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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

ok now im feeling guilty

Posted by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 9:41 PM
  • 4 Replies

i just posted in the TTC group how excited i was for DH coming home in Dec. and how we have this one night all planned out for our annver. we are going to have our first really romantic night since we had kids. but now im starting to feel really guilty. we want another baby and so of course while he is home we are going to try for one. i dont like this feeling. and its not just a little guilt, i feel like i shouldnt even try yet. like im just pushing the death of my daughter aside. how do i get over this guilt? it makes me feel like a really bad mom cause im already wanting another baby and it hasnt even been 2 months since we lost our daughter. i talk and write about her alot. im always thinking about her. is this guilt feeling ever going to go away? 

Wife to Donald for 5 yrs (Annver. 12/30) and mommy to 6!

Hubby comes home Dec. 23rd!! Cant wait!!

Jason 6, Alexis 4 1/2, Catelynn 2 1/2, Ethan 1 1/2 and 2 angels. Baby Fletcher lost to MC 11/13/11 and Makayla lost to premature labor at 24 weeks 5 days 08/17/12 - 08/21/12

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

You may have left my arms but you will never leave my heart! 

Lilypie Trying to Conceive Event tickers
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 9:41 PM
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Replies (1-4):
blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Oct. 13, 2012 at 10:48 PM

*Hugs* I'm sorry you have guilt.  Just don't focus on concieving but just you and your DH sharing your love together.  I never really had guilt but DH did that is why even if we could have tried sooner he didn't want to.  Because he felt that it would be replacing our daughter.  But just remember you'll never replace her.  She will still have a place in your heart.  I know that I fill uncomplete and like our family is just waiting for one more since our one more should have been Isabelle.  

luvbeinamommy68
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 11:24 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting blessedmommie07:

*Hugs* I'm sorry you have guilt.  Just don't focus on concieving but just you and your DH sharing your love together.  I never really had guilt but DH did that is why even if we could have tried sooner he didn't want to.  Because he felt that it would be replacing our daughter.  But just remember you'll never replace her.  She will still have a place in your heart.  I know that I fill uncomplete and like our family is just waiting for one more since our one more should have been Isabelle.  

excatly! my family just doesnt feel complete. :( i dont know, it just like hit me. i have been doing everything i can to make my body be in better shape. its like Makayla's death was a real wake up call and i am trying to get healthier for the next baby. thats a good idea though. im going to try my hardest not to think about concieving. hopfully we will be to busy having a good annver. to think about it. :)

Wife to Donald for 5 yrs (Annver. 12/30) and mommy to 6!

Hubby comes home Dec. 23rd!! Cant wait!!

Jason 6, Alexis 4 1/2, Catelynn 2 1/2, Ethan 1 1/2 and 2 angels. Baby Fletcher lost to MC 11/13/11 and Makayla lost to premature labor at 24 weeks 5 days 08/17/12 - 08/21/12

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

You may have left my arms but you will never leave my heart! 

Lilypie Trying to Conceive Event tickers
mommyofnoah208
by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 6:46 AM
I am sorry you are feeling this, I think it is normal to feel these type of things...getting pregnant after a loss is emotional. But you really don't need to feel it, you can still want to have another baby and and grieve your daughter at the same time..you are not replacing her or forgetting about her, you are adding to the love of your family. Good luck!
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Angela4boys
by Angela on Oct. 14, 2012 at 8:19 AM

My feeling is, you want another baby, but that doesn't lesson the loss of your Angel.  She would not want you suffering/grieving/in pain.  You do not need to feel guilty because you want to grow your family! 

We wanted another baby, so we concieved Avery, losing him hurt so much, and we wish he were here, but he isn't, and we still want another baby.  It doesn't minimize his loss, it doesn't make us love him less...but we want to grow our family. 

It's ok Mama.  It's ok to move on in life...it's not dishonoring your Angel.  (((hugs)))




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