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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

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blessedmommie07
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My life is busy and I love it!
Yesterday at 11:36 PM
Posted by on May. 7, 2012 at 4:09 PM
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Went to church yesterday.  Went alright I really needed to go.  And it was testmony day (which is first sunday of every month) where anyone that wants to share the testmony of the lord can go up and it just seemed most were talking about losses and getting through it.  I felt like it was all aimed at me and probably why I felt I needed to go to church.  It was hard though especially because there seemed to be a few newborn baby girls and I teared up a bit in church.

And William (my 5 yr old) isn't taking it so well.  Ever since we have came home he has had nightmares about Isabelle passing away and he isn't sleeping well.  He is doing so great at expressing his feelings to us but it hurts to see him so depressed and down.  He won't come to us when he has the nightmares he just curls up on a chair or in the living room on the couch and wimpers or just lays there.  We just have no idea how to help him and I can't get him into counseling or child grief support groups because in less than 2 weeks he is going to his bio dad's for 2 1/2 months.  I worry about that too especially because he is taking Isabelle's passing so hard.  The Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep photographer sent me a few photos for the funeral and luckily one was of William kissing Isabelle and I showed it to him and he loved it.  So I put it in a frame for William and he put it in his room by his bed.  I just wish I could do more for him.

This morning we went to the funeral home and made all the final arrangments to put her in a National Cemetery since my DH just got out of active duty.  Having Isabelle at the National Cemetery makes it all free and they reserved two spots for me and DH as well so whenever we pass we can be with her.  I thought that was amazing because I would hate for her to be alone.  I was a little sad there but I did well.  But then when we were leaving we passed a church that had a funeral procession and I just stopped talking to DH (while in our car) and started to cry a little.  Mainly because we are going to have a procession to the cemetery, not sure why the funeral home wanted to do that but we were okay with that.  And then we went to a mall to pick out nice shirts for our boys and DH to wear on friday.  I didn't want us to really wear all black because that just looks more depressing and sometimes what you wear affects your moods especially on emotional days so I decided it would be nice for us all to wear blue.  Because DH would never let me put the boys in anything pink :)

by on May. 7, 2012 at 4:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MiriRose923
by on May. 7, 2012 at 4:30 PM
2 moms liked this

I'm so sorry for your loss, my heart goes out to you and your family.  It's encouraging to know you were able to attend church and you felt like it was a service you were meant to attend -- God always knows how to meet us where we're at, doesn't He?  I'm praying for you.  I work at Focus on the Family, and they offer some materials on grief and loss for children that you might want to check out.  Their website also offers some articles on this topic.  Hope this helps in some small way.  God bless you!

emilysingleton
by on May. 7, 2012 at 4:32 PM

I'm praying for your family

mommyofnoah208
by Melissa on May. 7, 2012 at 4:47 PM

 I am so sorry. I am glad you are able to get out to church and make arrangements. I hope the change in scenery will help your son, thinking and praying for you and your family through all of this.

tinyfootprint
by on May. 7, 2012 at 6:51 PM
Im thinking of you....I think that is very sweet that she will be next one of you someday...my son is buried in a baby cemetery and it makes me smile knowing he is around other little angels....God Bless their little souls
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beach_babies
by on May. 7, 2012 at 6:51 PM
I can't imagine your pain. Maybe your sons father would take him to some grief sessions. I don't know your relationship with him, but talk to him if you can and explain what is happening with ya'lls son. Hugs
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blessedmommie07
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My life is busy and I love it!
Yesterday at 11:36 PM
by Desiree on May. 7, 2012 at 8:08 PM

Thank you.  I have emailed his father and he said he would look into it.  But we'll see whether he follows through with it and I really hope he does.

Quoting beach_babies:

I can't imagine your pain. Maybe your sons father would take him to some grief sessions. I don't know your relationship with him, but talk to him if you can and explain what is happening with ya'lls son. Hugs


busyizzybsmom
by Betsy on May. 7, 2012 at 8:58 PM
Hugs, Momma. I can't imagine all that you're going through. Still praying for you all!
tts
by Tara on May. 7, 2012 at 9:45 PM

Praying for you every night as I lay my head on my pillow.  My heart just aches for you and your family.. your sweet little boy.  It hurts so much to see our innocent little children go through so much pain.  I know how hard it was for my little ones when I lost my baby. ..  another idea (which you may already be doing).. is to pray for Isabelle every night with your little boy..  I know for me, in the middle of the worst moments of my life, God has never left me and praying is the only thing to help me get through it. 



alanasmumma
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:48 PM

I think not wearing black is a good idea. My friend was murdered in Feb and we all decided to wear her favorite color to her funeral instead of black- we all wore bright pink. It just didn't seem right to wear black since we wanted to celebrate her life and the time we had with her. Have you looked up ways to help your son online? There might be something out there that someone else has done at home and been helpful.

Ashleysnicholas
by Ashley on May. 7, 2012 at 11:06 PM
I am so sorry. These have got to be the oughest days. Hang in there friend. Thinking and praying for you.
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