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I need to talk

Posted by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 12:11 AM
  • 10 Replies

 After losing our son I have been devastated it has been the worse two months of my life and to top it all off my husband as went back to abusing drugs. I just feel lost and confused and I don't know where to turn. We moved almost 4 hours away from all of our family and friends so that he could get away from all of the drugs this was before I got pregnant and now he is on them again. He has made it very clear that if I talk to anyone here about his drug use that he will leave so I feel stuck. I moved here and left my job the only one I had that would support me and my now six year old son. I have no job and no income so it's just not that easy for me to leave now. Plus in my emotional state after losing my son at 34 weeks pregnant I don't know if I could even hold down a normal job.

I so miss all my friend and having someone to talk to... I am so sick of worrying and crying over things that I know I should not be crying over...

I am just praying that God will anwser my prayers and that my baby did not die in vain......


by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 12:11 AM
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by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 12:19 AM
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Oh hun im so sorry for your loss. I wish there was something I could do. My prayers are with you. I pray for you to have strength my friend. There is a light even through all your dark times. Im here to listen. Dont ever think that your child died in vain he is Gods Angel!! Take some time to breathe. You are a strong woman remember that!!♥ I know this doesnt make things any easier or any better but also know you are not alone.
by Lisa, Michigan mom on Dec. 3, 2011 at 7:49 AM

Awe hun, I am so sorry! It's horrible enough to deal with this painful, emotional ordeal but then to have to deal with no support from family & friends, I am so sorry!  I wish there was some advice I could give you to help heal your pain.  I will be praying for you in the days ahead!  Keep your chin up, you're a strong woman and you can get through this!  HUGS!

by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 10:03 AM
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I am so sorry for your loss and all that you are going through right now.  :(  Have you thought about seeking counseling to help with your grief with the pregnancy loss and also with your DH's habit?  Do you have family/friends that you could get some advice/support from?  I will keep you in my prayers and please know that God is with you during these difficult times!  We are also here for you!  Please PM me if you would like to talk further.  HUGS!


So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.   Isaiah 41:10


"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Matthew 11:28

by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 10:06 AM

 Jesus and children

This is what I picture in Heaven.  Our babies are safe in Jesus' loving arms!  Take comfort in that. :)

by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 10:19 AM
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I don't know you personally, but coming from a family where alcohol and drug abuse were common and I understand. I don't know your parents but as a mom I would want you to come home so I could hold you and care for you....shoot I want to do that for you and your not mine. I understand your DH has probably turned back to drugs to kill the pain, but he doesn't have the right to say he will leave if you talk about it. You should seek as much support and help that you need, both of you should. Take a deep breath, say a prayer (if you pray) and then you decide what is.BEST for you and your son. Also, your baby did not die in vain! I don't know why God does what he does sometimes to be honest, but I still believe.
Please, please take care!

Hugs and if you want pm me
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by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 10:36 AM
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My heart is hurting for you! I agree with the other ladies, your child did not die in vain. He knew that you loved him unconditionally and he knows that you are hurting. As for your husband, he is using drugs to hide the pain and i suggest you both find some kind of counceling in dealing with your loss together and with his drug abuse. You have tonthink about your six year old as well, do you want him to think about his daddy as a drug abuser or a caring man? I would also may think about moving back home to be close to your family and friends cause thats what you need right now is to be sheltered in love and family. God only hands us what we can handle, and maybe this is a sign that you and your husband both need counceling to make your marriage stronger.
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers! And never think that your son died in vain, because now he is an angel looking down on you and your family. I lost my daugter to heart complications at 32 weeks, three weeks ago. And i always think that she is not in pain because otherwise she would have had to have surgeries throughout her life just to keep her alive, and i wouldnt want to put her through that. Just keep thinking he is happy and he is playing with all of the other angels that god took from this group. If you need to ever talk, im always here!

I hope this helps!
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 2:51 PM

 Thank you all so much... I am looking for a faith based counselorto start seeing. I know that I need to find someone who can help me get though this. I just really thought that by moving here and getting away from everyone who does drugs back home that my husband would get a new start. That we all would get a new start, and in many ways we have. Parts of my life are so much better because I am here. Like my husbands job here allows for me to stay home with my son. Where if we moved back I would have to go back to work and I don't know if I can do that either, not in the shape I am in right now. There are so many days still that I can barely bring myself to get out of bed to get my little one off to school.

Again Thank you for your kind words and please keep my family in your prayers because with out God helping us I don't know how we will make it through this.

by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 1:11 AM

I pray that you are strengthened in this tough time. My heart truly goes out to you. Indeed God is helping you through this and counseling will be good for you to have someone to talk to and vent to but like most of the ladies here said we are here for you. I thank God that I found this site last month. God bless you and your family!!!! Everything will be alright.

by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 7:09 AM

I am praying for you God will come through for you and your family. As far as Faith Based Counseling I would check with a church in your area. I know where I llive our only hope of Christian or any faith based counseling is at the churchs. But with that said I also live in the 3rd least churched stated in the USA.

by on Dec. 5, 2011 at 4:59 PM

I am praying for you, too. And please, please reach out to your family for support/a place to stay, if necessary. And I hope that you and your husband get the counseling you need.

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