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Feeling sad, and lost

Posted by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 1:19 AM
  • 2 Replies

For some reason, I've been feeling really sad lately...so much so, that the thought of "leaving" has crossed my mind. But I know I'd never do that; I wouldn't want to hurt my family. The thing is, I have nothing to feel sad about. At least nothing major.

Just a little background, I'm in my late forties, married and have two grown sons, the youngest who's 18 and living at home. I've dealt with depression and severe PTSD most of my life. I've been through therapy though (although I don't see a therapist anymore) and have managed my symptoms with supplements, exercise and a mood stabilizer. Anyway, I thought everything was going well. I have my bad days like everyone else, but the last few weeks I've felt so lost and useless.

Maybe it's because I'm going through a life transition. I mean, our sons are creating their own lives, and I'm very happy for them. My husband, who is older than me, is going to retire soon. Early this year I was diagnosed with a herniated disk, and have been in quite a bit of pain at times. The worst part is that I can't do much exericise at all because of this problem. I miss being able to do dance and yoga. Our sweet dog, who I absolutely adored, died a couple months ago...and I miss her terribly. Suddenly I feel old, useless and washed up. I'm sorry if it sounds like I'm whining...I'm kind of embarrassed to say all this. I don't want to talk about this too much with my husband, or my good friend because I'm used to dealing with things myself. I'm not sure why I'm saying all this, except I just couldn't keep it in any longer.

Anyway...thank you for listening everyone.

by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 1:19 AM
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Replies (1-2):
polishpride
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 1:47 AM

 You know we sorta have a few things in common here and I can relate to what you are saying. I feel like that too, just leaving like fmy family would be better off w/o me.I'm 49 and have 2 grown sons and a 20 yr old daughter. Sons are on thier own daughter lives here and in college . I have a screwed up back too and am enrolled in Mich. vocational rehabiitation to help me w/ schooling to get another job. 

Alota  times I just dont know where im going in life. I think its age & transitioning too.

I used to dance all the time back in the day. i spent every weekend at the disco!!  I guess finding a hobby may help.

jazi1105
by Ruby Member on Jun. 27, 2010 at 10:52 AM

I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I'm sending lots of hugs your way! Cheer up hun! 

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