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First Loss

Posted by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:52 PM
  • 5 Replies
A few weeks ago I had a miscarriage, this is the first time I have ever been pregnant and I was around seven weeks, I am 20 years old just and I know that it is common to miscarry in your first trimester, but it all baffles me abit, like I've been thrown in the deep end, is it common for women to loose their first? And does this mean I will have trouble with baring a child? There just seems to be so many unanswered questions floating around in my head, another is how do I comfort the partner he wants to be my rock but I can see it in his eyes that he's broken because it's not the first time this has happened to him obviously with previous partners, could that mean there may be something wrong with his sperm? Or does it not work like that? And answers will be greatly appreciated :)
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:52 PM
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Replies (1-5):
cmj33
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:58 PM
It is nothing either of you did. Something just didn't match up. I had a MC going on 3 weeks ago. I also have a almost 7 month old. You.will.have a baby. Dont worry. Gl mamma.
Angela4boys
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 7:51 PM
There is no way of knowing if he may carry some genetic trait that increases the likelihood of miscarriage without having testing done. (((Hugs))). I'm so sorry for your loss...unanswered questions are an unfortunate, but normal part of this process. It seems more common than a straight answer.
blessedmommie07
by Desiree-admin on Dec. 30, 2013 at 9:24 PM

I'm sorry for your loss.  Sometimes it just happens and we're not sure why.  I couldn't tell you how common it is with a first baby.  My loss was my 3rd.  It isn't an indicator if you can have children or not.  Some people miscarry maybe once and go on to have healthy children after and sometimes people have mulitple losses.  There is no way to tell.  

My first is not my husband's bio.  Our second (first together) had a minor birth defect.  Then our 3rd child had a fatal birth defect it was really hard for my hubby.  He thought it was all his fault and that he couldn't have healthy children.  But our 4th child is our rainbow baby and perfectly healthy.  It probably is just a weird coincidence that it happened before with your SO's previous partners.

Unfortunately a lot of your questions you may never get answers for.  *hugs*

cali_angel_girl
by Amy on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:45 AM

((hugs)) I am sorry for your loss hun. There really isn't any way to tell if he carry's something genetically that caused your loss unless he has some test done.  

marsh48433
by Lisa, Michigan mom on Dec. 31, 2013 at 9:02 AM

I am so sorry for your loss!  Pregnancy loss is very common, unfortnately.  I had three successful & very uneventful pregnancies before suffering my 1st loss.  There's no rhyme or reason to it.  It does not mean you'll have issues......for some yes because they have other issues that make it difficult but for others there's no reason why the pregnancy did not last, or at least no visible answers.  My advice with your partner is to just be there, talk about it........bring it up and see if he wants to talk.  Sometimes men do but most of the time they do not, they just deal and every once in awhile break down & share their feelings.  They feel like they need to be the backbone and support us and honestly it goes both ways.  HUGS!!

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