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Being there for a friend

Posted by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 6:19 AM
  • 6 Replies
I had my mc in oct at 16w my friend/coworker has been there for me from the day I got preg and since. She has helped when I was upset and has helped me be positive on everything. She has been my rock these last few month when we have been ttc. Well she found out she was preg due like the second week of nov. I was super happy for her this would be her 2nd. Well she went to her ultrasound yesterdat and found out the baby stopped growing and has no hb. She has surgey today to get everything out :( I haven't got to see her but we been texting back and forth I wanna do whatever I can to help her. Right now I'm workin my hours at work and working her last few hours to help for work and I just want to go there and be with her and help her but I don't wanna push myself on her. Any advice on how to help is appreciated. Please pray for my friend.
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by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 6:19 AM
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by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 6:24 AM

So glad to see that you two are such good friends. Just stick by her like she did you and let her know you understand.

by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 6:36 AM
Thank and that's my plan. It just hard I feel like I caused it even though I didn't.
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by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 8:20 AM

 Maybe call or text her asking if you can go see her and maybe take her cookies or something sweet, she knows you've been there and you of all people will understand what she's going through. so tell her when you see her that your there for her and when she's ready to talk your waiting. Give lots of hugs. that helped me alot i loved hugs!!

Jessica & Matthew, Together since 2/9/03, Married since 6/30/06, Angel baby # 1 9/4/08, Son Brady born 11/6/09, Angel baby # 2 11/17/10, Angel baby # 3 3/2/11.

by on Apr. 14, 2011 at 3:21 PM

Offer her company and support. Some women really want the comfort of having loved ones around; others like solitude. But it's always nice to be offered that in-person care.

Bring her food (perhaps a meal that will stretch for a couple of days). If she wants your company, you can bring it by when you visit. Otherwise, you can drop it off (maybe let her know and coordinate to drop off when her SO can accept?).

An inspirational/comforting card and book can also help to ease her sorrow. And some women love receiving something that honors their babies.

Take care.

by Silver Member on Apr. 14, 2011 at 5:26 PM

 Its wonderful that you are so dedicated and have such a dedicated friend in return. You do know how she is feeling right now and that will bring you closer together but also remember everyone grieves differently. While some of us want support right away others want to crawl away ina dark room for a few days and hide. Sometimes teh best thing to do is just to ask her what she needs from you. Let her know youa re there for her anytime and remind her just how incredibly grateful you were to have her support when you went through this. Remember that miscarriage is not only taxing on us emotionally but also physically and offer her some ways to help her and care for her as she copes with that.

by Amy on Apr. 14, 2011 at 6:59 PM

I agree with the other ladies maybe give her a call and let her know your there if she wants to talk or just needs someone to hang out with. 

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