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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

Anencephaly & Baby Showers

Posted by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 2:54 PM
  • 12 Replies
I apologize in advance if my post offends anyone or makes them sad. I'm sorry that a group such as this has to exist and I'm thankful that you've allowed me to be a member. I haven't had such a loss, but a friend is carrying her baby to term after a diagnosis of anencephaly. She's about 1/2-way through the pregnancy and we know the chances of her baby making it to birth and through birth alive are not the best, but we are very hopeful. We know that if our little fighter is born alive that she will leave us all too soon whether it's moments, days, weeks, etc. My question is this....wouldn't she still have a baby shower and if so, what type of gifts would be most appreciated?
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by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 2:54 PM
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Dani41780
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 3:35 PM
1 mom liked this

Maybe things like engraved necklace, or memory necklace. Charms? Blanket with babies name or stuff like that? I honestly don't know. :(

blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Dec. 6, 2012 at 5:15 PM
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My daughter was born sleeping due to Anencephaly May 3rd, 2012 at 38 weeks.  I found out she had Anencephaly when I was 12 weeks pregnant.  There is a facebook group of Anencephaly moms if your friend is interested, its called Anencephaly Angels.  I had a Prayer Shower for my angel.  I thought I had a post in here about it but I can't find it.  

I had everyone bring a scripture or quote to share that they liked.  And we served lunch.  We had everyone share.  And we played one game and it was guess the size of mom with a ribbon.  

I put that I didn't expect any gifts but I was overwhelmed with love.  I got a frame with Isabelle's full name on it.  I got two scrapbooks two friends made with facebook pictures of mine.  A pillow with Isabelle's name and "A daughter of God" on it.  A photo frame with a poem.  A photo frame with more pictures of my facebook.  And more.  

So any gifts that can help her remember her baby.  I wouldn't do clothes unless you ask her, since Isabelle wasn't going to wear many outfits I wanted to pick them out myself.  Hats are important too and it is really hard to find hats that fit so various sizes that can be strapped or tired around the baby's neck is the best.  

Also does she know about NILMDTS (Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep)?  They are an organization that will provide photographers that will take photos for free at the birth and even some maternity photos.  Those are precious mementos.  If she wants to contact me or talk to another mom that just went through I can provide you my contact details.  I'm so sorry your friend has to go through this too.

momofcrazypants
by Leslie on Dec. 6, 2012 at 5:20 PM

I think something to help her remember the baby by would be the best. I'm so sorry that your friend has to go this. There was a sweet lady that goes to my sister's church that just had a baby with the same condition. She carried to term and named the little one "Noah". He lived for a15 days after his birth and the couple just spent as much time with him as they could. They took him to the park where the couple had their first date. They made a cake for him when he was 1 week old. Just did everything they could with him.

Definitely have a shower. As many good memories that the momma can have, the better. Hugs to you and your friend.

Angela4boys
by Angela on Dec. 6, 2012 at 5:24 PM
Love this... So precious and loving :)

Quoting blessedmommie07:

My daughter was born sleeping due to Anencephaly May 3rd, 2012 at 38 weeks.  I found out she had Anencephaly when I was 12 weeks pregnant.  There is a facebook group of Anencephaly moms if your friend is interested, its called Anencephaly Angels.  I had a Prayer Shower for my angel.  I thought I had a post in here about it but I can't find it.  

I had everyone bring a scripture or quote to share that they liked.  And we served lunch.  We had everyone share.  And we played one game and it was guess the size of mom with a ribbon.  

I put that I didn't expect any gifts but I was overwhelmed with love.  I got a frame with Isabelle's full name on it.  I got two scrapbooks two friends made with facebook pictures of mine.  A pillow with Isabelle's name and "A daughter of God" on it.  A photo frame with a poem.  A photo frame with more pictures of my facebook.  And more.  

So any gifts that can help her remember her baby.  I wouldn't do clothes unless you ask her, since Isabelle wasn't going to wear many outfits I wanted to pick them out myself.  Hats are important too and it is really hard to find hats that fit so various sizes that can be strapped or tired around the baby's neck is the best.  

Also does she know about NILMDTS (Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep)?  They are an organization that will provide photographers that will take photos for free at the birth and even some maternity photos.  Those are precious mementos.  If she wants to contact me or talk to another mom that just went through I can provide you my contact details.  I'm so sorry your friend has to go through this too.

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blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Dec. 6, 2012 at 5:31 PM

Oh also anything she can use at birth to make memories with her baby.  Things to make hand and foot mold.  Paper and ink to get lots of prints of the baby's hands and feet.  Some get two identical stuffed animals and keep one with the baby and the other with the parents like a link to one another.  Even a gift card to build-a-bear so she can make a bear and record the baby's heart beat on it.

purfectlilly
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 6:22 PM

 I think that you should as the mom if she wants a shower. It may be something that she is sensitive about. I do think that the gift ideas are wonderful.

