I feel kinda mean for this, but I don't care... I hope its a girl
My DHs sister finds out what she is having today. I am praying, crossing my fingers everything I can think of to hope she gets a girl. I lost my son 3 weeks ago at 16 weeks pregnant and I know if I find out she is having a boy it will break my heart all over again and any progress I have made towards healing will be gone. I feel mean because I know she really wants a boy really bad but I just want her to have a girl so I don't feel more cheated than I already do. Does that make sense?
IDK just cross your fingers/ pray for me that I get what I need, even if it isn't what I want.
Don't feel bad. I feel the same way. Two people that were pregnant and due around the time I was found out they were having girls (I knew my angel baby was a girl). It devastated me to say the least. Yes, I feel bitter towards them. No, I don't want to read your facebook posts about buying pink stuff.
Just saying we're all here with you. (Hugs)
Don't feel bad. I feel the exact same way about my sis-in-law. I did not want her to have a boy b/c i wanted boys with both of my lost pregnancies. But of course she is having a boy. Ugh!
Quoting rebekahmuse:
Don't feel bad. I feel the same way. Two people that were pregnant and due around the time I was found out they were having girls (I knew my angel baby was a girl). It devastated me to say the least. Yes, I feel bitter towards them. No, I don't want to read your facebook posts about buying pink stuff.
Just saying we're all here with you. (Hugs)
Thanks its nice to know I am not completely nuts for feeling the way I do.
Quoting desperatelyTTC:
Don't feel bad. I feel the exact same way about my sis-in-law. I did not want her to have a boy b/c i wanted boys with both of my lost pregnancies. But of course she is having a boy. Ugh!
thats sucks!! I will be so upset if Ifind out she is having a boy.
I felt the same way when we lost our daughter at 16w. My two bff's were pregnant with me (due 5w before and 6d after) they both got boys.
Don't beat yourself up for feeling that way. We've all been there. I've looked at plenty of people and thought "Now why do YOU deserve to have your baby when I lost mine?" I'm certain that it's all just part of the process and the questioning that we all do after enduring so much....
Just for you I will secretly hope she gets a girl too! *wink*
It's not mean at all. We can't help feeling the way we do. Our loss is enormous!
I'll hope its a girl too!!!! I know that hope and the weight it puts on your heart. My cousin has PCOS like me and she just got pregnant 12 weeks ago so it won't be long before she finds out what she's having... i have a feeling it will be a boy but i soooo hope its a girl. I feel bad for resenting her so much because I know she tried for 2 years but she also never lost any and I did. Oh the mind games we play on ourselves...
What you're feeling is understandable and human. I don't think you are being mean. But I encourage you to focus on YOU versus her. Resentment and jealousy and all those other negative emotions happen. I just hate to see anyone channel their energies into them, for that's wasted energy. I'd rather you channel your energy into yourself and making yourself stronger.
So I will cross my fingers and pray for you in a manner that has nothing to do with your SIL. I pray that you find comfort and peace. I pray that you feel the love of many surrounding you. I pray that God or whatever higher power you believe in will make sure that whatever is the very best for you will happen for you in life. I pray that you feel strong and filled with positive energy. And I say the serenity prayer for you: "God, please grant Catie the serenity to accept what she cannot change, the courage to change what she can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
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- catiedid
on Oct. 15, 2010 at 11:31 AM