Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I want it to end, but I don't know where to begin.

Posted by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:29 PM
  • 6 Replies

As I write this, DS is in his crib wailing like the world is coming to an end. Before he was born, I thought about having another baby, a son, every day. He was longed for, hoped for and prayed for. I couldn't wait for him to be born. But now, I don't know how I ever thought those things. I wish I didn't have him, as terrible as that sounds. I wish I didn't have any kids for that matter. I'm not fit for this. I don't have the patience or the nerves strong enough to deal with his persistant crying or my 4 year old DD's back talk and attitude. I absolutely hate being a mother. I don't know if this feeling will ever go away. I'm lashing out at DD and it takes so much in me not to lash out at the baby, too. He wants me to hold his all the time. He cries like no other when I don't. My back feels broken and my head is splitting. I just want to get out of here. I want to grab my keys and take off. DS won't let DH soothe him or comfort him, so there's very little help there. As soon as DS knows I'm gone (which is about 30 sec after I walk out the door), he starts crying, and won't stop until I come back and hold him. Someone shoot me, please!

My home feels like a prison. I feel like I don't exist to the outside world. I feel disconnected, depressed, angry, short tempered... the list goes on. There's no help. 

I hate this. All the joy associated with having my son is gone. 

You want to know the sad part? I intern at a pregnancy clinic where I counsel girls in crisis pregnancies! How am I fit for that anymore?

Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Kids Birthday tickers
Lilypie First Birthday tickers
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:29 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-6):
towerjunkie1989
by Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:35 PM
My daughter was the same way and I felt just like you. I put myself in a time out. Lengthen the time between holding him. Put him where his toys are or have sister play with him. It took a few weeks for my daughter to figure out that mommy wasn't just going to hold her because she wanted me too. It does get better. Go out without the kids every month. Reconnect with YOU
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
DAHLONEGAMOMMY
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:37 PM

PLEASE TALK TO SOMEONE.If you cant go to a therapist, message me. I wont judge you. I can see that you are overwhelmed and most new mothers are. Not every woman is cut out to be a mother. At least you have the courage to say it out loud. It sounds like you may be suffering some postpartum depression and anxiety. My heart is breaking for you and your family. However, there isnt a mother in the world who has not been overwhelmed at least once. It is hard to go from being an independent strong woman to a life that is made up of kids, husband, home, and the other million things that go along with being a mother and wife. Dont give up. Do you have any family that could offer a reprieve? If you want to get it all out and you dont have anyone you can talk to, message me and I will listen and do what I can to help you get through the harsh moments. Anytime. 

Mamivon3
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 11:05 PM

 If your LO is fed, changed, just took a nap, and no hidden burp is present, let him be. Try talking with him. Just tell him what you do. I clean this or I put this away. having something to look at is good or a bouncer chair if you have one. If it comes with vibrations even better. Most kids like that. Or a swing. And remember to breath.

matreshka
by on Aug. 18, 2011 at 9:40 AM

(((hugs))) i get overwhelmed at times too, LO who is 11 mo ols only is comforted by me, not even Dh can seems to be able to soothe him.  mamivon3 has some good ideas. 

allthatjazz251
by on Aug. 18, 2011 at 5:11 PM


Quoting Mamivon3:

 If your LO is fed, changed, just took a nap, and no hidden burp is present, let him be. Try talking with him. Just tell him what you do. I clean this or I put this away. having something to look at is good or a bouncer chair if you have one. If it comes with vibrations even better. Most kids like that. Or a swing. And remember to breath.

He has a chair, but it's not a bouncer. It does vibrate, but I keep forgetting to buy batteries for it. When he's crying like this, nothing works but me picking him up. Not even his swing. >_<

Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Kids Birthday tickers
Lilypie First Birthday tickers
BaByMaMmA0610
by on Aug. 18, 2011 at 5:34 PM

I think we all feel liike that at first for awhile at least I know I do cuz yes u do loose that indepence & it's a huge change it doesw get easier. I agree u should talk to someone if possible especially before u take any drastic measures I am not judging u at all as I said I've been there before. Sooner then you know it ur son will be at the age where he says that he juz want to play on his own the independant satge hehe good times & sad times mixed feelings started with my daughter at 1 she's now 2 & only sometimes wants to paly with mommy. It gets easier u can do it  :) GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)