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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

Did you buy anything for your lost baby?

Posted by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:20 PM
  • 14 Replies

Ok. So, I was 19 weeks when I lost my baby. My pregnancy is over. :( 

At 14 weeks...i bought a stroller. I have a baby gear obsession. It had been put away for a while since my youngest is 3. I got to dust it off though & I was literally researching all baby things right away when I saw the line on the test. 

I didn't want to buy anything right away. I mean, I did. but I waited...I have had a stroller obsession in the past. So, that was the one thing I was definitely looking for. I have the perfect stroller (IMO) that I use with my 3 year old sometimes but mostly, she likes to walk now, so it just sits there. I bought it thinking I would definitely use it with the next baby. Even though we have four. I wanted one more. Or maybe two. 

We weren't trying but we weren't preventing. We had our first romantic getaway in 10 years in the Fall. So we were definitely having fun! I had broken my foot & well, I needed my exercise and even though we would have liked to waited another year or maybe two--we were just having fun! :) Henry was our Vegas baby! It seemed too perfect! I mean, 10 years of marriage being celebrated & we get a baby!!! 

Anyways.. I love baby things. I was planning out the nursery. We needed to sell our house & try to buy a bit bigger. Just a different plan. We were rearranging the kids room to make room for a nursery. Now, the nursery sits unused. It's a cluttered catch all right now. It was painted. I already had the rug. The crib mattress waits for the crib. I was ready to get in there & decorate! I was waiting to buy most things though until after the gender ultrasound. 

I feel bad for those who made it to full term--they must have had everything bought & ready! What do you do? 

I only had a stroller. And what really sucks is that I was piecing it together secondhand to save money. I found the last pieces brand new--except my husband had made plans weeks ago to pick them up today. They were in a different state, new in the box from a Craigslist Ad. And my husband went over there as planned (he was going for his little side business) and picked them up. So in his car this evening will be the last pieces to my stroller. And yet, I won't have a baby to expect.... :( 

I asked my husband if he wants me to sell the set. But he won't make me sell it. he knows I want that baby. So eventually....but it has to sit there haunting me in the meantime. 

I had read in one of my due date clubs that buying a stroller early on was a bad omen. A few moms agreed with the original poster. but than a couple other moms went out and bought the stroller of their dreams around the same time I did. Maybe a couple weeks sooner. So is really bad to buy baby things early? 

I mean, we all said the same thing,...we saw a deal we couldn't pass up....if we had waited, we had to spend more money on something we could save money on sooner. :( 


by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:20 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Kayla2013
by Bronze Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:29 PM
I have a box full of gender neutral clothing I bought. Lost Jadia at 15 weeks, Taylor at 8weeks, baby A at 6 weeks and baby B at 5 weeks(not twins, different pregnancies)
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Turtledoves
by Bronze Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:36 PM

We almost bought a double stroller but decided to wait a few weeks. Then we found out, so we managed to skip that.

We bought little things though, stuffed animals in her theme, little newborn hats I crocheted, I had been working on a blanket, I had a pregnancy book that I filled out faithfully every week. Just lots and lots of little things that I kept finding after our loss. We had a box made for her and we're storing everything that was meant to be hers in there. We also buried her with a few things, the blanket I was working on, a small little doll that I had made her, etc. 

blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:52 PM

*hugs*  Luckily I found out at 11 weeks my daughter had a fatal birth defect.  And yes I say luckily, even blessed.  Because for the rest of my pregnancy I didn't have an fake illusion my daughter would survive.  My heart breaks for everyone that have found out later and already had baby things.  

I don't think buying baby things early on is a bad omen.  I have oppertunities and good deals already but I just can't yet because I'm so cautious.  It's horrible that a loss makes us question things that we shouldn't need too.  

Angela4boys
by Angela on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:55 PM
I really don't believe in these bad omen type stuff, or whatever. I had not bought anything for the babies, would not have until I had the gender scan two weeks after.
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TwinkleStars918
by Amanda on Mar. 9, 2013 at 8:31 PM

I did. My first loss was at almost 21 weeks and we had known for about 9 weeks that we were expecting a girl from the CVS test. Once we were out of the first tri, we thought it was safe, we didn't think we would lose her, and we knew we were having a girl so we started buying things, family was making things for her. We were just so excited. We had almost finished our nursery when I lost her.

Turtledoves
by Bronze Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 8:33 PM
Have to add, I was so excited for my daughter that I bought many things from the week I found out I was pregnant. We bought all the nursery furniture when I was 16 weeks. We had almost everything done by 20 weeks. She is perfectly healthy and had am ideal pregnancy and birth with her.

I just cant imagine how being excited and wanting to buy things and prepare could ever be bad. In fact, I didnt prepare half as much with my angel as I did witg my daughter so in my case you could say that not preparing for a baby was bad. I dont believe in bad omens though, especially when it comes to the excitment of your baby.
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Namaste09
by Samantha on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:23 PM

Hugs I'm so sorry for your loss. 

Namaste09
by Samantha on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:26 PM


Quoting Turtledoves:

Have to add, I was so excited for my daughter that I bought many things from the week I found out I was pregnant. We bought all the nursery furniture when I was 16 weeks. We had almost everything done by 20 weeks. She is perfectly healthy and had am ideal pregnancy and birth with her.

I just cant imagine how being excited and wanting to buy things and prepare could ever be bad. In fact, I didnt prepare half as much with my angel as I did witg my daughter so in my case you could say that not preparing for a baby was bad. I dont believe in bad omens though, especially when it comes to the excitment of your baby.

This is exactly my opinion my daughter I had everything prepared an done so quick, this time I had been a lot more relaxed an was waiting till gender ultrasound  before really buying anything because I had so much baby girl stuff stored but I still had been browsing baby stuff like crazy planning out what all I wanted.

felisss
by Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:31 PM

I... Got a sleeper pajamas and a toy for my every MC. Now I have a box of those and I never look in it, it's too hard. Maybe when I am well over 50 I will open it, not now. But I am kind of content knowing that I have it. If I ever have a baby I will give the baby the toys and keep the sleepers in the box. I don't believe in bad omen or something so I buy something right after positive test. ((hugs)). It hurts

RN_713
by Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:47 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss.

I have a jungle themed blanket that I bought the last time I was pregnant. I lost that pregnancy at 13 weeks...I refuse to part with the blanket. If I get pregnant again, it won't be used for another baby.
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