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I'm not alone, right?

Posted by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 11:51 PM
  • 13 Replies
My daughter is 18 weeks. I had to go back to work, at a job I hate, six weeks after she was born because my husband got laid off.

It's been up and down since then, but it's starting to seem more down than up lately. I feel like there isn't much of a bond. And that she loves my husband more than she does me. It's stupid I know, but she giggles and coos for him but won't for me.
She still doesn't sleep very well at night, so I'm generally exhausted at work.
I'm starting to feel like nobody needs me. Like she wouldn't notice if I weren't around anymore. Part of me knows that isn't true, but I can't help it. This gets better, right?
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by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 11:51 PM
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Replies (1-10):
angels652
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 12:13 AM

Does your husband help getting up with the baby since he's laid off? How awful you must feel, physically as well as emotionally. I would spend as much time with the baby as I could. Things could change and maybe he will go back to work, if he does will you still have to work also? Don't beat yourself up about the way your feeling. You are her Mother and no one can ever take your place, it will get better sweetie, try not to think negatively about not being needed....you are ♥  I really hope things get better for you, maybe you should talk it over with your husband about how you are feeling. Hugs

AllThatBabyJazz
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 12:34 AM

She said it perfectly *hugs* You're a great mom. 

Quoting angels652:

Does your husband help getting up with the baby since he's laid off? How awful you must feel, physically as well as emotionally. I would spend as much time with the baby as I could. Things could change and maybe he will go back to work, if he does will you still have to work also? Don't beat yourself up about the way your feeling. You are her Mother and no one can ever take your place, it will get better sweetie, try not to think negatively about not being needed....you are ♥  I really hope things get better for you, maybe you should talk it over with your husband about how you are feeling. Hugs


leahbeah143
by Leah on Jul. 9, 2011 at 1:09 AM

 *hugs*

working full time and being mommy to a little one is definitely not easy! You're running on fumes at all times, you're overly sensitive, your emotions are out of control, on top of the normal worries of home, the money stress, all that stuff. And hating your job just makes everything worse. But always remember that you ARE a great mom and your daughter does need you.

annaica
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 1:15 AM
I didn't work but I felt the same. She is 17 months and still wakes up twice to three times to nurse... it is overwhelming. Postpartum depression is not easy. But you can get thru it. I did- from talking in this group! I am glad you're able to open up, that is the first step... have you joined the postpartum support group?
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mommy31210
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 1:59 AM
i know exactly how you fell i was the same way. give it time and she will want you all the time and you will go i want my space back lol.
momadrift
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 3:46 AM
Thanks guys. I do try to talk to my husband, and did have a good talk with him after I posted. He has been amazing, he's been doing all the dishes and laundry and he does get up at night sometimes to help. He let me cry, kept the tissues coming, and then gave me chocolate.
And I did join the postpartum group as well. And I found a listing for an actual ppd group near home. I'm working on it. Thanks everybody.
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matreshka
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 8:33 AM

Good! I'm glad your husband is supportive, it really can change how bad the overwhelming feelings get.  Keep talking with him and lean on us anytime you need to.  I have a 10 month old and I have had some of the same feelings. For the first time ever LO is going through a daddy phase and I feel hurt by it, even though rationally I know its normal.

Quoting momadrift:

Thanks guys. I do try to talk to my husband, and did have a good talk with him after I posted. He has been amazing, he's been doing all the dishes and laundry and he does get up at night sometimes to help. He let me cry, kept the tissues coming, and then gave me chocolate.
And I did join the postpartum group as well. And I found a listing for an actual ppd group near home. I'm working on it. Thanks everybody.


deltathree
by Platinum Member on Jul. 9, 2011 at 11:05 AM

hugs

momadrift
by on Jul. 9, 2011 at 11:23 PM
If they go through a daddy phase, and he stays home with her, does that mean it will be a "mommy phase" for us? Lol


Quoting matreshka:

Good! I'm glad your husband is supportive, it really can change how bad the overwhelming feelings get.  Keep talking with him and lean on us anytime you need to.  I have a 10 month old and I have had some of the same feelings. For the first time ever LO is going through a daddy phase and I feel hurt by it, even though rationally I know its normal.

Quoting momadrift:

Thanks guys. I do try to talk to my husband, and did have a good talk with him after I posted. He has been amazing, he's been doing all the dishes and laundry and he does get up at night sometimes to help. He let me cry, kept the tissues coming, and then gave me chocolate.

And I did join the postpartum group as well. And I found a listing for an actual ppd group near home. I'm working on it. Thanks everybody.



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MissKathleen297
by on Jul. 10, 2011 at 10:39 AM

BUMP!

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