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Missing A Piece Of My Heart

Posted by on Nov. 29, 2017 at 6:29 PM
  • 2 Replies
I am 30 years old and Had lost all hope of ever having a baby since I'd tried and nothing had come of it. Just when I'd given up hope I ho to the doctor thinking I had some sort of stomach flu and she tells me I'm pregnant. I carried my baby until two days ago when I lost him at almost 15 weeks. We were going to name him Navi and we were so excited and ready to meet him but now that's never going to happen. My husband tries to cheer me up by avoiding the subject and talking about work and movies I know he's hurting too but I wish we could talk about it. What hurts the most is that since he was under 20 weeks we didn't get to bring him home and bury him so it feels like we were left completely empty handed without even a place to mourn at. I hadn't felt him move yet but the night I lost him I could feel him kicking around minutes before the doctor said he couldn't see him in my belly on the ultrasound anymore and sure enough he was on his way out when he checked. I'm hurting so bad sometimes I wish I could've gone with him. He was all I ever wanted and It was taken away from one day to the next.
by on Nov. 29, 2017 at 6:29 PM
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MichelleLZ
by Member on Nov. 29, 2017 at 8:48 PM
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my son at 20 wks. If it’s not too late I think you should be able to claim his body. Call the doctor/ hospital and find out. I forget how it worked because so much is a blur about making funeral arrangements but we asked to have the body and signed papers to have the mortuary pick him up. There was a little confusion and the hospital almost didn’t release him but we got him and he has a spot at the cemetery. Etsy also sells personalized memorial stuffed animals. I don’t have his birth certificate but I have his death certificate and a few of his things in a box. Let yourself grieve. Find a support group in your area (take your husband with you). Your husband may not be ready to talk about his grief now but he will when he’s ready. The only time I ever saw my husband cry was when our son died. But he spent a lot of time trying to be strong for me. We used to talk every night right before bed to check in with each other and make sure we were both doing “okay” (relative term when you just lost a baby). He already had a therapist and I think she was a big help to him too. I am so sorry about your son. I’ll be praying for you.
Marshmallow2018
by on Nov. 30, 2017 at 8:16 PM

I am so sorry for you and your husband. I lost my babies at around 12 weeks so I did not get to bury them. You are so right about needing to mourn. Are you in a place where friends and family could gather together and have a memorial service for Navi? I know of a family who planted a tree, set up a stone and a small bench as a kind of memorial garden for the baby they lost. You are right about needing to share this with your husband. Hold each other and cry together. I will pray for you as you mourn and ask God to comfort you both.  

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