Just wanted to vent to people I know will understand.
I had a really rough day in a few areas, but above all, I woke up with severe baby fever this morning and had a rough time calming it. On one hand I feel guilty, it's only been three and a half weeks since my miscarriage. Another part of me aches, and my heart weeps with wanting to hold a baby in my arms. I look at my daughter and cry, I told her she was going to be a big sister. She was so interested in her baby dolls and figuring out how to feed them and loving babies so much, I knew she'd be great at being a big sister. But there's a hole that I know a new baby can't fill, but my arms want to hold a baby and I want a baby so much to fill in these places in my life that were supposed to be filled with a newborn.
I really don't want baby fever, but I don't know how to shake it. We're not going to be trying until sometime in spring, which was my idea and my doctor's recommendation. But ugh, it doesn't help this constant feeling of needing a baby in my life.
Babywearing, co-sleeping, exclusively breastfeeding, AP, natural birthing, happily married SAH Mommy to Katherine Isabelle, and mommy to our Angel baby, Elizabeth Rose.