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How are you today? January 14

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:27 AM
  • 28 Replies
How are you feeling today? How can we support you?
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by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:27 AM
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Replies (1-10):
iSMILEheCRIES
by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:23 PM

We told our boys (age 6 and 7) about the new baby last night.  I was going to wait until we knew the baby was going to be okay, but then I realized if the baby does die I will want to bury it and the kids will see a new grave under the tree and I felt that was an unfair way for them to learn.  We told them what chromosomes are (the thing that's make you who you are-kid terms) and explained that when me and daddy make babies sometimes the chromosomes get mixed up and it means the baby will not grow right, we said it was no ones fault and all we could do was pray but that sometimes God needs the little babies in Heaven more than we need them on earth so we can't be angry, that we just have to be happy no matter what.  We stressed over and over that this is a happy thing and we will always tell them the truth and everytime we go to the doctor we will tell them what the doctor says.  I might try to schedule a family ultrasound for an afternoon- and go in that morning to make sure everything is okay first.  I realized that my boys have lost 2 babies last year too (they didn't know about the early loss), and they deserve some happy moments with their new sibling too!  I am hoping I did the right thing telling them, I am having doubts now and wish I could protect them more.  Luckily neither one of them carry our "bad chromosome" so they will never have to watch their babies die.

blessedmommie07
by Desiree-admin on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:48 PM
*hugs* you did what you thought would be Better for your kids. Your right we can only do so much to protect them.

I have told my youngest (3) but he doesn't quite understand. We haven't told our 5 yr old but that's because he is a blabber mouth :)


Quoting iSMILEheCRIES:

We told our boys (age 6 and 7) about the new baby last night.  I was going to wait until we knew the baby was going to be okay, but then I realized if the baby does die I will want to bury it and the kids will see a new grave under the tree and I felt that was an unfair way for them to learn.  We told them what chromosomes are (the thing that's make you who you are-kid terms) and explained that when me and daddy make babies sometimes the chromosomes get mixed up and it means the baby will not grow right, we said it was no ones fault and all we could do was pray but that sometimes God needs the little babies in Heaven more than we need them on earth so we can't be angry, that we just have to be happy no matter what.  We stressed over and over that this is a happy thing and we will always tell them the truth and everytime we go to the doctor we will tell them what the doctor says.  I might try to schedule a family ultrasound for an afternoon- and go in that morning to make sure everything is okay first.  I realized that my boys have lost 2 babies last year too (they didn't know about the early loss), and they deserve some happy moments with their new sibling too!  I am hoping I did the right thing telling them, I am having doubts now and wish I could protect them more.  Luckily neither one of them carry our "bad chromosome" so they will never have to watch their babies die.


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echupko
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:56 PM
That's a good reason to tell them! I'm telling my boys after the u/s

Quoting iSMILEheCRIES:

We told our boys (age 6 and 7) about the new baby last night.  I was going to wait until we knew the baby was going to be okay, but then I realized if the baby does die I will want to bury it and the kids will see a new grave under the tree and I felt that was an unfair way for them to learn.  We told them what chromosomes are (the thing that's make you who you are-kid terms) and explained that when me and daddy make babies sometimes the chromosomes get mixed up and it means the baby will not grow right, we said it was no ones fault and all we could do was pray but that sometimes God needs the little babies in Heaven more than we need them on earth so we can't be angry, that we just have to be happy no matter what.  We stressed over and over that this is a happy thing and we will always tell them the truth and everytime we go to the doctor we will tell them what the doctor says.  I might try to schedule a family ultrasound for an afternoon- and go in that morning to make sure everything is okay first.  I realized that my boys have lost 2 babies last year too (they didn't know about the early loss), and they deserve some happy moments with their new sibling too!  I am hoping I did the right thing telling them, I am having doubts now and wish I could protect them more.  Luckily neither one of them carry our "bad chromosome" so they will never have to watch their babies die.

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MommaBoop922
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:22 PM

Im so sorry you have to stress this much.  It really sucks when you can't just enjoy a pregnancy for what it is without worrying.  I think you did the best thing you could for your boys.  You are there mommy and while we cant protect them from everything we sure do our best.  I am really praying that everything goes well for you and I think it will be great to do baby related things with eachother :)  Praying for you to have a happy and healthy pregnancy! 

