Oh man....I was at a seminar this morning and the guest speaker was getting everyone involved in the theories of Carl Rogers and the actual self (who you really are) vs. the ideal self (who you would like to be). People were commenting on being friendly saying how it's rude not to smile back at someone even if you don't know them and so i raised my hand suggesting that perhaps some people are undergoing something traumatic and therefore are not living up to their ideal self for good reasons and i said "I lost someone recently so being freindly is not really an option". The guest speaker agreed with me but while saying my statement i started to cry.
Of course, no one there knew of my loss and i did not specify baby in the phrasing but i really thought i could comment without loosing it and there i was sobbing. I quickly exsused myself but seriously? Crying like that in public with everyone staring at me? WTF is that? I am so embarassed and ashamed.