Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

New to group

Posted by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 7:23 PM
  • 9 Replies
Hello everyone. My names I Ashley and I am 27 years old from Michigan. I am currently 21 weeks pregnant however my little princess Sadie was just diagnosed with Trisomy 18. A fatal genetic disorder. This is my first pregnancy and my husband and I are devastated. We have not lost our little girl yet, but could happen any day.

We are trying to stay strong however I do not know how much more emotional damage I can take. Can I go 19 more weeks trying to carry this little girl. Never being able to have a shower, not buying her anything, and always having to explain myself to everyone? Or do I get induced early, hold her, and let her be with the angels in heaven.

My due date group doesn't understand what I'm going through and most of then say I am wrong and not a Christian if I get induced early.

Sorry so long
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 7:23 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-9):
momofcrazypants
by Leslie on Mar. 21, 2013 at 7:36 PM

I am so sorry. I can't recommend on what path is the right one for you, only you know that. I did want to tell you that this is a great group and there are women on here who have gone through similar situations. I hope they see your post soon. Again, I am so sorry about your little girl. Please know that we are here for you. (hugs)

mamasredhead
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 7:38 PM
I am so sorry about what I happening to you and your family. Hard times are ahead but I can tell you from experience nothing can replace this little one but life is full of miracles to come. Please know we are here for you. You are in the right place for love and support. If theres anything you need let me know. ~hugs~
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Angela4boys
by Angela on Mar. 21, 2013 at 8:06 PM
I'm so sorry you are going through this. We have another Mama in this group who's daughter had a fatal defect, anacephaly. She will certainly have better advice than I. (((Hugs)))
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
iSMILEheCRIES
by Gold Member on Mar. 21, 2013 at 9:59 PM

 My heart is with you.  You do what is right for you and your family, but either way planning ahead will help the process some.  There are many memories you can create with your daughter no matter when she goes to be with God.  We are all here for you, we have heard and seen a lot in this group even if all the stories vary a little.  When you are ready, there are many ideas for creating lasting memories with your little Sadie.  My biggest regret is not having more memories... there are things I wish I would have done like hand and foot molds.  Hugs and you make the choice that is right for you, everyone chooses different things for diff reasons and I don't think most of those choices have anything to do with being religious.  God understands whats in your heart

mommyofnoah208
by Melissa on Mar. 21, 2013 at 10:03 PM
I am so very sorry for what you are going through. Praying for you
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Mar. 21, 2013 at 10:07 PM
2 moms liked this

I'm so sorry for the horrid news you got. I can relate how heart breaking it is to hear your baby your carrying will not be coming home with you.

At 11 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child I found out she had a fatal birth defect called Anencephaly (missing all or part of the skull and brain). I carried her to 38 weeks when she was born sleeping. I never regretted carrying her. But it was very hard emotionally feeling her growing and moving inside trying to understand why she couldn't live after birth.

You can pm me if you like. As for a shower I wanted one for Isabelle so I had a "prayer shower". Where I asked people to bring scripture, songs or poems that could help me. And they also brought gifts in her memory, like making me pregnancy scrapbooks, frames, pillow wither her name on it. It was emotional but joyful at the same time.

Do what you think is right for your Sadie and you and DH. No one here will judge you. It is a hard decision either way. And like I say you can pm me anytime.

jessica11r
by Bronze Member on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:05 AM
1 mom liked this
Your group is wrong. If you decide t get induced you are still very much a Christian. They can't judge you for any decision you make. I'm not saying to induce, or not, but you need to do what is best for you and your dh. I'm very sorry that you are in this situation. :( this group is very supportive and I hope you will stay here.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Herlache
by Jessie on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:42 AM
Don't listen to what your group said! Do what is right for you and your family. What ever your decision is we will support you here. I'm very sorry you have to go through this. ((hugs))
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Happy_Mcboobs
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 6:52 PM

Hugs! I can't imagine having to make that decision! Maybe there is hope that your baby will heal and be healthy? I personally would hold out for that hope. I lost my baby boy this month at 19 weeks. My mom prayed that it was a mistake and that the baby would be alive....of course, my baby was dead inside me....but miracles do happen I suppose.  I don't know anything about your baby's plight.... :( But this is an amazing group!  I wouldn't bother being in your due date club anymore....they just don't understand....and it would be hard to watch them with healthy babies.... 

I would cherish any time you have with your daughter. I like someone else's idea about a "prayer shower"....have little keepsakes...

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)