Quoting iSMILEheCRIES:

We told our boys (age 6 and 7) about the new baby last night.  I was going to wait until we knew the baby was going to be okay, but then I realized if the baby does die I will want to bury it and the kids will see a new grave under the tree and I felt that was an unfair way for them to learn.  We told them what chromosomes are (the thing that's make you who you are-kid terms) and explained that when me and daddy make babies sometimes the chromosomes get mixed up and it means the baby will not grow right, we said it was no ones fault and all we could do was pray but that sometimes God needs the little babies in Heaven more than we need them on earth so we can't be angry, that we just have to be happy no matter what.  We stressed over and over that this is a happy thing and we will always tell them the truth and everytime we go to the doctor we will tell them what the doctor says.  I might try to schedule a family ultrasound for an afternoon- and go in that morning to make sure everything is okay first.  I realized that my boys have lost 2 babies last year too (they didn't know about the early loss), and they deserve some happy moments with their new sibling too!  I am hoping I did the right thing telling them, I am having doubts now and wish I could protect them more.  Luckily neither one of them carry our "bad chromosome" so they will never have to watch their babies die.


MommaBoop922
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:23 PM
2 moms liked this

Im praying for all three of you.  I hope everything goes well with your pregnancies :)  

MommaBoop922
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:26 PM

Today I am doing pretty good :)  I have a lot to do to catch up from being sick but Im happy Im finally feeling better and so is my family. Tonight I will be going through my house with a can of lysol and washing everything is hot water!!  My MIL is leaving today too so things can go back to normal in our home with no more visitors.  Im also super excited because we got dd tickets to see Yo gabba gabba live on the 2nd.  We werent going to go originally and just wait until next year to take both kids but we wanted to do something special for her and give her a special day so we bought some last minute tickets.  She loves the show and we decided that if dd2 still wants to go then we will still go again and manybe make it a bigger trip :)  

AmandaN1
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:48 PM
1 mom liked this

Figured out why I was having such a bad day a few days ago. AF showed the 12th FINALLY! Yay! So I'm ok today. Ready to keep going and try again for our sweet lil one.

Turtledoves
by Bronze Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 3:05 PM

Struggling. It's only day #3 since it happened and day #4 since we found out about what was going on. The grief is still so raw and the heart break is still so painful.

ragitty
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 6:42 PM

I am driving myself crazy. I took a pregnancy test last week and got bfn and I am STILL feeling like I am pregnant because of my uterine cramps, back pain, headaches, and nausea. I am going to destroy myself by overanalyzing every ache in pain in my life. Also, the flu shot drama continues on in dh's family as my sil (that isn't pregnant) is now calling around the pediatricians in the area to prove to me they are not all out of the shot for ds. His ped is out and so are our local pharmacies so we didn't get them and now she is freaking out about it. At least I talked to my sil that made the rule and is having the baby soon and, after a lot of yelling and frustrations, we were able to work some things out and hopefully the main problems are all behind us.

I have cried every night for the past week. I have got to stop doing this to myself but I don't know how.

momofcrazypants
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 6:58 PM

It's so hard, so hard on everyone. I'm so sorry that you are stressing out so much, it's hard not to. I'm stressing and we haven't even started ttc yet! I think a family u/s is a beautiful idea, I may check into that next time as well. (hugs)

Quoting iSMILEheCRIES:

We told our boys (age 6 and 7) about the new baby last night.  I was going to wait until we knew the baby was going to be okay, but then I realized if the baby does die I will want to bury it and the kids will see a new grave under the tree and I felt that was an unfair way for them to learn.  We told them what chromosomes are (the thing that's make you who you are-kid terms) and explained that when me and daddy make babies sometimes the chromosomes get mixed up and it means the baby will not grow right, we said it was no ones fault and all we could do was pray but that sometimes God needs the little babies in Heaven more than we need them on earth so we can't be angry, that we just have to be happy no matter what.  We stressed over and over that this is a happy thing and we will always tell them the truth and everytime we go to the doctor we will tell them what the doctor says.  I might try to schedule a family ultrasound for an afternoon- and go in that morning to make sure everything is okay first.  I realized that my boys have lost 2 babies last year too (they didn't know about the early loss), and they deserve some happy moments with their new sibling too!  I am hoping I did the right thing telling them, I am having doubts now and wish I could protect them more.  Luckily neither one of them carry our "bad chromosome" so they will never have to watch their babies die.


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