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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

One Month Later...Can't Sleep

Posted by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 1:30 AM
  • 8 Replies

Hi. I miscarried about a month ago. I was 6 weeks along and my husband, who hadn't really viewed the pregnancy as "real" yet is already over it and kind of expects me to be too. I read a list somewhere of the top 10 things not to say to a woman right after miscarriage and I think he said at least 5 of them. "It was God's will." "You can always have another baby." "You weren't even that far along." etc etc etc. I can count the number of people that know on my 10 fingers.

Anyway, like I said. It's been a month and in that month I haven't slept very well at all. It take me a really long time to fall asleep and sometimes I can sleep good for 30-45 minutes and then wake up and then about 10-15 minutes later fall back to sleep...and the cycle continues.

Has anyone else experienced this?

by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 1:30 AM
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Replies (1-8):
blessedmommie07
by Desiree on Sep. 23, 2013 at 6:51 AM
*hugs* I'm sorry your hubby isn't being supportive. Grief can affect your sleep. Have you thought about talking to your doctor about taking something to help you sleep?
Angela4boys
by Angela on Sep. 23, 2013 at 8:09 AM

I had a lot of insomnia following my first loss.  I don't even know how long it lasted, but probably several months. 

ksadberry49
by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 9:20 AM

No. I haven't talked to my doctor. I got mildly hooked on sleeping aids in high school, and even if they're prescribed I don't want to go back down that road.

sjozuna06
by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 11:25 AM
I am on pain meds and that helps me go to sleep every night...
Is this ur baby #1??
davegirl
by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 9:11 PM

SO sorry for your loss. Men can be a bit clueless. They don't understand what it feels like to have something growing inside of you and then to have it taken away so tragically. I found out at the ER after being there for 6 hours. Got home at 1:30 am and had to wait until 3:30 am to tell my husband because he works nights. And the first thing he said to me was, "When do we start trying again?" I couldn't even wrap my head around what I lost yet, let alone think about another one. I finally said to him, "Please don't minimize my feelings. You may not think it's a big deal, but I am telling you it is a big deal to me." He has since shut up and just gives me a lot of hugs. I remember waking up in the middle of the night for a couple of nights before I found out the baby had died, I think my body was trying to tell me something then :(

You may want to visit a therapist with your hubby...maybe minimizing it is his defense mechanism to help him cope with the loss. Or, ask him if he would read a book to help him understand you better. I just read a great book today in one sitting today called "The Seen and the Unseen," it is a woman's personal memoir about her first trimester miscarriage and it was amazing that she felt every single thing I had felt, and even had some of the same thoughts I had running through her head. For your insomnia, maybe try some Sleepytime tea or Melatonin? They are sort of natural cures, but don't take them if you fall pregnant again as herbal/natural stuff is iffy during pregnancies. Hope this helps, I pray that you heal soon. xxxxx hugs 

ksadberry49
by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 10:19 PM

Um...No. This was baby 3. Only one birth though. So...2nd miscarriage. First one was an unplanned pregnancy with a guy I hooked up with because I was sad about an ex, so it didn't hit me nearly as hard as this one seems to be hitting.


Quoting sjozuna06:

I am on pain meds and that helps me go to sleep every night...
Is this ur baby #1??



sjozuna06
by on Sep. 23, 2013 at 10:35 PM
Sorry to hear... :(
It sure is hard... I would've never imagine it would be this hard...


Quoting ksadberry49:

Um...No. This was baby 3. Only one birth though. So...2nd miscarriage. First one was an unplanned pregnancy with a guy I hooked up with because I was sad about an ex, so it didn't hit me nearly as hard as this one seems to be hitting.



Quoting sjozuna06:

I am on pain meds and that helps me go to sleep every night...

Is this ur baby #1??





snakesNsnails
by on Sep. 24, 2013 at 11:46 AM

I'm so sorry..yes i had trouble sleeping, still do occassionally and it has been about 2 months since my miscarriage. In fact, I'm fighting some depression, just recently.  But, the last few nights I have slept pretty good. I think it's part of the grief. I can understand not wanting to take any meds. I don't want to either. I think it will pass with time. Again, I'm so sorry. (((hugs)))

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