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Back at work...

Posted by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:13 AM
  • 16 Replies
I am back in the office and it isn't easy. When I walk by people either get really quiet or stare at my stomach. Only one person has asked how the baby is... but then he shared that he and his wife miscarried as well. They have kids now so it makes me feel a lot better. I can feel myself start to cry every now and then. Holding them back and eventually I won't cry at work at all :-)

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by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:13 AM
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Replies (1-10):
momofcrazypants
by Leslie on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:15 AM
1 mom liked this

I'm so sorry. I hope you have an easy day. Being around others in the beginning can be hard and uncomfortable. I still have people asking about our baby and we lost it several months ago.

blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Apr. 1, 2013 at 11:43 AM

*hugs*  I found if you let yourself cry it all out when your alone that really helps to get all the crying out of you.

Cal2006
by Bronze Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 12:45 PM

 I have been there and I know how hard it is. I still cry sometimes when I talk about it. It got easier each time. I am proud of you for being able to hold them back. I would run to the bathroom and cry a lot at first. Hang in there...it does get better. I'm sorry.

egal105
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 12:53 PM

I am sorry.  I went back to work about 2 weeks ago.  I still have trouble in certain situations, but it does get easier.  For me, going back has been part of the healing process.  I thrive on pattern and normalcy, so being able to work has put me back in my pattern and given me something else to think of.   I'm trying to be very forgiving to myself everyday.  If I have to walk away so that I don't cry, I think that it is ok.  

You can do it.

gcecelie
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:34 PM

Thanks ladies. I am lucky to have so many people here that care and share their stories.

When people ask though... where have you been.. I just blurt out the truth. I don't know if that is sound. Or if someone asks how I am or what happened... I tell them what I know because I really do think people should know for themselves and for the people they love who are having kids.

Is this too forward?

lost2013
by Bronze Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 3:35 PM

Sorry about your lost. I went back to work that Monday right after my miscarriage (I miscarried on a Friday).  I was only 4 weeks so no one knew at my work I was pregnant.  It is hard to be at work and not think about your peanut.  You don't want to cry at work but it is hard not to sometimes, there has been several times that I have almost lost it but I just took a couple of deep breaths but as soon as I left on lunch or for the day I would go to my car and cry. 

egal105
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 4:13 PM

I don't think it is too forward.  It is your reality.

I am a middle and high school teacher.  Most of my students knew what happened, because I asked several coworkers to share so that I didn't have to explain, but occasionally I run into a former student who knew I was pregnant and now see that I am not, so they ask.  I am honest with them.  This type of loss happens more often than I realized and it shouldn't be hidden.  If any thing, word will spread and you will not have to explain as often. It is hard and difficult, but it will get easier. ((hugs))


Quoting gcecelie:

Thanks ladies. I am lucky to have so many people here that care and share their stories.

When people ask though... where have you been.. I just blurt out the truth. I don't know if that is sound. Or if someone asks how I am or what happened... I tell them what I know because I really do think people should know for themselves and for the people they love who are having kids.

Is this too forward?



gcecelie
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 4:54 PM

 Thanks everyone :-)

Angela4boys
by Angela on Apr. 1, 2013 at 6:16 PM
(((Hugs))). Hang in there, you are so brave! I don't think I could have gone to work, I couldn't even answer my phone. Praying for you today!
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3winged
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 7:19 PM

Praying for you and thinking of you.  I am heading back to work tomorrow after having a D&C last week on Wed for a molar pregnancy - I was 7.5 weeks.  This is our 3d loss in 6 months and a handful of my co-workers knew I was pregnant including my 2 supervisors.  I was (and will continue to be) very upfront when people ask me because thats just how I am.  I also agree with egal105 that it isn't something that should be hidden.  Being open with people I think helps get the word out that this kind of thing does happen, that its incredibly painful and difficult for those going through it, and that we need support.  I hate that miscarriage is so taboo and I want to work to change that.  Hang in there, cry whenever you need to, and know you are NOT alone and that you are thought of and prayed for.

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