Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Time Heals All Wounds?

Posted by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:21 PM
  • 12 Replies
I am new here, but I had a Still born baby girl October 30th of this year, and my question is- does that feeling of having a hole in your heart ever go away? Ever since she passed away, I've been seeing yellow butterflies. In my mind, I want to accept that I will just have to wait to see her in heaven someday, but in my heart, I just wish she was here with me where I could rock her, sing to her, feed her, change her diaper, and love her. Even though I never had any memories with her, I still grieve for the missed opportunity.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:21 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
littlelamb303
by Member on Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:25 PM
1 mom liked this

The feeling of pain eases a bit, but never goes away completely.  It will always be there, but not as painful as you are feeling right now.  It will be 19 yrs since I lost a baby girl to stillbirth, and when that day comes along each year, I feel the pain and hurt again(although not as it was in the beginning). I grieved the same way you did.  My arms ached to hold her.  I know how you are feeling    You will never forget, but the constant everyday pain will eventually be a lot less.  Hugs

Nerys-Kianna
by Member on Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:31 PM
1 mom liked this

I am so so sorry for your loss.
The pain will never go away but it will get easier after a long long time.

angelmomofk
by Member on Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:42 PM
Thank you so much. I try so hard everyday to be strong, bit somedays are tougher than others. :-( My closest friend has kind of deserted me as she feels like I should have "snapped out of it" by now. I wish I could just "snap out of it", but I think it is a sadness I will always carry with me, and I am 40 now, and not going to try anymore. It just broke my heart too much.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
iSMILEheCRIES
by Gold Member on Jan. 21, 2013 at 11:01 PM
1 mom liked this

 I gave birth to my daughter at 19weeks.  For the first 3 months I was about useless, I thought the pain would never end or lessen.  Then almost 3 months to the day I noticed the pain had eased some and I still missed her continuously but I was more "memory sad" verses sad all the time.  I don't think the pain will ever go away but I think it eases some.  I found doing something for my daughter- collecting owl figurines for each month/season to place by her grave- has helped alot.  I feel like she is "real" because I am buying her things and telling her why each one is special.  I hope you find some peace and healing soon honey.  This group has been the biggest help though, these women know all my thoughts and feelings because they have been there too.

cali_angel_girl
by Amy on Jan. 22, 2013 at 3:21 AM
1 mom liked this

((hugs)) I am so sorry for your loss hun.  Honestly the pain of having a loss never goes away but with time it does get easier and in my case with time I got to a point where I was at peace with what happend.

Angela4boys
by Angela on Jan. 22, 2013 at 6:42 AM
1 mom liked this
I think you will always have a hole, and grieve for the time you didn't get with her... But, you will make peace with her loss eventually. Time does heal. Just know that your sweet angel wants Mommy happy, she knows you live her, even when you are not crying... It's ok to be happy again. (((Hugs)))
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Turtledoves
by Bronze Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 12:10 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't think time heals. I think it eases the pain.  I only had my loss a week and a half ago, so I don't know if that pain in your heart ever goes away. I don't think it will for me. I think that's the part of my heart she took with her, and I don't want to have it back.

jacksmom3707
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 12:51 PM
1 mom liked this

Time will never heal your heart completely but it will ease your pain as the days, weeks, months and years go by. Losing a child is the worst thing any parent could ever go through no matter what age and that place in your heart will always be there for your lost child. I am so sorry for your loss and I wish you peace.

angelmomofk
by Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 6:07 PM
Thank you all for your kind words. It has been a daily struggle that's for sure!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Ladybugmama86
by Silver Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 7:08 PM

 The pain eases some, but you will never ever get over the missed oppurtinuty of having them here with you I dont think.

Yesterday was my stillborn sons first angelversary and going through the day is easier, but I still have a hard time being around babies that are around a year old, and because of my mc in July I have a hard time being around pregnant women or infants... I just want my babies back!!

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Third Birthday tickersLilypie Fifth Birthday tickersDaisypath Anniversary tickers
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)