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Lost my angel baby in 2011

Posted by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:58 PM
  • 5 Replies

Hello Ladies

I have never talked about Him on this website. Here's my story. It was my 4th pregnancy all my other babies were healthy pregnancies, I found out I was pregnant on Valentines day 2011 we were super excited. All my prenatal visits went very good everything looked perfect heartbeat was strong. Move further down the road I started spotting went to the doctor she said all was well it was old blood. Well the spotting stopped, We decided to move from Oklahoma to Kansas for a better job for hubby the doctor was all was fine to move We got to Kansas and the spotting started again I was in the process of looking for a new OB. The spotting again stopped but I was still worried I had never had that happen before. We went to feed the horses on afternoon and as I was standing there blood gushed everywhere, We had only been there for a week and my appointment was for the following week. We went to the er the heartbeat was still good I was 21 weeks 4 days, They admitted me and did an ultrasound the next morning I found out my placenta was pulling away from my uterus and it was a boy. I was kept for 4 days on complete bedrest. The bleeding never really stopped all the way but the doctor said it was healing. I got sent home on bedrest only up for drinks to eat and use the bathroom. Everything was going great the following 2 weeks. One night I got up at 2 am to pee and blood and clots went everywhere. I couldnt walk so we called 911. They wouldnt give me pain meds and the doctor could not be reached well at 3 am the doctor on call came in the room asked if I had, had  anything for the pain nurses told him no and they couldnt find a heartbeat so he looked and listened and kept trying to find it. I loked at him and said "it's okay I already know but I need to push" so at 3:06am he was born at 23 weeks 4 days. He weighed 10 ounces and was 10 inches long. I named him Hagen Allen. I have pics but have never shared them on here not knowing how everyone would react. He was beautiful and so perfect. Thanks ladies I needed to get that out and just talk about him.

by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:58 PM
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Replies (1-5):
mommyofnoah208
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 2:57 PM
I am so very sorry for your loss. Welcome to the group and thank you for sharing your story about your precious baby boy Hagen Allen. You are always welcome to share as much as you are comfortable with. We are all here for support, and to share the love of our babies that are not here with us. Thinking of you
brandymarch2013
by New Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:28 PM

Thank you for your kind words. My family doesn't like to talk about him much

Happy_Mcboobs
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:29 PM

Hi-

How old are your other children? boys or girls? Have you had a rainbow baby? 

I'm sorry for your loss! Thanks for sharing though! I lost my baby boy at 19 weeks. Our 5th pregnancy after four healthy girls. 

If you want to share pictures, there is a great facebook group for loss parents (mostly moms but there are quite a few dads on their too). It's a closed group but they share photos a lot. Just about the only place a loss mama can share photos of their losses if they have photos. I personally don't share my photos. And I am not on facebook anymore either.  I can't remember the name--I just looked up miscarriage/stillbirth groups and that's how I found several. "Born with Wings" is the best one. "SOBBS" is another--that's the main one that has the most photos shared (sometimes its hard to see photos because there are so many)!

brandymarch2013
by New Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:47 PM

I have 2 girls 8yrs and 6yrs 1 boy 4yrs yesterday and rainbow baby was a boy born in febuary of this year so 5 months. 2 girls and 2 boys

blessedmommie07
by Desiree-admin on Jul. 25, 2013 at 1:40 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story. We think all babies are beautiful in this group and your welcome to share more anytime.

I have shared pictures of my angel but I don't share close ups because I am always nervous about people stealing her pics. Never had that happen here but have heard about it happening on Facebook in a couple groups I'm in.

Congrats on your rainbow! I hope he brought some happiness back into your life. I'm expecting my rainbow next month and he has already brought some joy back into our lives that were torn apart after losing our only daughter.
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