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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

Is it normal?

Posted by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:17 AM
  • 10 Replies

Hey ladies for the past few months I have been doing nothing but thinking about my baby I m/c in mid march of this year and I have been wondering is this normal to keep feeling this way? It was my first m/c and it has turned my world upsidedown I have two kids already(18)and(3) but wow I never thought that I would still be mourning the loss of my baby and hard too! Sometimes I think I need help and other times I just say the hell with it and when I feel like crying I cry :( when will this painful hurt go away? I know that the hurt will never go away but there is so much pain when I hurt too if this makes any sense to any of you ladies going through or have gone through this and I know there are so many diffrent ways to lose a pregnancy but to me they all are hurtful I just want to find some peace and serenity and for me it seems like it will never come I miss my baby even though I never heard a heartbeat never saw a picture of my little one I miss my baby and nothing can change that! I wish all you ladies who are expecting lots of happiness and a healthy baby I wish I were you!

by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:17 AM
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Replies (1-10):
AndrewsMommy01
by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:21 AM

I am so sorry hun. I lost my baby in July 4 days after I found out I was pregnant after trying for 4 years. I know how you feel and what you are going through. I am still trying to work through my feelings of anger, sadness and not beleaving that it really happened to me. I am here for you...hugs...

mommyofnoah208
by Melissa on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:21 AM
I am sorry for your loss. It is very normal to still be grieving, loosing a baby is a devestating, life changing thing to go through. I think about my son daily and it has been 2 1/2 years..but the pain is different, it isnt overwhelming and I can talk about him without getting too upset. If you feel to overwhelmed with your pain, i would talk with your dr. Thinking of you
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Dani41780
by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:22 AM

I'm really sorry!

NewMom11222011
by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:24 AM

Hi Mieshia,

You're right that all losses are hurtful and there's no such thing as a "normal" reaction.  We are all different individuals and will process losses differently.  For me, I have no birth children and had three m/c, but years ago and my grief is coming back.  You're doing something productive and helpful by reaching out through this forum.  If you have friends who have had m/c it might be helpful to discuss your feelings with them, as well.  Hang in there.

hugs

blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:27 AM
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It has been 7 months since my Isabelle passed and I think about her everyday.  Months 3 &4 were really tough for me but now I'm better just a few bad moments at times.  

Mieshia78
by Member on Dec. 14, 2012 at 10:41 AM

I remember you I read your painful story when you first put a post about your angel baby and could not imagine going through what you have gone through I prayed everyday for you and your baby and wished that she could stay with you where she was safe and away from harm which I know was selfish I think of me to say but that is how I felt and I wish every woman that had to endure that type of pain the same thing I have never forgotten about you and always think about you she was a beautiful baby girl who has now spread her wings to be the beautiful angel you have now watching over you her daddy and her siblings God Bless You!!

blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Dec. 14, 2012 at 12:59 PM

Its not selfish.  I wish she could have stayed too sometimes.  Thank you.

Quoting Mieshia78:

I remember you I read your painful story when you first put a post about your angel baby and could not imagine going through what you have gone through I prayed everyday for you and your baby and wished that she could stay with you where she was safe and away from harm which I know was selfish I think of me to say but that is how I felt and I wish every woman that had to endure that type of pain the same thing I have never forgotten about you and always think about you she was a beautiful baby girl who has now spread her wings to be the beautiful angel you have now watching over you her daddy and her siblings God Bless You!!


momofcrazypants
by Leslie on Dec. 14, 2012 at 1:03 PM

I'm so very sorry. 

KenneMaw
by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 1:19 PM

I had a stillbirth 15  years ago (my first baby) and then 4 years later I had a baby.  I know the that terrible feeling.  NO one should ever have to feel the pain of losing a child.  Honestly, it took almost a year for the major pain and anger to subside.   After the 1 year mark (suriving the holidays, mothers day, what would have been her 1st bday), it got easier.   Yes grief is normal.  You lost a baby and all of the dreams associated with that child.  However, it is important to learn to deal with it if it is affecting your daily life or the lives of those around you.  For me, I found an online support group that was fabulous!   The 2nd preg was scary because I knew that happy endings weren't guaranteed.  Each ultrasound petrified me for fear of not hearing a heartbeat.   That group really helped me.   It is important to talk about your feelings and learn to find a way to deal with them.  

There is one mom I will always remember.  She had 2 kids and she lost her 3rd baby.  She was so sad for months.  finally after almost a year of mourning, her youngest who was about 4 by then, said he wanted to die. She flipped!   She asked him why and he said 'maybe you love me as much as the baby if I am in heaven too".  That finally snapped that mama out of her grief.  

Hugs to you sweet lady.  i KNOW it is hard and I am glad you are talking you sweet baby. 

 

notjstanothrmom
by Member on Dec. 14, 2012 at 3:12 PM
:( It's normal to be sad. I'm pregnant after my 4th and furthest gestational loss and I still cry about my daughter I lost on February. I think it's fine as long as it's not negatively impacting my daily life.

I'm sorry for your loss.
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