Lilly

doodlebopfan
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 7:48 PM
Ladies, these things are truly wonderful ideas. Thank you so much for sharing with me!
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doodlebopfan
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 7:51 PM
God bless you and your Angel Baby! I love her name! Thank you for this information! The Prayer Shower seems like a wonderful idea. The friend who is pregnant is the young daughter of my friend. I'm passing this info to mom so that she can guage when/if to bring it up to her DD. We live far apart and it's hard enough just saying "How are you?" to someone you SEE is crying or upset, much less sending a message across the computer and wondering if your words send her INTO tears.

Quoting blessedmommie07:

My daughter was born sleeping due to Anencephaly May 3rd, 2012 at 38 weeks.  I found out she had Anencephaly when I was 12 weeks pregnant.  There is a facebook group of Anencephaly moms if your friend is interested, its called Anencephaly Angels.  I had a Prayer Shower for my angel.  I thought I had a post in here about it but I can't find it.  

I had everyone bring a scripture or quote to share that they liked.  And we served lunch.  We had everyone share.  And we played one game and it was guess the size of mom with a ribbon.  

I put that I didn't expect any gifts but I was overwhelmed with love.  I got a frame with Isabelle's full name on it.  I got two scrapbooks two friends made with facebook pictures of mine.  A pillow with Isabelle's name and "A daughter of God" on it.  A photo frame with a poem.  A photo frame with more pictures of my facebook.  And more.  

So any gifts that can help her remember her baby.  I wouldn't do clothes unless you ask her, since Isabelle wasn't going to wear many outfits I wanted to pick them out myself.  Hats are important too and it is really hard to find hats that fit so various sizes that can be strapped or tired around the baby's neck is the best.  

Also does she know about NILMDTS (Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep)?  They are an organization that will provide photographers that will take photos for free at the birth and even some maternity photos.  Those are precious mementos.  If she wants to contact me or talk to another mom that just went through I can provide you my contact details.  I'm so sorry your friend has to go through this too.

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iSMILEheCRIES
by Platinum Member on Dec. 6, 2012 at 9:03 PM
2 moms liked this

 You are a wonderful woman.  The oddest things just make me tear up and I just feel so much peace and love when you talk about your angel.  And these are wonderful, wonderful ideas that I wish I would have thought of. 

Quoting blessedmommie07:

Oh also anything she can use at birth to make memories with her baby.  Things to make hand and foot mold.  Paper and ink to get lots of prints of the baby's hands and feet.  Some get two identical stuffed animals and keep one with the baby and the other with the parents like a link to one another.  Even a gift card to build-a-bear so she can make a bear and record the baby's heart beat on it.

 

blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Dec. 7, 2012 at 12:30 AM

Your welcome.  I know it was hard for my family and friends to see me hurting too.  Best thing your doing for your friend is being there for her and her daughter.  Grandmas are also welcome to the facebook group as well.

Quoting doodlebopfan:

God bless you and your Angel Baby! I love her name! Thank you for this information! The Prayer Shower seems like a wonderful idea. The friend who is pregnant is the young daughter of my friend. I'm passing this info to mom so that she can guage when/if to bring it up to her DD. We live far apart and it's hard enough just saying "How are you?" to someone you SEE is crying or upset, much less sending a message across the computer and wondering if your words send her INTO tears.

Quoting blessedmommie07:

My daughter was born sleeping due to Anencephaly May 3rd, 2012 at 38 weeks.  I found out she had Anencephaly when I was 12 weeks pregnant.  There is a facebook group of Anencephaly moms if your friend is interested, its called Anencephaly Angels.  I had a Prayer Shower for my angel.  I thought I had a post in here about it but I can't find it.  

I had everyone bring a scripture or quote to share that they liked.  And we served lunch.  We had everyone share.  And we played one game and it was guess the size of mom with a ribbon.  

I put that I didn't expect any gifts but I was overwhelmed with love.  I got a frame with Isabelle's full name on it.  I got two scrapbooks two friends made with facebook pictures of mine.  A pillow with Isabelle's name and "A daughter of God" on it.  A photo frame with a poem.  A photo frame with more pictures of my facebook.  And more.  

So any gifts that can help her remember her baby.  I wouldn't do clothes unless you ask her, since Isabelle wasn't going to wear many outfits I wanted to pick them out myself.  Hats are important too and it is really hard to find hats that fit so various sizes that can be strapped or tired around the baby's neck is the best.  

Also does she know about NILMDTS (Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep)?  They are an organization that will provide photographers that will take photos for free at the birth and even some maternity photos.  Those are precious mementos.  If she wants to contact me or talk to another mom that just went through I can provide you my contact details.  I'm so sorry your friend has to go through this too.


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