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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

im not a mom, shut up!

Posted by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:15 AM
  • 8 Replies

I don't feel like it, they say "well you did conceive but the pregnancy just so happened to end early"  So how does this make me a mom ? I have no baby anymore..im not going to be acknowledged on mothers day .. I feel so sad , i would of been 7months today.

by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:15 AM
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Replies (1-8):
blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:21 AM
1 mom liked this

You are a mom.  You had a baby growing inside of you.  *Hugs*

Zealand2008
by Bronze Member on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:48 AM
I felt like a mom the moment I saw the heart beat but we are all different and feel things differently. You need to feel what you feel but remember that people don't say those things to be mean. They care and are trying their best to comfort you. They just don't know how.
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trustgod103
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:55 AM

I know and thank you! I just feel so much guilt because I didn't know i was and maybe i could have prevented it.. but god knows whats best :)

Irene1923
by Tina on Nov. 30, 2012 at 1:55 PM
As Zealand said, there is no right or wrong way to feel. And though hurtful, those comments were probably made to comfort you. My family, through their caring and want to help, said things that to them were meant to ease the pain but hurt me instead....often they don't know what to say in these situations. As for me, I have no living children only my angels but I believe I am a mother. No one but my immediate family knows and except for a Happy Mothers day whispered with a hug from my mom, no one recognizes I am a mom. But to me, in my heart, I had two children inside of me whom I love and miss dearly so that makes me a mother. You have to believe and follow your heart. As for the guilt....even if you had known you were pregnant there was likely nothing you could have done. Don't feel guilty....I know it is hard not to, even for those who did "everything right". We all think of the "what if i did or didn't do...." *Hugs*
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Lennox28
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 4:38 PM

I don't feel like a mom either.  This was my first pregnancy and I only knew about it for 72hrs before it all ended.  I'm sorry people aren't saying the right things to you.  : (

purfectlilly
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 4:59 PM

 The first time that I was prego, we had time to process and the loss was horible. The 2nd time, it was still pretty bad. But I have to agree. I don't feel like a mother. I feel like a failure. I've lost two this year and there's not much that is going to make me feel better about that.

Lilly

Angela4boys
by Angela on Nov. 30, 2012 at 5:07 PM
Hun, if you could have, you would have. You can't beat yourself up for things that are out of your hands. We suffer and grieve for our loss, but your baby is at peace, safe with The Lord.

Quoting trustgod103:

I know and thank you! I just feel so much guilt because I didn't know i was and maybe i could have prevented it.. but god knows whats best :)

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mommyofnoah208
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:16 PM
1 mom liked this
I am sorry :( it is so hard :(
you are still a mom, you had a baby growing inside you and just because your baby was not able to stay, doesnt take away the fact or title of being a mom. If a mother had a child die during their life, their title of motherhood would not be taken away so neither should yours. I know that you have to miss out on the daily motherhood lifestyle for now, but you still are a mom who you hold your baby in your heart. Thinking of you
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