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Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss Support

why we shouldn't have to keep pregnancy a secret for the first trimester (m/c mentioned)

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http://www.xojane.com/issues/first-trimester-miscarriage-stories

Can someone make this clicky for me?? Otherwise if you're mobile you can copy and paste.

I felt like this was so perfectly written. I openly shared my loss last month with my FB network and I got quite a few PMs from other mothers who had also recently lost and never told anyone and that is so heartbreaking to me. I came across this and had to share with you ladies.
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by on Dec. 17, 2013 at 6:13 PM
Replies (11-15):
.sp4rkl3z.
by Bronze Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 12:53 PM
I figured we were on the same page!! Your last paragraph is spot on!!

Quoting Angela4boys:

Oh goodness, no way, I agree with you!  :)  I often tell people that they should tell right away, fear of having a loss is no reason to keep the secret, especially if they would benefit from the support.  My first loss, was so hard, so public, but there is no way I could have kept it secret, I was in the hospital 5 days, very sick, and we needed support.  My second loss, at 9 weeks, I really needed the privacy, and was glad I didn't have to explain to everyone. 

I agree with you 100% everyone should do what they feel.  I think it's crazy that we have to keep things under wraps to protect us from other people, or that our emotions are somehow inappropriate, when they aren't. 

Quoting .sp4rkl3z.: Don't get me wrong! I agree completely with whatever way works for each individual woman and loss!!



Quoting Angela4boys:

Thanks for sharing.  I think people should do what feels right to them.  I had one very public loss, in the second trimester, and another loss at 9 weeks, that nobody knew about.  That's what worked for me....but I know some people need more support from others.  I had this group at the time, and I couldn't have asked for anything more. 


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busyizzybsmom
by Betsy on Dec. 18, 2013 at 1:18 PM

I know that every woman is different and some do better with no one knowing, but this article perfectly expresses my thoughts on the matter. Amen

jjchick75
by Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 3:00 PM
I think a miscarriage is just like any other loss and people handle it differently. My sister had 2 miscarriages in 6 months, the 2nd one was just about a month before mine. She really wanted to talk to me about it and I just wasn't ready. It was really hard for both of us. I wanted very badly to talk to her and have someone who understood what I was going through but I just wasn't ready. Eventually as time went on, we were able to talk and she has been one of my biggest supporters through everything the last 6 months has brought(miscarriage, long recovery, hysterectomy, and now we are in the process of adopting). I think women should feel comfortable handling their losses and pregnancies in whatever way feels right to them.
.sp4rkl3z.
by Bronze Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 3:32 PM
Absolutely, and whether each woman wants to share or not share, it should be supported! I just find that m/c and even infant losses are downplayed by people who have never experienced them and I feel like my contribution to changing that is by openly talking about what I'm going through. I know that not everyone feels the same though

Quoting jjchick75: I think a miscarriage is just like any other loss and people handle it differently. My sister had 2 miscarriages in 6 months, the 2nd one was just about a month before mine. She really wanted to talk to me about it and I just wasn't ready. It was really hard for both of us. I wanted very badly to talk to her and have someone who understood what I was going through but I just wasn't ready. Eventually as time went on, we were able to talk and she has been one of my biggest supporters through everything the last 6 months has brought(miscarriage, long recovery, hysterectomy, and now we are in the process of adopting). I think women should feel comfortable handling their losses and pregnancies in whatever way feels right to them.
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cali_angel_girl
by Amy on Dec. 18, 2013 at 6:29 PM

Thanks for sharing :)

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