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had d&c today, angry with the world...

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:14 PM
  • 7 Replies

so I had my d&c today and am having a lot of cramping pain and bleeding. i woke up in the recovery room crying hysterically (first time i've actually cried since i got the news monday). it just finally set in that my baby is gone. this is my second miscarriage. yes, I have a beautiful 4 year old daughter that God has blessed me with, so why am I so angry with Him right now? I feel like every time you turn on the news you hear a story of a baby being left for dead in a garbage can, babies being shaken to death, beaten, raped, abused, and left unloved. And I'm not trying to feel sorry for myself, but why isn't God taking these babies who are being born into such terrible circumstances without a fighting chance to begin with instead of my babies who would be genuinely loved and cared for and treated like the princes/princesses they are meant to. I'm sorry ladies, I'm just so angry and I don't know where to aim this anger and I feel like I'm looking for answers where there are none to be found. God bless you all.

by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:14 PM
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Replies (1-7):
mommyofnoah208
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:36 PM

 So sorry :( very heartbreaking and so hard to get through. It is so difficult to even think about why we loose our babies when we want them so badly. Praying that you find peace. It is ok to be angry it is very natural part of grieving. Thinking of you

ashtie
by Ashten on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:41 PM
Im so sorry for your loss, and I know the pain after a d&c...
sending tons of hugs and prayers your way. We are all here for you, and its ok to be angry with god, he will love you anyway
lunabella79
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 11:03 PM
I am so very sorry that you have to go through any of this right now. We have all been at that stage of our grief where we hate the world and question our faith. I was telling a friend just yesterday that I really believe that no God does these things, in other words he doesn't control every little thing like people getting sick etc. He's there for support and love, he's there to take care of those that have passed, but he doesn't hurt us on purpose. Now I'm not Christian, but I do believe in a God whoever that may be, and I do believe that our angels are always w/us, I also believe that God does answer prayers, but he just can't answer them all all the time.
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lunabella79
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 11:04 PM
I meant to add that I hope you start feeling better **hugs**
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eak24
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 12:04 AM

Im so sorry for your loss and can completely understand your anger. I had only had one miscarriage and have a wonderful three yr old but after I got the news I was really upset and angry too. I had a friend that drank and smoked the whole time she was pregnant and had a health baby and I do everything right. Not drink, only drink water, took my vitamin, and I had a miscarriage. I know I did nothing wrong and had to stop feeling sorry for myself and know that god has a plan for me and I was just not ready to have another baby. I just have to look forward and hope for that wonderful news that Im having another.

juniper918
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 4:03 AM

I lost twins in 2008. One of the hardest things I've ever dealt with. I understand how you feel- but to answer your questions God isn't taking your baby- he is recieving your baby. Can God control everything yes- but we don't live in a perfect world- He doesnt claim it to be free of pain- some of the people in the Bible experienced so much trial and pain.
It's hard I know it is- it was a long and painful process for me to go through. Praying for you to be supported, and have strength, encouragement and peace during this time.


marsh48433
by Lisa, Michigan mom on Nov. 10, 2011 at 7:48 AM

I am so sorry for your losses!  I have a lot of anger still, I just don't understand it.  After while it does start to subside but then you hear those horrible stories and it brings it all up again.  The reasons why we aren't allowed to have our babies and those who mistreat can have many babies and have them without care I will never understand.  I don't think there's a person out there that can explain it to me in a way that I will comprehend.  Hoping & praying you find some peace and comfort in the days ahead!!  HUGS!

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