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Just needing to share my feelings. (pregnancy mentioned)

Posted by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:33 PM
  • 6 Replies

Sorry I haven't been on here in a while, because I found out that I became pregnant again back in June, which is the month Noah was due. I wasn't prepared, I wanted to wait at least 1 year before tyring again. Anyway that's not how it worked out. We are happy, but I find myself growing more and more nervous as we get closer to the 15 week mark which is when Noah died, however we didn't know that until I was supposed to be 18 weeks along. I still miss him terribly, and I have my moments when I cry. With this baby I just keeping thinking its dead. Every Time I go in for an appointment, I feel surprised that my baby is still alive. I have had 3 appointment so far one at 8w6d to find out how far along I was. The next one was a first trimester screen with ultrasound baby was supposed to 12w 1d baby was measuring 12w 6d. and the last appointment was on Tuesday and I was 12w 6d and baby's heartbeat was 176, my OB said everything is looking really good. I want to be happy and let myself totally fall head over heels for this baby. But I still feel like it going to be on borrowed time. Like its just going to end before we get to meet. 

I know that there are many who would like to be where I am now. I am happy to be here just afraid of being crushed again! Thanks for reading, just wanted to share.

by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:33 PM
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Replies (1-6):
cindy82
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:43 PM
I totally understand and feel free to vent. Every moment is terrifying until u have that little one in your arms. Good luck.
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mommyofnoah208
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:49 PM
It is really hard and stressful to be pregnant after a loss. Those blissful feelings of becoming pregnant means you get to bring a baby home has been taken from you. You just gotta take it day by day and at each milestone you pass celebrate. Good luck and i hope things continue to go well and you become more and more confident with your pregnancy. Always feel free to share your feelings, also you are welcome to join Pregnancy after Loss as well if you would feel more comfortable talking about your pregnancy there. Thinking of you and good lick!
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mommyofnoah208
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:49 PM
* luck... Not lick... Sorry i am on my itouch
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marsh48433
by Lisa, Michigan mom on Sep. 14, 2011 at 5:23 PM

Congrats and don't apologize for how you're feeling.  I think it's completely normal!  I felt this way about my last pregnancy (m/c).  I just couldn't attach because I was fearful.  My husband finally convinced me to and we did end up miscarrying but I don't regret it.  I think it's what helped me cope with yet another m/c.  My husband's advice......new pregnancy, new outcome! 

Take it one day at a time and stay as positive as you can!!  HUGS!

cali_angel_girl
by Amy on Sep. 14, 2011 at 6:00 PM

((hugs)) the way your feeling is totally normal hun and I know how scary it can be to be pregnant after a loss.  But you just gotta do your best to take things day by day and stay positive. 

happymommy42008
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 11:29 PM

Thank you all for your kind and motivating words! It really does mean so much to me!

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