I made a post a while ago about a so called friend that made our lives miserable and we brke up ties with her, well this was subject to discussion last night at my house but for the wrong reasons, to start with one of my stepdaughters (the middle one) came out saying that we were mean to this so called friend, that she didnt know why we were like that to her (she said this to her father and me). I was raised old school and taught to respect my elders and when it comes to raise kids I do believe in tough love and to speak with the truth, if you think you're old enough to get into adult situations then you must handle them like an adult.
My SD said that the "so called friend" told her that she did everything on her power to apologize to us and make things better (LIE #1) and then that she kept texting and calling us all summer but we never responded or replied back (LIE #2), in front of her and her father (my hubby) I explained that the so called friend never tried to talk to us nor she apologized or texted or anything at all, I explained to her that she said that to put her against her own father and myself, that there were many reason why we decided not to be friends with this woman anymore, she just went on and on on how bad we were, how mean we were and that is when I lost it and told her that she should be thinking about where her loyalties are, that family comes first and that people like the so called friend not only is lying but also talked $hit about her, about her sisters (my other Sds) about her own mom (my hubby's ex) and she had the nerve to tell me that at least her mother and the so called friend were able to work out their differences and they are such good friends now...my hubby said that the so called friend hated her and that she is becoming friends with their mother just to bother us.
I explained my SD that loyalty to her family comes first especially to her dad, that she owed respect to her father and in my case...well, she is not my blood and it breaks my heart saying this but if she doesn't respect me the way I respected her, if she doesn't have any consideration or care for me even though I showed her that then what can I do?? It hurts me deeply that he considers other people over her own flesh and bloodand shows me a very selfish side of her. I understand that being a teenager she thinks she knows everything but my heart just broke and I felt totally disapointed at her for what she was saying.
She did not only accused us of being bad people, she disrespected us, my hubby give me my place telling her that she can't be going through life showing loyalty to people that doesn't deserve it if while doing it she is disrespecting the family and us.
I wonder if she is so immature she couldn't handle the truth about this so called friend, to the way that she had to disrespect and insults us just to be right on what she was saying...I don't know anymore.
I have been crying out of frustration and sadness since yesterday, I really don't know how to deal with her anymore and my husband is at wit's end with this situation.
Sorry for the vent being too long.