Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

will this pain ever get better(preg mentioned)

Posted by on Jul. 10, 2012 at 12:58 AM
  • 5 Replies

Today was a really rough day.. Tim's(husband) dad came over and we started talking about the family getting together to go see Christopher to celebrate his birthday.. I've cried since he left.. I shouldn't be celebrating his birthday at a cemetery, I should be throwing a party for him, he should be running around and laughing. He should be blowing out candles... I've tried so long to be so strong but sometimes it just gets hard and i find the pain is just all too real.. I know he is a a better place but that doesn't stop me from wanting him right here in my arms. I miss you Son, and I will always miss you.. He will be three on Saturday!! Will this ever get easier? I am currently 13weeks pregnant with our final child and  find it hard to enjoy it because all I keep thinking is if this is a boy will I feel like I've replaced my son? I just want the pain to ease.. It's been 3yrs and it still feels like yesterday that i gave birth to my stillborn son..

by on Jul. 10, 2012 at 12:58 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-5):
by on Jul. 10, 2012 at 1:21 AM
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jul. 10, 2012 at 1:29 AM
1 mom liked this

Aww Hun, I'm so sorry you are going through this pain.  I am very new in this process, my baby was born at 16 weeks, that was 4 weeks ago...on June 9th.  I want Avery here too, but I know he is walking with the Lord now, and we will meet again.  We definitly want another and if it's a boy...and with our ratio, with Avery 5 boys 1 girl ;)  we will most likely have another's never replacing him, just growing our family. 

Celebrate little Christopher, it honors his life.  I want to find a positive way to honor Avery, each June 9th.  Something we can actively do together as a family, to give back to others, in Avery's name.  I praying God gives you peace (((Hugs)))

by Silver Member on Jul. 10, 2012 at 8:11 PM

  My son that was stillborn was born in January, on the 21st he would be 6 months old and instead I am trying to figure out how honor him... I can't say celebrate, I don't want ot celebrate, he isn't here to celebrate....

I am also 13 weeks (tomorrow) pregnant and this baby is due 3 days before Ryder was due, well this baby is actually due on the 21st, the day that Ryder was born sleeping. But that is really hard to tell people so we are just oging by the first date that is the 17th. But they are inducing early... But I keep wondering how do I honor Ryder when I am already going to have another baby? esp. if its a boy which I have a strong feeling it is??

I am so sorry for your loss sweetie. I know your pain and it sucks. Hugs and prayers as you are preparing for this very difficult time.

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers /">Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
Daisypath Anniversary tickers
by on Jul. 10, 2012 at 8:35 PM
I lost my son at 17 weeks and I am 6 weeks pregnant ....I am also due in march..the same month exactly a year after I lost joshua...I feel like my new baby will be a way of honoring him alone...joshua gave me strength to continue to live for my two living children through my such heartache and see the beauty in every second of life....good luck ladies
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jul. 11, 2012 at 11:23 AM

My heart just aches for you, firelily90.  You have come to the right place to receive love and support.  I am so sorry that you are feeling so much sadness and pain like it was just yesterday instead of three years ago. 

It is obvious that Christopher will always have a very special place in your heart.  I can only imagine all the feelings and emotions you are experiencing now that you are pregnant again with your last child and wondering if he is going to be a boy.  I wish I could give you a big hug.  When I miscarried a number of years ago, it left a big hole.  I also have some very close friends who have been where you are.  I do understand the process of working through what we are feeling.  Honoring your child in a distinctive way can be so helpful along with getting involved in a grief support group.

Have you heard of Angie and Todd Smith who lost their daughter, Audrey shortly after she was born?  Todd is part of the music group, Selah.  Todd and his wife have a blog that you might find beneficial to read.  I warn you that you will need lots of kleenex when you read their story.  I only share this thinking that it will resonate with you because you know where they are coming from.  I know that it touched me profoundly with what I was going through.  You might want to check out Hannah's Prayer Ministries too.  They suggest a book, "Grieving the Child I Never Knew" by Kathe Wunnenberg.  I wanted to be able to reach out to you in some way -- I hope this helps!

Take care of yourself.  I will be praying for healing as you prepare for your new baby.  Blessings to you and your family!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)