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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support
I opened a post in the ttc group. It was in the pregnancy after ttc forum but it came up when I openned the group. I looked because it said gender scan today, I love seeing what everyone is having. This so happened to be posted by someone from my due date group that I was in. I lost my baby at 11w and it hurts everyday. She found out she is having another boy and her word were another nasty boy. What a selfish, horrid thing to say about your baby. I would be 20w tomorrow and finding out what my baby was soon. It breaks my heart to see things like this. How can women be so hateful and mean to their child. I just needed to get that out.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 21, 2012 at 9:50 PM
Replies (31-40):
sarahtessa
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:00 PM
I said that when I lost Angelica... But I honestly feel like complaining about my heartburn doesn't make me any less grateful for my miracle baby or make me a bad mom. In fact, complaining about heartburn and my continued morning sickness helps take my mind off the fear of losing this baby.

Also I know what DDG you are talking about and which momma posted in TTC.

The whole situation is disgusting and reprehensible. :( I'm having a hard time staying in that group now. The fact that this woman has many people who support her comments is even more disgusting.....


Quoting mama91605:

I left the preg group and my dd group as soon as I found out. But I am still in the ttc group. I know what you mean though, I will never complain about anything if I get prego again




Quoting DarksMama:

I dunno about OP, but I was supposed to be 11/17/12. I left my DDG and  the preggo board as soon as I knew something was wrong. Couldn't sit around watching them bitch about all the things I'd love to be 'suffering'.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
sarahtessa
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:02 PM
This momma has had a recent miscarriage herself... Just last October if I remember correctly, which is what makes it even more upsetting :(

Quoting Ashleysnicholas:

People who havent gone through loss just don't get it. I wish I were that naive again. I'm sorry you saw that.
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sarahtessa
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:03 PM
I did report it; I don't think anything was done.

Quoting lovemyhoney19:

Wow I can't believe that!! I would totally report her that's offensive and mean as hell.
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braezmommy89
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:04 PM
1 mom liked this
Some people are just.....heartless?

Keep your head up mamma and dont let the negativity bring you down in your journey to concieve a LO...
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sarahtessa
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:06 PM
Thank you for your reply to that post. I hope that put things into perspective for her.

Quoting LilysMommy813:

That was in the DDG not the ttc group, she posted there as well



Quoting mama91605:

I didn't see that. All I have to say is how sad.



Quoting LilysMommy813:

The thing that upset me was she said " help me want this baby inside me" just because it was a boy, being disappointed, ok I get it, but damn those are some harsh words




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mama91605
by Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:15 PM
I am glad I haven't seen the post in the dd group. I don't think I could handle it. It is just disgusting.

Anyway, how are things going for you. I hope all is well. Do you know what you are having.


Quoting sarahtessa:

I said that when I lost Angelica... But I honestly feel like complaining about my heartburn doesn't make me any less grateful for my miracle baby or make me a bad mom. In fact, complaining about heartburn and my continued morning sickness helps take my mind off the fear of losing this baby.



Also I know what DDG you are talking about and which momma posted in TTC.



The whole situation is disgusting and reprehensible. :( I'm having a hard time staying in that group now. The fact that this woman has many people who support her comments is even more disgusting.....




Quoting mama91605:

I left the preg group and my dd group as soon as I found out. But I am still in the ttc group. I know what you mean though, I will never complain about anything if I get prego again






Quoting DarksMama:

I dunno about OP, but I was supposed to be 11/17/12. I left my DDG and  the preggo board as soon as I knew something was wrong. Couldn't sit around watching them bitch about all the things I'd love to be 'suffering'.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Safrianna
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:17 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh my gosh. I saw this post as well, and was shocked by her calling her child nasty. That is so horrible. I would love to have a boy. I would love it if all of my children were boys. I have no children, other than my little girl who is gone forever. I wanted a boy first, but I would gladly GLADLY have had her healthy and be my first. I couldn't be disappointed either way.

