

Aww hugs to you,
Maybe it is the age/stage?
Hard to believe her frineds were like that .. do you know her fiends?
Hugs to you both :)

momof2ex1
by on Nov. 1, 2013 at 8:25 AM
Oh no not her friends. Her friends (I heard them myself) told her she was 'super cute'. The people she said looked at her 'like a freak' were random strangers. I am sure they didn't do that. We were in the same neighborhood. My 16 year old nephew went with me... And he didn't get any mean or weird looks.

I hope it's just a phase. :/ thanks!!


Quoting hugss:

Aww hugs to you,
Maybe it is the age/stage?
Hard to believe her frineds were like that .. do you know her fiends?
Hugs to you both :)


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
hugss
Report
Take some *Time Out* for You, Join our Friendly/Supportive group :)
Today at 12:38 AM
Time Out For You Group - CafeMom

Need some Time for You? Feeling stressed? Kick back, relax & take a break. If you're a woman who just wants to have fun, here's the place :)

by on Nov. 1, 2013 at 9:43 AM

Sounds like it is them (random strangers) .. older kids maybe?
Hard to understand people these days you know ..

Quoting momof2ex1:

Oh no not her friends. Her friends (I heard them myself) told her she was 'super cute'. The people she said looked at her 'like a freak' were random strangers. I am sure they didn't do that. We were in the same neighborhood. My 16 year old nephew went with me... And he didn't get any mean or weird looks.

I hope it's just a phase. :/ thanks!!


Quoting hugss:

Aww hugs to you,
Maybe it is the age/stage?
Hard to believe her frineds were like that .. do you know her fiends?
Hugs to you both :)



LalaWiley
by on Nov. 1, 2013 at 10:15 AM

Middle school is such a hard time. Kids are struggling to find themselves are are on that borderline between kid and teen. When I was in middle school, I always seemed to interpret things/comments/looks in the negative. While in college, I was able to reconnect with some of my peers from middle school and when I would tell them how their actions/words affected me, they were so surprised because that was not the meaning of their words. They were so surprised that I even took it that way. It was a phase. After middle school, I was less shy, had better esteem. There was more diversity in high school for me. It was easier for me to explore my likes and maybe it was just my high school, but people seemed less judgmental. 

aidensmomma508
by on Nov. 1, 2013 at 10:59 AM

((Hugs))

Janet
by Bronze Member on Nov. 1, 2013 at 11:24 AM

I wouldn't worry. She is at that age. They go through  stages.

hugs

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