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MAMAS LATINAS MAMAS LATINAS

Six days of hard work.

Posted by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:17 PM
  • 11 Replies

I went to visit my dad last week and spent six days over there. I have been going for about ten months back and fourth helping my family. I am the only one of my parents nine kids that moved away. Every time I go home I feel like I need to do my part and help out as much as possible. This is the problem I feel like all I do is clean and clean. I don't spend quality time with anyone. In fact no one seems to even want to spend time with me just tell me what I need to do. I cleaned my dad's yard for two days. I mean moving mesquite, trimming trees, moving brush to the corner and cleaning house. I buy groceries and buy food for everyone to eat. I had a bad accident this last time. I feel backwards over a huge rock my dad had around a tree and the tree branch cut my back. I went inside to see my back and let everyone know what happened and everyone ignored me. Even my dad did not get up to help me. I always felt bad that I was not there to help out with my mother and now with my dad. Now I think everyone is taking advantage of me and using this for me to fork over money and use me to clean. What do you ladies think? My sister and my two nieces live in my parents home. I feel they should be responsible for my dad and his home. I don't mind helping out, but when it is going to take all my vacation time. Do you think I should spend my vacation time helping take care of my dad?

by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ana326
by Ana-Mexicana on Oct. 11, 2012 at 5:37 PM
I think whoever lives with your dad needs to keep the home clean. Or why don't all the siblings pitch in to hire a maid to go do a deep clean once a week.
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karladiego
by Karla on Oct. 11, 2012 at 5:57 PM

You can help but not do everything. Also you can't feel guilty for not being there or moving out, you really don't need to spend your whole vacation helping your dad, you are the one visiting, it is okay to help around but shouldn't they be making sure that as a guest you are happy there also?

kgmmw
by Kimberly-US/Mex on Oct. 11, 2012 at 8:09 PM
I agree

Quoting ana326:

I think whoever lives with your dad needs to keep the home clean. Or why don't all the siblings pitch in to hire a maid to go do a deep clean once a week.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
twobells
by Orfelinda on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:00 PM
1 mom liked this

I thought everyone was pitching in. When I go I don't see how when everything is a mess. I have four brothers one that is an actual landscaper, but the yard is never done. I just start feeling guilty, now I am getting mad. Even though everyone has good jobs I just don't see them wanting to pitch in for a maid. I go down again at the end of the month and I am going to just sit my ass and do nothing. I want to see what they say.

Quoting ana326:

I think whoever lives with your dad needs to keep the home clean. Or why don't all the siblings pitch in to hire a maid to go do a deep clean once a week.


twobells
by Orfelinda on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:06 PM

A guest I wish! My sister that lives there is real mean. Everyone is scared of telling her something cause she might take it on my dad. I actually tell her off all the time, but I just feel I have to do it for my dad's sake. I just know next time I go I will not do a damn thing. I already had a talk with my dad and told him how I felt. He had nothing to say.

Quoting karladiego:

You can help but not do everything. Also you can't feel guilty for not being there or moving out, you really don't need to spend your whole vacation helping your dad, you are the one visiting, it is okay to help around but shouldn't they be making sure that as a guest you are happy there also?


ana326
by Ana-Mexicana on Oct. 11, 2012 at 11:00 PM
See now that there is some bullshit. They are just being lazy. They are taking advantage of you. I wouldn't do shit next time I went too. Good luck hun.

Quoting twobells:

I thought everyone was pitching in. When I go I don't see how when everything is a mess. I have four brothers one that is an actual landscaper, but the yard is never done. I just start feeling guilty, now I am getting mad. Even though everyone has good jobs I just don't see them wanting to pitch in for a maid. I go down again at the end of the month and I am going to just sit my ass and do nothing. I want to see what they say.


Quoting ana326:

I think whoever lives with your dad needs to keep the home clean. Or why don't all the siblings pitch in to hire a maid to go do a deep clean once a week.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
JCTVCBN
by Marina-Tex-Mex on Oct. 12, 2012 at 9:19 AM

 

Wow, that sucks.

I wonder if they don't do anything because they all know you will come and do it for them.

I do think you should help but not with everything.

I would just do what I think is fair but not spend your entire vacation time there unless you want to of course.

Maybe you could spend some of your time with your dad while you're there.

Is your dad unable to take care of himself?

Maybe your dad feels as though he can't do or say anything.

I wonder how your sister treats him when you leave.

 

 

sophiesmom07
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 9:29 AM

I don't understand how 8 siblings can't help keep the house clean, but expect you to come and do it all.  I would help out, but not make it the sole purpose of my visit, especially when your sister lives there.  I would have had words with her already.  Next time show up, do nothing and take your dad out for coffee.  

Supervane
by Vane on Oct. 12, 2012 at 10:18 AM
If hate to say it, but if you keep doing it no one will step up to the plate and help your parents out
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twobells
by Orfelinda on Oct. 12, 2012 at 6:00 PM

That is my plan. I go back on the 27th and can't wait to see what everyone says. 

Quoting sophiesmom07:

I don't understand how 8 siblings can't help keep the house clean, but expect you to come and do it all.  I would help out, but not make it the sole purpose of my visit, especially when your sister lives there.  I would have had words with her already.  Next time show up, do nothing and take your dad out for coffee.  


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