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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

Mc and other people

Posted by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 10:52 PM
  • 13 Replies
I get so mad and hurt when people think oh wells it's been a month and a half and she is over it by now .why do people who have never lost a baby think that just cuz we didn't have a breathing baby that it makes it hurt less and can just go away . They don't seem to understand it will stay with us for life .
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by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 10:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Turtledoves
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 11:01 PM
Within two weeks, everyone moved on and forgot about it. Its never mentioned, whenever I mention it it goes ignored, and theres no comfort from anyone but my husband and mom. Guess afted the first week I was supposed to be healed and forget like everyone else did. Its been five weeks now but I still have a lot of hard days and days I cry through. I miss my baby, I miss the life I was supposed to have. Im far from healed but it doesnt make a difference to others.
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Namaste09
by Samantha on Feb. 16, 2013 at 12:09 AM
This is my life to a T I totally understand you.

Quoting Turtledoves:

Within two weeks, everyone moved on and forgot about it. Its never mentioned, whenever I mention it it goes ignored, and theres no comfort from anyone but my husband and mom. Guess afted the first week I was supposed to be healed and forget like everyone else did. Its been five weeks now but I still have a lot of hard days and days I cry through. I miss my baby, I miss the life I was supposed to have. Im far from healed but it doesnt make a difference to others.
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sandra.g.h
by Sandra on Feb. 16, 2013 at 12:26 AM

:( I don't know why it is so hard for people to understand that the loss is very real and absolutely devastating... I am still grieving my losses from 1999 and 2011 and some people act like there is something wrong with me. 

mommyofnoah208
by Melissa on Feb. 16, 2013 at 12:31 AM
I know :( it is so difficult when others dont understand. I just think that they dont realize.
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Herlache
by Jessie on Feb. 16, 2013 at 1:29 AM
1 mom liked this
I'm just grateful I found this group without you wonderful ladies I wouldn't have made it. People just think it's done and over get on with your life... They don't understand a part of your life was just taken away. So I will say it again. THANK YOU for all your support!!!
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Mommy4Clara
by Bronze Member on Feb. 16, 2013 at 2:44 AM

This!!!

It's been 11 weeks since my D&C and I'm honestly doing a lot better than I was a month ago, but I swear, everyone seemed to forget about my baby a week or two after my loss. I was 12 weeks pregnant and everyone forgot after just a few days! My best friend announced her pregnancy about 2 weeks after my surgery.  Another good friend (who m.c the week before me) is pregnant already.  My SIL is pregnant and due 3 weeks before what would have been my due date.  It's hard....

However, I remind myself that I will have another baby soon.  I believe my baby will come back to me. 


Quoting Turtledoves:

Within two weeks, everyone moved on and forgot about it. Its never mentioned, whenever I mention it it goes ignored, and theres no comfort from anyone but my husband and mom. Guess afted the first week I was supposed to be healed and forget like everyone else did. Its been five weeks now but I still have a lot of hard days and days I cry through. I miss my baby, I miss the life I was supposed to have. Im far from healed but it doesnt make a difference to others.



cali_angel_girl
by Amy on Feb. 16, 2013 at 4:54 AM

((hugs)) I know hun it's difficult to deal with that.  It's hard for people who have never been through a loss to understand how heartbreaking it is and that its something we never really get over.

Angela4boys
by Angela on Feb. 16, 2013 at 7:28 AM

I think it takes having a loss, to understand a loss.  You are never going to be over it.  You just won't.  You will always miss your baby. A mom who has gone through it will understand, but if someone hasn't, there is just no way they can.  I'm sorry Hun (((hugs)))

Focused_Mom
by Silver Member on Feb. 16, 2013 at 8:09 AM
My husband and I just had a talk similar to this last night. I purchased a baby keepsake box yesterday to put all of our baby's things in. I was 14 weeks when I lost our little one so we didn't have much (the test, ultrasounds, 2 outfits) but I still want to keep them. As we were putting it together, I saw it had a card for name, birthdate, etc. I asked what we were going to name our baby. I told him then, that we were the only ones with the bond only a parent can have with our baby and we need a name for her. That's why I think some people tend to forget or think we should move on quickly. That was our baby we lost. Our blood. No one is going to know the hurt that we have felt because it wasn't their baby. We also have to face that we live in a world that tells us our baby was not a baby and women can freely make a choice to not carry that baby to term. I think some people are so desensitized to what really matters in this world. Sorry for the rant. Im really sorry and I hope and pray the people around you will support you in your hurt and loss.
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ilovekeith12
by Member on Feb. 17, 2013 at 6:11 AM
You sound like me !! My bestie told me about a week and a half after i lost my twins that she is preg and then a few others who don't want to be preg and drink , smoke and take pills . It's so heartbreaking


Quoting Mommy4Clara:

This!!!

It's been 11 weeks since my D&C and I'm honestly doing a lot better than I was a month ago, but I swear, everyone seemed to forget about my baby a week or two after my loss. I was 12 weeks pregnant and everyone forgot after just a few days! My best friend announced her pregnancy about 2 weeks after my surgery.  Another good friend (who m.c the week before me) is pregnant already.  My SIL is pregnant and due 3 weeks before what would have been my due date.  It's hard....

However, I remind myself that I will have another baby soon.  I believe my baby will come back to me. 



Quoting Turtledoves:

Within two weeks, everyone moved on and forgot about it. Its never mentioned, whenever I mention it it goes ignored, and theres no comfort from anyone but my husband and mom. Guess afted the first week I was supposed to be healed and forget like everyone else did. Its been five weeks now but I still have a lot of hard days and days I cry through. I miss my baby, I miss the life I was supposed to have. Im far from healed but it doesnt make a difference to others.





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