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Fighting with dh after loss??

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:27 PM
  • 5 Replies

My dh and I lost our twin girls at 21 weeks just over two weeks ago. The last 4 days we have bickering with each other and not getting along well. I know we are both sad and upset still but this is starting to bring me down even more. Anyone else find you and your dh fighting more after loss? How did you help this :(

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:27 PM
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Replies (1-5):
blessedmommie07
by Desiree-admin on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:33 PM
Yes DH and I did and still do more frequently then we did before. It's hard after a loss it affects both of you and you get easily upset about everything cause you hurting inside. DH and I were short with each other and our kids for a month or so.

Just sit down with each other and say your both hurting but you need to be there for each other especially right now and talk to each other about how you both really feel and are going through.
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MommaBoop922
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:45 PM

Im so sorry for your losses.  Dh and I definitely did fight after our loss.  There are so many emotions after a loss and a lot to think about so its common.  The best thing you can do is sit down and talk to eachother and keep those lines of communication open.  Some people even s eek counseling if they struggle to communicate alone.  You two need eachother more now and while you will still have bad days and still bicker, talking will help.  Maybe plan something nice for the two of you.  That time to reconnect can also gp a long way because I think its easy to feel diconnected after a loss.  ((HUGS)) Hang in there! 

cupcakeluv_333
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:05 PM

yes, I lost my son at 22 weeks in August, so that was months ago. My man and I have almost split many times after and fought so much. We have been in counseling. It gets slowly better over time, but it's so hard. I put some blame on him, wrongly, but its hard to think it through and not get caught up in the pain.

Angela4boys
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 8:27 PM
We didn't. We really just clung to each other once we found out. I know it's hard, there is a lot of emotion.... But someone has to make the move, just hug him, hold each other.... Do it often. You both really need each other.
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momofcrazypants
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 8:48 PM

Not so much, we leaned on each other pretty hard for the most part. We don't have friends or family out where we live. We just moved to this town a year ago from a more urban area and our nearest anythings are 3.5hrs away. Just try to keep the lines of communication open and let each other know how you feel. Talking about it and being there for each other is so important.

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