Chillisarah
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:21 PM

I just wanted to say so sorry for your loss. 

I also wanted to mention that as someone who has had two miscarriages, has a ds and a dd, and never experienced gender disappointment..I can understand why a hormonal women would say such a thing.  Not really defending her..but every pregnancy I "was not myself" .  I could look back on some things I said or did and think, "wow, that was not me..who was that?".  Hormones are powerful and couple that with gender disappontment and some women might say some things they don't mean.(and I don't judge gender disappointment because I think it is normal, ok, and women get over it fairly quickly) ie. it's the hormones talkin for the most part and I take it with a grain of salt. I agree that it's not really "appropriate" to vent in a ttc group about gender disappointment.   We have Cafemom journals to vent in and other groups for sure. 

sarahtessa
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 2:24 PM
I'm still super nervous :/ as much as the heartburn and extreme nausea suck, it gives me relief to know I'm sick. Somehow I equate that with a healthy pregnancy. Our anatomy scan is scheduled for 5/10. I can't wait, but last appointment we discovered I have an anterior placenta, which is why I don't feel baby a lot. I have a momma's hunch that this baby is a girl --- yes, ANOTHER girl --- and a gender maker test confirmed my hunched. Can't wait to verify with ultrasound. We are just so thankful to have a healthy baby <3
Thanks for asking. :)


Quoting mama91605:

I am glad I haven't seen the post in the dd group. I don't think I could handle it. It is just disgusting.



Anyway, how are things going for you. I hope all is well. Do you know what you are having.




Quoting sarahtessa:

I said that when I lost Angelica... But I honestly feel like complaining about my heartburn doesn't make me any less grateful for my miracle baby or make me a bad mom. In fact, complaining about heartburn and my continued morning sickness helps take my mind off the fear of losing this baby.





Also I know what DDG you are talking about and which momma posted in TTC.





The whole situation is disgusting and reprehensible. :( I'm having a hard time staying in that group now. The fact that this woman has many people who support her comments is even more disgusting.....






Quoting mama91605:

I left the preg group and my dd group as soon as I found out. But I am still in the ttc group. I know what you mean though, I will never complain about anything if I get prego again








Quoting DarksMama:

I dunno about OP, but I was supposed to be 11/17/12. I left my DDG and  the preggo board as soon as I knew something was wrong. Couldn't sit around watching them bitch about all the things I'd love to be 'suffering'.



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busyizzybsmom
by Betsy on Apr. 22, 2012 at 4:50 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree - I don't think there's anything wrong with talking about how uncomfortable you are! I draw the line though at saying anything like, "I hate this!" or "I hate being pregnant!" as the alternative is obviously to *not* be pregnant which is obviously (hopefully!) not what any of us would want. I did start saying toward the end though that I couldn't wait till he was born - I was careful not to say that I couldn't wait till it was over though...that seemed to be borderline too. I just never wanted to be or appear to be ungrateful for the life inside of me, despite the trials that I may have to go through to bring them into the world.

This whole thing is so frustrating - she's griping in another group about some of the comments she's received and I'm having a really hard time not butting in. Yes, obviously, everybody in her ddg is hormonal and all, but she should *realize* that she's hormonal and keep her hormonal reactions to herself. Yes she's hormonal and it's probably mostly just the hormones talking, but that's still no excuse for vocalizing such nasty things about your own child!

Quoting sarahtessa:

I said that when I lost Angelica... But I honestly feel like complaining about my heartburn doesn't make me any less grateful for my miracle baby or make me a bad mom. In fact, complaining about heartburn and my continued morning sickness helps take my mind off the fear of losing this baby.

Also I know what DDG you are talking about and which momma posted in TTC.

The whole situation is disgusting and reprehensible. :( I'm having a hard time staying in that group now. The fact that this woman has many people who support her comments is even more disgusting..... 
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